Happy matrimonial agency. 幸福婚介所。 Indoor the mediation, river Feng looks that Kang does not put down three humanity: „After my appraisal, the issue that among your mothers and daughters-in-law several years accumulated were too many, the mediation difficulty belonged high-level, needs to charge 100,000 mediation fees, must accept the mediation specifically, you can first discuss, when reached an agreement then shouted me.” 调解室内,江枫看着康不平三人道:“经过我的评估,你们婆媳之间几年积累下来的问题太多了,调解难度属于高级,需要收取十万的调解费,具体要不要接受调解,你们可以先商量一下,等商量好了再喊我。” Then, river Feng then opened the door to walk. 说完,江枫便推开门走了出去。 river Fenggang closed the door, reckless Jinhua could not bear, filled with fury is staring at Liu lotus, „was the good deeds that you did, 100,000 mediation fees, how many years was my son laborious to accumulate this sum of money?” 江枫刚把门关上,胡金花就忍不住了,满腔怒火的盯着刘莲,“都是你干的好事,十万块的调解费啊,我儿子得辛苦多少年才能攒下这笔钱？” Liu Lianwen said the anger also to well up instantaneously, „what only knew to blame me, was this my issue? If you have appearance that becomes mother -in-law, we as for arriving at today this?” 刘莲闻言怒火也瞬间涌了上来,“什么都只知道怪我,难道这是我一个人的问题吗？你要是有个当婆婆的样子,我们至于走到今天这一步吗？” reckless Jinhua refuted immediately: „In your eye also has my mother-in-law? If you have an appearance that becomes the daughter-in-law, respects my point slightly, we are also insufficient to arrive today this step. Also is now this age, if before, your such daughter-in-law absolutely did not have the fruit to eat.” 胡金花立马反驳道:“你眼里还有我这个婆婆吗？你要是有个当儿媳妇的样子,稍微尊重我一点,我们也不至于走到今天这一步。也就是现在这个年代,若是在以前,你这样的儿媳妇绝对没有好果子吃。” Liu lotus refuses to admit being inferior saying: „Respect mutual, you do not respect me, why to want me to respect you? You also know that now was the new times, before be not hugging again, that feudalistic thinking, I did not eat that set.” 刘莲不甘示弱道:“尊重是互相的,你都不尊重我,凭什么要我尊重你？你也知道现在是新时代了,别再抱着以前那种封建思想,我不吃那一套。” Saw two people non- sub-fields gather and opened pinched, Kang did not put down the blue vein of frontal eminence to beat unceasingly, exclaimed in a low voice: „Did you two quarrel individually good? Quarrelled at home even, coming to here also to quarrel, lost face?” 看到两人不分场合的又开掐了,康不平额角的青筋不断跳动,低声吼道:“你们两个别吵了行不行？在家吵就算了,来这里还吵,丢不丢人啊？” reckless Jinhua opens mouth to say anything, finally swallows back. 胡金花张了张嘴想说什么,最终又咽了回去。 Liu Lianchou husband eyes, looked at crowd one of the outside hall by the frosted glass, tactful shutting up, here truly is not the quarrelling place. 刘莲瞅了老公一眼,又透过磨砂玻璃看了外面大厅的人群一眼,也识趣的闭嘴,这里确实不是吵架的地方。 „I take you not to have the means that I looked that did not need to discuss again, I went out to make a payment to accept the mediation immediately, otherwise our home must disperse sooner or later.” Kang does not put down is feeling suffocated to say. “我已经拿你们没办法了,我看不用再商量了,我马上出去交钱接受调解,否则咱们这个家迟早要散。”康不平憋着气说道。 reckless Jinhua thinks it over or does not give up that big sum of money, said hastily: „Ok, you are work for three years is not possible to accumulate so much money laboriously, bringing to mediate is not cost-effective, we went back, since she disliked I, I went back to pack the thing, returned to Guandong to live.” 胡金花想来想去还是舍不得那么大一笔钱,连忙说道:“算了吧,你就是辛苦工作三年都不一定能攒下这么多钱,拿来调解太不划算了,咱们还是回去吧,既然她不待见我,我回去收拾收拾东西,回粤省老家去生活。” Liu Lianwen said thinks the resentment to go back, but endured finally. 刘莲闻言又想怼回去,但最终又忍了下来。 Kang does not put down shakes the head saying: „Mother, the Guandong house is shabby, cannot be occupied by the person, where do your one person go back me to feel relieved? We make a payment to mediate, so long as you can live together in peace and harmony, I work am do not dislike again laboriously tired.” 康不平摇头道:“妈,粤省老家的房子早就破旧不堪了,根本不能住人,你一个人回去我哪里放心？咱们还是交钱调解,只要你们能够和睦相处,我工作就是再辛苦都不嫌累。” reckless Jinhua also knows that a person returns to Guandong life truly some is not realistic. 胡金花也知道一个人回粤省老家生活确实有些不现实。 After all their Kang moved from Guandong to Jiangxi has dozens years, the house in native place has truly broken cannot be occupied by the person, before Kang did not put down the grandfather and father were alive, occasionally goes back one time to live in the hall grandfather home. 毕竟他们康家从粤省搬迁到赣省已经有好几十年了,老家的房子确实已经破得不能住人了,之前康不平爷爷以及父亲在世的时候,偶尔回去一次都是住在堂爷爷家。 Since the grandfather and father died of illness one after another, their rarely returned to Guandong, recently went back Kang not to put down the marriage time. 自从爷爷以及父亲相继病逝后,他们一家就很少回粤省老家了,最近一次回去还是康不平结婚的时候。 This goes back to live in the hall grandfather home to be passable occasionally one time, may make a long stay in hall grandfather family/home that definitely is incorrect. 这偶尔回去一次住堂爷爷家说得过去,可长住在堂爷爷家那肯定是不行的。 Can this money really spend? 难道这钱真的非花不可了？ Blames this ruined family daughter-in-law, reckless Jinhua to get more mad, looked that Liu lotus this daughter-in-law is not even more pleasing to the eyes! 都怪这个败家儿媳,胡金花越想越气,看刘莲这个儿媳越发不顺眼了！ Liu lotus is also loving dearly this sum of money, she sums up the reason to mother -in-law on similarly, looked that mother -in-law is about is not pleasing to the eyes. 刘莲也在心疼这笔钱,她同样把原因归结到婆婆身上,看婆婆也是左右不顺眼。 Kang did not put down the seeing that headache, he does not have the means in any case, can only seek help from Grandmaster river, hopes that his mediation can play the role, otherwise the home sooner or later tossing about did not have with the wife by his old lady. 康不平见状头痛不已,反正他是没办法了,只能求助于江大师,希望他的调解能够起到作用吧,否则这个家迟早被他老娘跟老婆给折腾没了。 Therefore, he no longer solicited their suggestions, pushed the door glass door directly, to sitting river Feng in front of computer said: „Grandmaster river, we have reached an agreement, please come.” 于是,他不再征求她们的意见,直接推门玻璃门,对坐在电脑前的江枫说道:“江大师,我们已经商量好了,请你进来一下。” When river Feng enters the mediation room, Kang did not put down then to say his own decision directly, „Grandmaster river, we are willing to accept the mediation, does not know how can do?” 等江枫进入调解室,康不平便直接把他自己的决定说了出来,“江大师,我们愿意接受调解,不知道要怎么做？” river Feng nods saying: „Old rule, we first, starts from Ms. reckless!” 江枫点头说道:“老规矩,咱们先一个个来,就从胡女士开始吧！” hears word, Kang did not put down and Mr. and Mrs. Liu lotus does not need river Feng saying that then the tactful pushing gate went out to wait. 闻言,康不平与刘莲夫妇不用江枫多说,便识趣的推门出去等候。 After they go out, river Feng then looks to reckless gold/metal ikebana: „Ms. reckless, through your beforehand narration, I listens to you to oneself daughter-in-law truly is very discontented, dislikes the daughter-in-law not to understand to manage a household, cannot get used to seeing daughter-in-law's all sorts of behaviors, perhaps your original intention is good for them, but stands in my angle, I think that you made the mistake!” 等他们出去后,江枫便看向胡金花道:“胡女士,通过你之前的讲述,我听出你对自己的儿媳确实是很不满,嫌儿媳不懂持家,看不惯儿媳的种种行为,或许你的本意是为了他们好,但站在我的角度,我认为你做错了！” reckless Jinhua somewhat refuses to accept saying: „Grandmaster river, you said where my was wrong?” 胡金花有些不服道:“江大师,你说说我哪里错了？” „Ms. reckless, as the saying goes ‚first ten years sees the woman, the post- ten years see daughter-in-law’, this saying you should be have heard?” “胡女士,俗话说‘前十年看婆,后十年看媳’,这话你应该是听说过的吧？” river Feng looks at reckless Jinhua, said lightly: „ The first ten years can be said as of the bride is most difficult most needs to help, she is newly-arrived, is unfamiliar with the people and place, a person all alone, the crowd of environment and contact of life is different, beginning her the manner woman, is the daughter-in-law initially, becomes a mother, all start from the beginning. 江枫看着胡金花,淡淡说道:“头十年可以说是新媳妇最困难最需要帮助的时候,她初来乍到,人生地不熟,一个人无依无靠的,生活的环境与交往的人群都不一样,她初为人妇,初为人媳,初为人母,一切都是从头开始。 At this time, as mother -in-law, should multi- in addition forgive and contain, helped the daughter-in-law integrate this family with every effort. 这个时候,作为婆婆,理应多加体谅和包容,尽力帮助儿媳融入这个家庭。 For example food habit, since you do do not conform to her taste, but she will not do, she selects to go eats you should not be extremely harsh. 比如说饮食习惯,既然你做得不符合她的口味,而她自己又不会做,那她点个外卖吃你也不要太过苛刻。 Moves to locate, if you are the daughter-in-law she are the woman, she does is the local horseradish, but you could not eat spicily, yourself spent to go eat, she must accuse you to spend randomly, what taste were you? ” 易地而处,如果你是儿媳她是家婆的话,她做的都是本地辣菜,而你又吃不了辣,你自己花钱点个外卖吃,她又要指责你乱花钱,你心里是什么滋味？” reckless Jinhua hears a silence, in the heart many also somewhat to touch, after all she is also many years of wife cooks down the woman, actually some are difficult she also to realize as the daughter-in-law. 胡金花听得一阵默然,心中多少也有些触动,毕竟她也是多年媳妇熬成婆,作为儿媳究竟有多难她也是体会过的。 In the past she felt unendurablily most suffering, pledged in the heart secretly, in the future will certainly not feel embarrassed the wife, will not be wronged by own wife. 当年她最难熬感到最委屈的时候,就在心中暗暗发誓,将来一定不会为难媳妇,不会让自己的媳妇受委屈。 After may waits for her really to become mother -in-law, that the mothers and daughters-in-law should conflict same will appear...... 可等她真的成为婆婆以后,婆媳该出现的冲突还是一样会出现…… „Is the belt/bring child, this absolutely is in the mothers and daughters-in-law issue ranked the first contradictory. According to narration of your daughter-in-law, you, when she passes first month after childbirth, although handled a lot, but she actually does not buy your tack, why do you know?” “还有就是带孩子,这绝对是婆媳问题中排名第一的矛盾点。根据你儿媳的讲述,你在她坐月子的时候,虽然做了很多事情,但她却不领你的情,你知道为什么吗？” river Feng does not need she to reply, said the answer directly, „, because you work have not looked to the direction, therefore does again many is also useless, what at that time you should do is the multi- belt/bring child, making your daughter-in-law be able to rest well, recovers. 江枫不待她回答,就直接说出了答案,“因为你做事没找对方向,所以做得再多也是白搭,那个时候你应该做的是多带孩子,让你的儿媳能够好好休息,恢复身体。 Rather than daily flower lots of time do grocery shopping to prepare food and clean up. ” 而不是每天花大量的时间去买菜做饭和打扫卫生。” reckless Jinhua whole face grievance said: „At that time the child was little, ate to the full resting, awoke eating, how did not need to bring, going of my thinking of every means did delicious to her, making her body be able soon to restore, can this also blame me?” 胡金花满脸委屈道:“那个时候孩子小,吃饱了睡,睡醒了吃,根本不用怎么带,我是费尽心思的去给她做好吃的,让她的身体能够早日恢复,这也能怪我？” river Feng sighed: „ Ms. reckless, this is two generations of concept difference, is the difference of time, in the past you passed first month after childbirth, perhaps not only wanted to lead the child, might handle other things. 江枫叹道:“胡女士,这就是两代人的观念差异,也是时代的差异,当年你坐月子的时候,或许不仅仅要自己带孩子,可能还要做其他事情。 Therefore, your daughter-in-law passes first month after childbirth, you complete all things, helps the belt/bring belt/bring child, felt that this has achieved was best, the daughter-in-law should be grateful to you, rather than complaint. 所以,你儿媳坐月子,你把所有事情都做完,有空还帮忙带带孩子,感觉这样已经做到最好了,儿媳对你应该感恩戴德,而不是埋怨。 This cannot say you to be wrong, can only say that you have not grasped daughter-in-law's thoughts. 这不能说你错,只能说你没把握住儿媳的心思。 This truth to preparing food to be the same, you are big table of guests the vegetable/dish that likes eating not to come out laboriously, the role that plays have not compared only to make the meal that the guest likes together. ” 这个道理就跟做菜一样,你辛辛苦苦做一大桌客人不爱吃的菜出来,起到的作用还比不上只做一道客人喜欢的菜。” reckless Jinhua just started not to understand what is heard, behind that preparing food analogy until hearing, is suddenly enlighted. 胡金花刚开始没听明白,直到听到后面那个做菜的比喻,才恍然大悟。 „ Is the mothering concept, this is the contradictory disaster area, the mothers and daughters-in-law cannot get used to seeing each other to have child's way, as well as to the thought that the child inculcates, or was brings not to record the graciousness completely, the belt/bring was not good only then accused and scolds. “还有就是育儿观念,这也是矛盾重灾区,婆媳互相看不惯对方带孩子的方式,以及给孩子所灌输的思想,又或者是带好了完全不记恩,带不好又只有指责和数落。 The daughter-in-law must not exposed to mother -in-law's spoiling to child, mother -in-law must not exposed to the daughter-in-law to the child severe wait/etc. 儿媳见不得婆婆对孩子的溺爱,婆婆见不得儿媳对孩子的严厉等等。 This is the problem that many families can have, mothers and daughters-in-law both sides can only forgive and contain mutually, after all goal of both sides is consistent, is good for the child. ” 这是很多家庭都会存在的问题,婆媳双方只能互相体谅和包容,毕竟双方的目标是一致的,都是为了孩子好。” At this point, river Feng felt that also said similarly, then did final summarized: „Ms. reckless, you must remember such a few words in brief: First ten years see the woman, the post- ten years see the daughter-in-law, if you help me be young, I make you old surely, if you bully me to be young, I make you not have to depend on surely.” 说到这里,江枫感觉也说得差不多了,便作最后的总结道:“胡女士,总之你要牢记这样的一句话:前十年看婆,后十年看媳,你若帮我年少无知,我定让你年老无忧,你若欺我年少无知,我定让你老无所依。” These words, river Feng said loud and clear, reckless Jinhua hears the look to change countenance. 这句话,江枫说得掷地有声,胡金花听得神色动容。 Off topic 题外话 Excuse me, late. Thank hitting of book friend Something went wrong big shot to enjoy. 不好意思,迟了点。感谢书友[Not Found]大佬的打赏。