Spring Festival continues. 春晚继续。 World Chinese one match full of energy. 全球华人都一个赛一个的精神抖擞。 In the past Spring Festival broadcast here time, because the reason of ordinary biological clock, because of the reason of overseas time difference, many people have been stranded, some people could not notice that behind could not wait for the New Year bell to sound, ahead of time has rested, is different this year, time was very already late, but all audience actually eyes before television shone, nobody gave up the line of sight moves away from the television, did not have! 往年春晚播到这里的时候,因为平常生物钟的原因,因为海外时差的原因,很多人都已经困了,有人看不到后面也等不到新年钟声敲响,就提前去休息了,可是今年不一样,时间已然很晚了,可电视机前的所有观众却都眼睛放光,没有一个人舍得把视线从电视机上拿开,一个都没有！ Too attractive! 太好看了！ This Spring Festival his mother is poisonous! 这届春晚他娘有毒啊！ Looked unable to stop! 看了就停不下来啊！ Hurry up, what program does below have? 快点啊,下面还有什么节目？ In a big hurry in a big hurry, could not wait! 快快快快,等不了了！ Right, Crosstalk? Spring Festival quick more than half, hasn't Crosstalk come? 对了,相声呢？春晚都快过半了,相声还没来吗？ Language class program is people most had anticipated, now, all program types basically appeared, the dance, the song, the acrobatics, the magic, Sketch, and so on, has not appeared on Crosstalk program from beginning to end, many people are also anticipating this moment arrival. 语言类节目一直都是众人最期待的,现在为止,所有节目类型基本上都出现了,舞蹈,歌曲,杂技,魔术,小品,等等等等,就相声节目自始至终还没有出现,很多人也都在期待这一刻的到来。 ...... …… On screen. 屏幕上。 Host announced. 主持人报幕。 Finally, first Crosstalk program came! 终于,第一个相声节目来了！ Spring Festival is this, is fastidious about a whole, is fastidious about a rhythm, just «Thousand Hand Goddess of Mercy» and «In the Spring» has deceived tears of many person, is impossible to let everybody greatly new year's celebration immersion of continuously in the moved mood, at this time must certainly present a language class program mediation atmosphere, but comedy program that at this time presented especially was essential, especially was not good to develop, was not true strength program, was very difficult to blow the field, very difficult to clutch to come out before the mood everybody! 春晚就是这样,讲究一个整体,讲究一个节奏,刚刚的《千手观音》和《春天里》骗了很多人的眼泪,就不可能让大家大过年的一直沉浸在伤感的情绪中,这个时候肯定要出现一个语言类节目调解氛围了,而这个时候出现的喜剧节目就尤为关键,也尤为的不好演,不是真正的实力节目,很难镇得住场,很难把大家从之前的情绪中揪出来！ But these, Zhang Ye naturally considered. 而这些,张烨自然都考虑到了。 This work, he is confident! 这部作品,他信心十足！ ...... …… Crosstalk. 相声界。 The group of some small group chatted. 某小圈子的群聊。 „These people are too characterless!” “这几个人太没骨气！” „Snort, Little Hu this young people, but Old Liu Old Li by Zhang Ye offering amnesty? Did they have the strength of spirit!” “哼,小胡这个年轻人也就算了,可老刘老李怎么也被张烨给招安了啊？他们还有没有骨气了！” „The Spring Festival olive branch, can others not meet?” “春晚的橄榄枝,人家能不接吗？” „Before Old Liu Old Li, but actually has not had the conflict with Zhang Ye, is they are intelligent, in the past Crosstalk denounced Zhang Ye time, they have not participated.” “老刘老李之前倒也没和张烨起过冲突,还是他们聪明啊,当年相声界声讨张烨的时候,他们都没参与。” „Looked that they can perform any Crosstalk.” “看他们能演出什么相声吧。” „Very.” “好不了。” „He He, Zhang Ye can write any tradition Crosstalk book!” “呵呵,张烨能写出什么传统相声本子来啊！” „Right, the Zhang Ye book too three were vulgar, cannot amount to something!” “对,张烨的本子都太三俗了,上不了台面！” ...... …… Online. 网上。 Also many people discussed. 也有不少人议论。 „Crosstalk comes!” “相声来啦！” „Were very long!” “等很久了啊！” „Is the Crosstalk book also Zhang Ye provides?” “相声本子也是张烨提供的？” „Right, is he.” “对,都是他。” „Can this?” “这能好吗？” „, Zhang Ye Crosstalk probably a little” “呃,张烨的相声好像都有点” „Yes, Spring Festival Crosstalk, can he also write?” “是啊,春晚的相声,他也能写？” „Who knows.” “谁知道呢。” „Crosstalk of 56 people? How did this say?” “56个人的相声吗？这怎么说啊？” „This Spring Festival first Crosstalk work, what has a look.” “这届春晚的第一个相声作品,看看什么样吧。” However, when Crosstalk live broadcast that moment, all people deeply were shocked! 然而,当相声直播的那一刻,所有人都被深深震惊了！ ...... …… On television. 电视上。 Captions emergence. 字幕出现。 Famous Crosstalk actor Li Xiangqi with a laugh go on stage. 著名相声演员李向奇笑呵呵地登场了。 Chubby his one is the happy expression, making the person look that wants to smile. 胖乎乎的他一身都是喜气,让人一看就想笑。 Li Xiangqi today in this Crosstalk, is „head that” plays. 李向奇今天在这段相声里,饰演的就是“脑袋”。 Head: „Yeah, I came saying that with everybody a matter, I had a dream last night, my this dream! Specially strange, I dream of my this five senses, from......” 脑袋:“哎,我来跟大家说个事儿啊,我昨晚作了个梦,我这梦啊！特别奇怪,我梦见我这五官啊,从……” Eye: „Yo! Head.” 眼睛:“哟！脑袋。” Head: „Yeah.” 脑袋:“哎。” Eye: „Ha Ha! Ha Ha!” 眼睛:“哈哈！哈哈！” Head: „Hello, hello!” 脑袋:“你好,你好！” Eye: „Do you also know me?” 眼睛:“您还认识我吗？” Head: „I do not dare to recognize! Can I have your name?” 脑袋:“我可不敢认啦！请问您贵姓啊？” Eye: „my name is the eye.” 眼睛:“我姓眼。” Head: „Surname...... What is surnamed?” 脑袋:“姓……姓什么？” Eye: „Is surnamed the eye.” 眼睛:“姓眼。” Head: „Does Hundred Family Surnames have your this surname?” 脑袋:“百家姓有你这姓吗？” Eye: „First.” 眼睛:“头一个就是啊。” Head: „Which sentence?” 脑袋:“哪句呀？” Eye: „Zhao Qiansun eyes.” 眼睛:“赵钱孙眼。” Head: „Has not heard! Zhao Qiansun eyes? Zhao Qiansun Li!” 脑袋:“没听说过！赵钱孙眼？赵钱孙李！” Eye: „, ZhouWu Zheng Yan!” 眼睛:“啊,周吴郑眼！” Head: „ZhouWu Zheng King.” 脑袋:“周吴郑王。” Eye: „Feng Chen Chuyan.” 眼睛:“冯陈楚眼。” Head: „Do not poke! You did not fear that the pestle is blind?” 脑袋:“你别杵啦！你不怕杵瞎啦？” Eye: „No, I......” 眼睛:“不,我……” Head: „Do you name?” 脑袋:“你叫什么名字吧？” Eye: „I called the eye.” 眼睛:“我叫眼睛。” Head: „Eye?” 脑袋:“眼睛？” Eye: „Yeah, right!” 眼睛:“哎,对对！” Head: „Oh, you said that this person has to be called the eye??” 脑袋:“哎呀,您说这人有叫眼睛的吗？啊？” Eye: „What did your this part call?” 眼睛:“那你这部分叫什么？” Head: „Do not trace! Touched badly, which matched this components to go?” 脑袋:“别摸！摸坏了,哪儿配这零件儿去呀？” Eye: „What did your this call?” 眼睛:“你这叫什么？” Head: „My this is the eye.” 脑袋:“我这是眼睛。” Eye: „I am your eye.” 眼睛:“我就是您的眼睛。” Before long, being heavily engaged that five senses go on stage, hit! 不一会儿,五官一个个登场,打的不可开交！ ...... …… Audience: 现场观众: „Hahahahaha!” “哈哈哈哈哈！” „It is not whoops good!” “哎呦不行啦！” „Funny!” “笑死人啦！” „My belly cramp!” “我的肚子抽筋啦！” „Hahahahaha!” “哈哈哈哈哈哈！” ...... …… Grandma. 姥姥家。 Mother covers the belly to smile to bend the waist. 老妈捂着肚子笑弯了腰。 Three younger sisters smile double with laughter. 三个妹妹笑得前仰后合。 „Pū!” “噗！” „Hahahaha!” “哈哈哈哈！” „Was too funny!” “太好笑了！” „My brother god!” “我哥神了啊！” ...... …… Online. 网上。 „fucking awesome!” “牛-逼！” „This Crosstalk I take!” “这相声我服！” „I am also, takes really!” “我也是,是真服啊！” „Does not have what network catch word, but really comedy!” “没有什么网络流行语,但是真搞笑啊！” „Form is also novel! But the language and burden are the traditional forms!” “形式也新颖！但语言和包袱都是传统形式的！” „Can Zhang Ye also write the traditional piece unexpectedly? Moreover his mother writes is so good?” “张烨居然也能写传统段子？而且还他妈写的这么好？” „Yes, I also think he will write these so-called ‚three vulgar pieces’!” “是啊,我还以为他就会写那些所谓的‘三俗段子’呢！” „Hahahahaha, attractive! This Crosstalk is fierce!” “哈哈哈哈哈,好看！这相声厉害啊！” „Originally tradition can also such comedy!” “原来传统的也能这么搞笑呀！” „Zhang Ye this is face-smacking Crosstalk!” “张烨这是打脸相声界啊！” „Whoops, smiles my tears to get down!” “哎呦,笑得我眼泪都下来啦！” ...... …… Crosstalk this moment silence. 相声界此刻一片寂静。 The Tang Dazhang calm face maintains total silence. 唐大章沉着脸一语不发。 Other cannot mount the traditional Crosstalk actors face of Spring Festival to be also green! 其他没能登上春晚的传统相声演员们脸也都绿了！ The picture of anticipation has not seen! 期待的画面并没有看到！ How possible! 怎么可能！ Is this Zhang Ye writes? 这是张烨写的？ Originally this type of book can he also write? 原来这种本子他也能写啊？ Originally he could not write to be able on Crosstalk of large-scale party!? 原来他不是写不了能上大型晚会的相声啊！？ The form is novel! 形式新颖！ Decides outstanding! 立意出众！ Smiles a frequency to leave! 笑点频出！ Positive health! 积极健康！ Even if Crosstalk these are leading the person of colored spectacles, could not discover any problem this in this Zhang Ye Crosstalk work is the most shocking matter! 哪怕相声界那些带着有色眼镜的人,也在这部张烨的相声作品中找不出任何毛病这就是最让人震惊的事了！ ...... …… Main control room. 主控室。 Little Wang claps to exclaim over, said in a low voice: „This Crosstalk, looked that one time smiles one time!” 小王拍手叫绝,低声道:“这相声,看一次笑死一次啊！” Ha Qiqi also on the quiet said: „Um, was too novel.” 哈齐齐也悄悄道:“嗯,太新颖了。” Nearby Zhang Ye heard them to talk in a low voice, in heart happy, novel? If makes them know, this Crosstalk program is actually his Earth dozens years ago on Spring Festival old cannot old Crosstalk, not know that they can be any expressions. 旁边的张烨听到了俩人低声的对话,心中不禁乐了出来,新颖？如果让她们知道,这相声节目其实是他那个地球几十年前春晚上老的不能再老的相声了,不知道她们会是个什么表情。 Must use any Crosstalk work regarding one's own this Spring Festival, Zhang Ye hesitant was very long, works were written by him, overrules one after another, does not think appropriately, finally, he clenches teeth, took to bring up the rear on this Spring Festival the Master work! 对于自己这届春晚要用什么相声作品,张烨犹豫了很久,一部部作品被他写出来,又一部一部地否决掉,都觉得不合适,最终,他还是一咬牙,将大师的作品拿出来在这届春晚上压阵了！ Ma Ji Master. 马季大师。 Five Senses Strive for Merit. 五官争功。 Today presents shockingly, won one piece to cheer! 今天惊艳亮相,赢得一片喝彩！