Auditorium. 大礼堂。 „judges Teacher?” “评委老师？” „Has been OK, the finals ended.” “可以了,决赛结束了。” „Good, the score has counted.” “好的,分数已经统计出来了。” „I announced that the champion of this year's Beijing couplets hung in front big game is...... Teacher Zhang Ye” “我宣布,今年的京城楹联大赛的冠军是……张烨老师” With Host one, the following audience burst into the warm applause, screamed applauds, below lived it up simply very much. By the chairman's podium player seat position, the players of many cultural federations also sincerely applauded to Zhang Ye, some also with a smile set upright the thumb not to have the means to him, Zhang Ye can handle everybody's praise, this was also these years a strangest couplets hung in front big game, why was strange? That also with saying, because complete topic by a Zhang Ye person answering, therefore this time Zhang Ye champion, but the second place and third, have not appeared from the start, other 49 players accumulate the zero completely 随着主持人一声,下面的观众都爆发了热烈的掌声,还有尖叫叫好的,下面简直热闹得很。就连主席台旁边的选手席位置,好多文联的参赛选手也都心服口服地给张烨鼓起了掌,有些还笑着给他竖了大拇指没办法,张烨当得起大家的赞誉,这也是这些年来最古怪的一次楹联大赛了,为什么古怪？那还用说啊,因为全部题目都被张烨一个人给答了,所以这次只有张烨一个冠军,而亚军和第三名,压根就没有出现,其他49个参赛选手全部积零分啊 Hasn't this been worth giving the applause? 这还不值得给掌声？ Hasn't this been worth everybody admiring? 这还不值得大家敬佩？ Only the big thunder anything movement, has not applauded 只有大雷没什么动作,没鼓掌 Zheng Anbang and Beijing Writer's Association many people of facial colors are not quite also good, an applause has not given Zhang Ye, one's own lowers the head at the one's own matter, the spirit is very small 郑安邦和京城作协的好多人也面色不太好,一点掌声都没有给张烨,都自己低头于自己的事,气量很小 Zhang Ye saw this, lets somebody cool off or calm down smiles. 张烨看到了这一幕,冷冷一笑。 The Female Host person said with a smile: „Asked Teacher Zhang to go on stage to receive an award.” 女主持人微笑道:“请张老师上台领奖吧。” Zhang Ye set out, circles side to walk to go on stage, smiled to two Host. 张烨起身,绕到了侧面走上台,对两个主持人笑了笑。 That side, Old Qian and another two judges have also come up, the awarding cup prepares ahead of time, but has prepared three, waits for the staff to take, Old Qian only took, another two second place third places could not use obviously, to be honest, they were also first time issue such prize of forcing outstanding heroes, a person ended oppressively all players by the overwhelming superiority, this was the couplets hung in front big game is unprecedented. 那边,钱老和另外两个评委也上来了,奖杯是提前准备好的,不过准备了三个,等工作人员拿上来,钱老只拿了其中一个,另外两个亚军季军明显是用不上了,说实话,他们也是第一次颁发这么力压群雄的一个奖,一个人以压倒性的优势完虐了所有选手,这还是楹联大赛史无前例的。 „Teacher Little Zhang, Congratulations.” Old Qian gives him the awarding cup. “小张老师,恭喜了。”钱老把奖杯给他。 Zhang Ye receives, said: „Thanks the affirmation of judges Teacher.” 张烨接过来,道:“谢谢评委老师们的肯定。” Old Qian said with a smile: „It is not our affirmations, this was you won the honor, moreover I Believe no one could say anything, this was most does not have the couplets hung in front big game champion of suspense” 钱老笑道:“不是我们的肯定,这是你赢得荣誉,而且我相信谁也说不出什么,这是最没有悬念的一次楹联大赛冠军了” The audiences are smiling, yes, most did not have one of the suspense really 观众都在笑,是啊,真的是最没悬念的一届了 Female Host humanity: „Teacher Zhang, did you speak two award-winning words expressing feelings?” 女主持人道:“张老师,您讲两句获奖感言吧？” „Um, you determined that makes me say?” Zhang Ye blinks the eye. “嗯,你们确定让我讲吗？”张烨眨巴眨巴眼睛。 The Male Host person, what did this have is definite? Doesn't the person of each prize say the words expressing feelings? Thank the friend, to thank the leader, to thank parents and so on? 男主持人呃了一声,这样还有什么确定不确定的？每个获奖的人不是都会说一说感言吗？感谢朋友、感谢领导、感谢父母之类的？ The Female Host person actually knows Zhang Ye this words what intent, „this......” 女主持人却知道张烨此话何意,“这个……” „Good that I said two.” Zhang Ye turns around to everybody, has stopped for one second, he said: „Before I remember,...... Some people said that I do cheat?” “好吧那我说两句。”张烨一转身面向大家,停顿了一秒钟,他道:“我记得之前……有人说我作弊？” The people smile again, when laughed. 众人再笑,都当笑话了。 Only remains Beijing Writer's Association these person of expressions to be unsatisfactory, the heart said that you didn't have? Passed you also to raise? Are you small-minded? 只剩京城作协的那些人表情不佳,心说你没完了？都过去了你还提啊？你怎么那么小肚鸡肠啊？ May in fact Zhang Ye be the person of being small-minded, certain people jump over do not think him to raise, this male servant more must raise, „I want to know that is I who who reported that also wants to ask before , on the stage said that Beijing Writer's Association comrade who I cheated, judges Teacher and comrades of cultural federation has not investigated thoroughly, finally also made me participate, why your to go on stage definitely said that I did cheat?” Has observed closely under the stage that Writer's Association youth, „can you with I apologize? Is this most basic politeness?” 可实际上张烨就是个小肚鸡肠的主儿,某些人越不想他提,这厮偏偏越要提起来,“我想知道是谁举报的我,也想问一问之前在台上说我作弊的那个京城作协的同志,评委老师们和文联的同志们都没有查清楚,最后也让我参赛了,为什么你一上台就那么肯定地说我作弊了？”一眼就盯住了台下那个作协的青年,“你是不是得跟我道个歉？这是最基本的礼貌吧？” The youth is black the face to observe closely him, paralysis, I apologize? Why 那青年黑着脸盯住他,麻痹,我道歉？凭什么啊 A cultural federation woman has a look at him, „Little Wu, you truly should give everybody to confess.” 文联一个妇女看看他,“小乌,你确实应该给大家交代一下。” „Apologized Little Wu.” Also the humanity of cultural federations: „This is live broadcast, everybody looks that in your onstage these words are truly improper, was too arbitrary, has also had the influence to others Teacher Zhang reputation, this was also Teacher Zhang Ye reversed the aspect, had proven his one's own has not cheated, otherwise the consequence was dreadful, your words, enough have ruined a person” “道个歉吧小乌。”又有一个文联的人道:“这是直播,大家都看着呢,你之前台上那些话确实很不妥,太武断了,对人家张老师的名声也造成了影响,这也就是张烨老师扭转了局面,证明了他自己没有作弊,不然后果不堪设想,就你那一番话,已经足够毁掉一个人了” That youth surnamed Wu does not go, closes one's eyes brazen-faced and shameless. 那个姓乌的青年就是不去,死皮赖脸地闭上眼。 Zhang Ye has smiled one, „today is the couplets hung in front big game, you did not apologize have not related, I delivered you an antithetical couplet.” 张烨笑了一声,“今儿是楹联大赛,你不道歉也没关系,我送你一首对联吧。” Delivers the antithetical couplet? 送对联？ At this time did you also deliver the antithetical couplet? 这时候你还送对联？ Everybody is a little in a daze, some curious Zhang Ye must say anything. 大家都有点发愣,也有些好奇张烨要说什么。 Zhang Ye next quarter access road: „Mouse does not have the size to call old.” Because called the mouse 张烨下一刻便道:“鼠无大小皆称老。”因为都叫老鼠 Next unites, Zhang Ye said with a smile: „Kameari is always female and male surnamed Wu”, because called the turtle 下一句联儿,张烨微笑道:“龟有雌雄总姓乌”因为都叫乌龟 That youth hear word surnamed Wu, almost spat blood three liters Zhang Ye your Uncle you to be too ruthless he air/Qi quickly is called the face green this to be live broadcast this is several hundred thousand people again looks that such scolded one's own in the presence of everyone? The youth wish one could to look for a crack to worm one's way into he to think that did not apologize does not apologize, can you be what kind of? But he actually forgot this person is not an average person, but was that dares to scold the leader to scold that notorious Zhang Ye person poisonous mouth malice of unit when the silver microphone Awards ceremony more poisonous publicly this flash, the youth somewhat regretted, paralysis, early knew this, I might as well came up the apology I 那姓乌的青年闻言,差点吐血三升张烨你大爷你丫太狠了啊他气得都快嗷嗷叫了脸都绿了这可是直播啊这可是几十万人再看着呢啊当众这么骂自己？青年恨不得找个地缝钻进去他本以为死活不道歉就不道歉了,你能怎么样啊？可他却忘了这个人不是一般人,而是那个在银话筒颁奖典礼时都敢公开骂领导骂单位的那个臭名昭著的张烨人毒嘴毒心更毒啊这一刹那,青年真的有些后悔了,麻痹,早知道这样,我还不如上去道歉呢啊我 The Male Host person listened to stay, „Teacher Zhang” 男主持人听呆了,“张老师” The Female Host person is not accidental, she knows the Zhang Ye misdeeds, but hurried to touch the Zhang Ye shoes with the foot calmly, dumbfounded said in a low voice: „Teacher you......” 女主持人却一点不意外,她知道张烨的劣迹,只是赶紧不动声色地拿脚碰了碰张烨的鞋子,低声哭笑不得道:“老师您……” The audiences were also ignorant 观众也懵了 But Zhang Ye has not calculated that continues saying: „This participation, is Beijing Writer's Association recommends me to come up, wins this championship, I must thank them, thanked sends me to support my Writer's Association unit, I also delivered an antithetical couplet.” Was saying a sentence, read directly, „ox head is happy lives Dragon Corner/Horn.” 可张烨还不算完,继续道:“这次的参赛,是京城作协推荐我上来的,获得这个冠军,我也要感谢他们,感谢选送我支持我的作协单位,我也送一首对联吧。”说着一顿句,直接念了,“牛头喜得生龙角。” This is very ordinary, everybody has not looked to have problems. 这句还挺平常的,大家没看出问题。 But the Zhang Ye second line makes everybody faint a piece, „how could dog mouth spits ivory” 可张烨的下联却让大家都晕倒一片,“狗嘴何曾吐象牙” Beijing Writer's Association leader and member: „......” 京城作协的领导和成员:“……” The people of cultural federation cover the mouth titter, thought that was too interesting, wicked that too scolded 文联的众人则掩嘴偷笑不已,觉得太有意思了,骂的太缺德了啊 Zhang Ye naturally must scold, this time participated to look from him, Beijing Writer's Association this group of person have not settled the good intention, everywhere created obstacles for one's own, everywhere played the cloudy move, Zhang Ye got a sudden inspiration, was almost given to destroy the reputation by them, was almost ruined the entertainer profession, stain that if cheated by where Zhang Ye on, he could not wash clean for a lifetime, was this big enmity? He naturally must recover the gathering place 张烨当然要骂,这次从他来参赛就看出来了,京城作协这帮人没有一个安了好心,处处刁难自己,处处玩阴招,要不是张烨灵机一动,差点就被他们给毁了名声,差点就被断送了艺人生涯,要是作弊的污点被安在张烨身上,他一辈子都洗不清啊,这是多大的仇？他自然要找回场子了 Curses at people? 骂人？ My his mother also has to scold 我他妈又不是没骂过 live broadcast? Scolded was you 直播怎么了？骂的就是你们 At this time, Beijing Vice-President Writer's Association Meng Dongguo does not know when walked from the backstage, heard Zhang Ye blatantly to their Writer's Association firing off, immediately flew into a rage, no matter also live broadcast, he grabbed a microphone shoulders under the stage and Zhang Ye, he also said: „Zhang Ye, can't you to the antithetical couplet? I also give you to set a topic, you listened to me, two apes broke in the wooden remote mountain, does the little ape also dare to the saw?” This first scroll has the harmonics, „to saw” for „antithetical couplet”, this is scolding Zhang Ye 这时候,京城作协副主席孟东国不知什么时候从后台走出来了,听到张烨公然对他们作协开炮,顿时勃然大怒,也不管直播不直播了,他抢下来一个话筒就在台下和张烨扛上了,他也道:“张烨,你不是能对对联吗？那我也给你出一个题目,你给我听好了,两猿断木深山中,小猴子也敢对锯？”这个上联是有谐音的,“对锯”又为“对句”,这是在骂张烨 Zhang Ye was happy, this first scroll he remembers search time has, immediately counter-attacks saying: „You also listened to me, in horse Xian full sludge, how the old bastard can leave hoof” the hoof to be equal to set the topic 张烨乐了,这个上联他记忆搜索的时候恰好有,当即反击道:“那你也给我听好了,一马陷足污泥中,老畜生怎能出蹄”出蹄等同出题 „Good” “好” „Right real attractive” “对的真漂亮” „Hahahaha was happy I” “哈哈哈哈乐死我了” „Teacher Zhang Ye god” “张烨老师神了啊” Some audiences people laugh to make noise 观众们有人不禁发笑出声 Meng Dongguo: „...... Mn) * mn” 孟东国:“……mn）*mn” Vice-President Meng the antithetical couplet skill is not deep, otherwise he early participated, therefore he to Zhang Ye this male servant, just take action was defeated from the start 孟副主席对联的功力没有那么深,不然他早参赛了,所以他压根对不过张烨这厮,刚一出手就败下阵来 But Zhang Ye has not let off him, „ you, since has set the topic, I also set a problem, 1,234,567 但张烨没有放过他,“您既然出题了,那我也出一道题,1234567 Well? 咦？ This what topic? 这什么题？ The couplets hung in front may little have the card on seven, can have the first scroll is also 12,345,678? Has forgotten a caret? 楹联可很少有卡在七上面的,要出上联也是12345678啊？怎么忘记了一个八字？ Then Zhang Ye has a look at him, „ to? I give you a second line, the filial piety Zhongxin liyi is inexpensive 然后张烨看看他,“对不出来？那我给您一个下联吧,孝悌忠信礼义廉 It is not right 不对啊 The second line is not right 下联也不对啊 Is the filial piety Zhongxin liyi inexpensive? Shame? Shame? 孝悌忠信礼义廉？耻呢？耻怎么没有？ Where may present has the fool, how many players there are to ponder over the moment, dumbfoundedly analyzed this antithetical couplet metaphor, „has the first scroll forgotten one? Were the second line few ` shame? This is...... Forgets( king) shameless eight? My perspiration” 可在场哪里有傻子啊,有几个参赛选手琢磨了片刻,就瞠目结舌地分析出了这个对联的隐喻,“上联忘记了一个？下联少去了一个‘耻,？这是……忘（王）八无耻？我汗” Tortoise? 王八？ Shameless? 无耻？ Did the Meng Dongguo lung almost explode with rage you surnamed Zhang to curse at people? 孟东国肺差点气炸了姓张的你丫骂人？ The Male Host person is streaming with sweat, hurries to mediate a quarrel saying: „Two Teacher, two Teacher, little said two, little said two, the camera also......” this is the writer curses at people does not have the dirty words 男主持人汗流浃背,慌忙劝架道:“两位老师,两位老师,都少说两句,少说两句,摄像机还……”这就是文人啊骂人都不带脏字的 Meng Dongguo does not manage, said to Zhang Ye directly: „This situation, you insulted Beijing Writer's Association blatantly, insulted our Writer's Association staff, did the insult recommend your unit? Good, good, I can put here the words now explicitly, your this person, even if the talent is good, our Beijing Writer's Association will not receive” 孟东国不管了,直接对张烨道:“这种场合,你公然辱骂京城作协,辱骂我们作协的工作人员,辱骂推荐你的单位？好,好啊,我现在可以明确地把话放在这里,你这种人,就算才华再好,我们京城作协也不会收” Your also did Evildoer first complain? 你们还恶人先告状了？ Did you also rationally all manage? 你们还头头是道全是理了？ You want to step on my time steps on my me to counter-attack you to start to press me with the major principle? Because you are the authoritative unit therefore all occupy the principle? Pulls your mother to be pale 你们想踩我的时候就踩我我一反击你们又开始拿大道理压我？就因为你们是权威单位所以就全都占理？扯你妈淡 In Zhang Ye, shook hand simply laughably the microphone, is looking at that or indignant or speechless Beijing Writer's Association person, he said final a few words, these words is a doggerel, the origin are famous Crosstalk performing artist Guo Degang of his world. The Guo Degang doggerel in the Zhang Ye world one certainly, disputed is very big, especially that scolded the Beijing TV Station leadership, has caused the critiques of many professionals, today what Zhang Ye elects was Old Guo's another well-known doggerel, after Guo Degang was rejected by Spring Festival the piece that wrote, had the flavor, was interesting. 张烨简直可笑之极,握了握手里的话筒,望着那一个个或气愤或无语的京城作协的人,他说了最后一段话,这段话是一首打油诗,来源是他那个世界的著名相声表演艺术家郭德纲。郭德纲的打油诗在张烨的世界可谓一绝,争议很大,尤其那个骂京城电视台领导的,引起了好多业内人士的批判,但张烨今天选的是老郭的另一首著名打油诗,是在郭德纲被春晚拒绝后写出来的段子,非常有味道,也非常有意思。 „North wind bone-chilling cold, fog haze haze. The maniac withered grass, is difficult to distinguish the wild shop tower. The plum blossom piece tailor, performs miserably outside wall. Ices the day such as the jade to build, a silver powder buries. Pushes the brocade quilt to tread snow white, will open mind little shows off cleverness, swims around Jiangchuan plan Jian Guilai, poem to become Jiu will still dislike the day after tomorrow narrowly.” “朔风凛冽,雾霭霾霾。颠狂衰草,难分辨野店楼台。梅花片似剪裁,凄凉尽在墙儿外。冰天如玉砌,银枝似粉埋。推锦被踏雪白,开眼界少卖乖,游遍江川策蹇归来,诗成酒后天地犹嫌窄。” Here, many people have not understood. 说到这里,好多人都没听懂。 This what poem? Doggerel? 这什么诗？打油诗吗？ Zhang Ye also meeting doggerel? They also are really first listening 张烨还会打油诗？他们还真是第一次听 However the Zhang Ye following poem, they have actually understood, laughs, „wind makes the bamboo sound to turn over to the dawn institute, the moon/month to move to the flowered shade according to the Yao step. Fills with quietly and beautifully, sighed floats lives completely is the fame and fortune is stupid.” Here, Zhang Ye narrowed the pupil to look to Meng Dongguo, looked to these Writer's Association people, „, and opened the bleary eyes, to your success or failure......” a sound track: „I do not like coming” 然而张烨下面的诗,他们却都听懂了,也都一个个哈哈大笑起来,“风弄竹声归晓院,月移花影照瑶阶。清幽满怀,叹浮生尽都是名利痴呆。”此处,张烨眯着眸子看向了孟东国,看向了那些作协的人,“且把醉眼微开,任凭你兴衰成败……”哈了一声道:“我也不爱来” Don't you like coming? 你也不爱来？ They just said that won't make you join a society you to come such a doggerel? 他们刚说不会让你入会你就来了这么一首打油诗？ Hahaha good I not to like coming many audiences to give the hear all of a sudden happily( 哈哈哈好一个我也不爱来好多观众一下子都给听乐了( …… ……