Sixth day of the lunar New Year. 大年初六。 The sky is cloudy. 天空阴沉沉的。 Will not shine the bright time from the weather, has started to hike up the flurry, by around 8 : 00 am, the snowflake of big piece sprinkles in abundance, the revolving whereabouts on the street, spread out light white to the ground. 从天色将亮未亮的时候,就已经开始飘起小雪,到早上 8 点多,大片的雪花纷纷洒洒,旋转着落在街道上,给地面铺上一层薄薄的白色。 The old snow, the fresh snow has not accumulated. 旧雪未化,新雪又积。 The pharmacy entrance stops a white Audi, just stop, the vehicle door was then shoved open, Qin Guanglin carries a white bag half step to enter inside. 大药房门口停下一辆白色奥迪,刚刚停稳,车门便被推开,秦广林拎着一个白色袋子快步走进里面。 „Hello, I want to trouble you to help look that what sickness this treats?” “你好,我想麻烦您帮忙看一下这是治什么病的？” The doctor before medicine-chest raised the head, took a look at young people who stood in the front whole face feeling of weariness, have not visited him to place the medicine on counter, lowers the head saying: „Isn't your medicine?” 药柜前的医师抬头,瞅了一眼站在面前满脸倦意的年轻人,没看他放在柜台上的药,重新低下头道:“不是你的药吗？” „It is not.” “不是。” A Qin Guanglin whole evening is not at heart steadfast, if some labels said fortunately, the label on medicine bottle was torn up, but also hides such tightly, unavoidably makes him think. 秦广林心里一整晚都不踏实,如果有标签还好说,药瓶上的标签都被撕掉,还藏这么紧,难免让他多想。 More ponders over more lacks self-confidence at heart, when with great difficulty around 7 : 00 the estimate pharmacies soon open the door, carries the medicine to go out immediately, the peripheral medicine shop of result big new year's celebration has not opened, he is driving to saunter the half of the day, seeks here. 越琢磨心里越没底,好不容易等到七点多估计药房快要开门,立马拎着药出门,结果大过年的周边药铺都没开,他开着车转悠半天,才寻到这里。 „You asked person who takes a drug, this issue is not compliant, I do not have the means to tell you.” “那你去问吃药的人,这种问题不合规,我没办法告诉你。” „......” “……” Qin Guanglin builds the hand before counter to make an effort slightly, the nail was pressed to have flake white, silent one turns head to go to elsewhere, stopped, „I must buy exactly the same medicine, comes one set.” 秦广林搭在柜台前的手微微用力,指甲被按出一小片白色,沉默一下扭头想要去别处,顿了顿又停下,“我要买一模一样的药,都来一套。” The doctor heard that speaks discreetly to raise the head newly, knits the brows: „Your this............” 医师闻言重新抬起头来,皱眉道:“你这……啧……” „Helps...... thank you.” A Qin Guanglin face visits her sincerely, „this person is very important to me, I worried very much, even if you do not tell me now, I go to other place always to ask, wants to know they are govern anything......” “帮帮忙……谢谢您。”秦广林一脸诚恳地看着她,“这个人对我很重要,我很担心,您就算现在不告诉我,我去别的地方总能问出来,就是想知道它们是治什么……” „Others said that is others' matter, I have my professional ethics.” The doctor waves to break, the vision actually falls to him places the medicine on medicine-chest, the eye narrows the eyes, sees Qin Guanglin to turn around to want, hesitant one shouts: „Wait......” “别人说是别人的事,我有我的职业操守。”医师挥手打断,目光却不由落到他放在药柜上的药,眼睛微眯,见秦广林转身欲走,犹豫一下又喊道:“等等……” „Un?” “嗯？” „The person who you said that is what person your?” “你说的这个人,是你什么人？” „...... My wife.” “……我老婆。” „What makes?” The doctor asked these words, saw the Qin Guanglin brow slightly pressed, added: „I want to ask, is the hospital goes to work?” “做什么的？”医师问出这句话,见秦广林眉头微蹙,又补充道:“我就是想问问,是不是医院上班的？” A Qin Guanglin heart sinks slowly, shakes the head saying: „It is not, she is the teacher.” He, looked to the medicine bottle and pill that in the hand raise, catches the eye to look to the doctor, „what issue does this medicine...... have?” 秦广林一颗心缓缓下沉,摇头道:“不是,她是做老师的。”他顿了顿,看向手里提的药瓶和药片,又抬眼看向医师,“这药……有什么问题吗？” „Issue...... is a little.” Should the doctor say in the hesitation. “问题……是有一点。”医师在犹豫该不该说。 If the normal other medicines, she looked that did not look, where likes going to ask where asked that concerns the patient privacy the matter is a bottom line. 如果是正常的一些其它药,她连看都不看,爱去哪问去哪问,关乎病人隐私的事是底线。 But the present is the exception. 但现在是例外。 Pours to watch the pill in medicine bottle, she supposes in surplus quantity, the complexion is even more serious, is on the rise saying: „This...... is the sleeping pill.” 把药瓶里的药片倒出来看看,她又估摸一下里面剩余的数量,脸色愈发严肃,抬起头道:“这个……是安眠药。” „Is only the sleeping pill?” Qin Guanglin gawked staring, later relaxes, is hanging the heart puts slowly. “只是安眠药？”秦广林愣了愣,随后松了一口气,一颗悬着的心慢慢放下来。 Sleeping pill, although this thing frequently and suicide relation in together, but Teacher He...... possible? 安眠药而已,虽然这个东西经常和自杀联系在一块儿,但何老师……可能吗？ Absolutely does not have the least bit possibility. 完全没有半点可能。 „Thank you, really thanks.” “谢谢您,真的谢谢。” He nods to express gratitude, the doctor has not actually paid attention, puts out a hand to take up other other medicines, traces has a look, ignites with the finger said: „Shu Le stabilizes, this should be estazolam......” 他点头道谢,医师却没理会,伸手拿起另外的其它药,摸摸看看,拿手指点着道:“舒乐安定,这个应该是艾司唑仑……” „Is the prescription drug, besides help sleep, can be used to alleviate anxiously, frightened and anxious......” “都是处方药,除了帮助睡眠以外,也可以用于缓解焦虑、恐惧、紧张……” „...... Now is strict to control of sleeping pill, generally comes according to the grain, ten grains, 20 grains...... no one dares directly to one entire bottle, this bottle to be the entire 100 grains, therefore I asked that your patient is what occupation, is the hospital goes to work, the words of teacher...... I do not know one entire bottle how she buys......” “……现在对安眠药的把控非常严格,一般都是按粒来开,十粒,二十粒……没人敢直接给一整瓶,这一瓶是整整一百粒,所以我问你病人是什么职业,是不是医院上班的,老师的话……我不知道她是怎么买到的一整瓶……” „......, moreover this bottle has been short of similar half, these other medicines, was eaten, like this, the addictive nature is very high, generally really does not have the means time can eat, this board was only short of two pieces luckily......” “……而且这瓶已经少了差不多一半,还有这些其他药,也都被吃了一些,像这个,成瘾性很高,一般都是实在没办法的时候才能吃,幸好这一板只少了两片……” „...... This bag medicine is the stable, independent doctor definitely cannot open, if not this, I will not say so many......, if she hides the truth from you to eat quietly, this situation......” “……这一袋子药全都是安定,单独一个医生肯定是开不出来的,如果不是这样,我也不会说这么多……如果她是瞒着你悄悄吃的,这情况……” ...... …… „Mother, I must go to He City.” “妈,我要去一趟河城。” „, So to be how anxious? You......” “诶,诶,怎么这么急？你……” Bang. 砰。 Qin Guanglin to go out with the good clothes directly, enters starts the vehicle to the car(riage). 秦广林拿好衣服直接出门,进到车里发动车子。 Now spring festival transportation return trip time, half ticket cannot snatch, can only drive. 现在正是春运返程的时候,半张票都抢不到,只能开车过去。 The glass starts out a seam, the bone-chilling cold cold wind whiz whiz infiltrated, making him shrink the neck, the train of thought tumbled in the mind unceasingly, is mixing with the words of doctor. 车窗开出一条缝,凛冽的寒风嗖嗖钻进来,让他缩了缩脖子,思绪在头脑里不断翻滚,夹杂着医师的话语。 Randomly. 乱。 Very randomly. 很乱。 Qin Guanglin has not thought that optimistic open He Fang, has smiled to tease his He Fang all day, always laughing foolishly to hang He Fang on face- 秦广林从没想到过,一直乐观开朗的何妨,整天笑眯眯逗他的何妨,总把傻笑挂在脸上的何妨- Her info clerk bottom level can hide one pile stably...... some also to be eaten most probably. 她的收纳箱底层会藏着一堆安定……有些还被吃了大半。 Losing sleep? 失眠？ Anxious? 焦虑？ ...... 还是…… If not he starts the reorganization room...... a feeling of lingering fear to well up for a while. 如果不是他一时兴起整理房间……一阵后怕的感觉涌上心头。 Luckily morning of discovery. 幸好发现的早。 Qin Guanglin knits the brows the parking, fishing out the cell phone wants first to telephone to He Fang, looks that the cell phone also hesitated, since is hiding the truth from him, in that telephone definitely cannot ask anything, must meet is good. 秦广林皱眉停车,摸出手机想给何妨先打个电话,看着手机又犹豫了,既然瞒着他,那电话里肯定问不出什么,还是得见面才行。 Lives together over six months, he actually does not have to think...... 一起同居半年多,他竟然毫无所觉…… As boyfriend, dereliction of duty. 作为男朋友,失职。 Very dereliction of duty. 非常失职。 Restarts the vehicle, Qin Guanglin acts suddenly, is looking at each other with rear view mirror, what in the head flashes through was the past all sorts. 重新启动车子,秦广林忽然动作一顿,与后视镜里的自己对视着,脑袋里闪过的是以往的种种。 „I cannot fall asleep, you will come in...... to get out of bed tomorrow earlier well......” “我睡不着,你进来吧……明天早点起床就好了……” „...... Did Schoolmate Qin, you rest?” “……秦同学,你睡了吗？” „Recently a little losing sleep......” “最近有点失眠……” „...... Cannot fall asleep, thinks you very much.” “……睡不着,很想你。” The He Fang sound circles in the heart, the vehicle thunders is expunging in the He City direction. 何妨的声音在心底盘旋,车子轰鸣着往河城的方向开去。 Qin Guanglin wants to understand finally, before living together , about 10 : 00 pm has helped her pass/test Haodeng say good night obviously, when next day actually 22 points she wakes up to have the breakfast. 秦广林终于想明白了,同居前明明每天晚上十点左右就已经帮她关好灯说过晚安,第二天却等到十一二点她才醒来吃早餐。 Do some people rest every day for over 12 hours? 有人每天睡超过十二个小时吗？ Perhaps occasionally will have, but few individuals daily this. 也许偶尔会有,但没几个人天天这样。 He closely is pinching the steering wheel, the knuckle already some blanches, suddenly opened in a big way a point the glass slit, the chill in the air welled up in a twinkling crazily from the car(riage), let his mind immediately a clear, investigated the mixed train of thought to be swept away, another issue braved from the bottom of the heart. 他紧紧捏着方向盘,指节已有些发白,忽的又把车窗缝隙开大了一点,寒意霎时间从车外疯狂涌进来,让他头脑顿时一清,纠杂的思绪被横扫,另一个问题又从心底冒出来。 After living together, whole time are He Fang first rest, have not had the sign of being able to fall asleep. 同居后,大部分时间都是何妨先睡,丝毫没有过睡不着的迹象。 This...... 这…… Has the issue. 有问题。 The medicine is impossible to emerge out of thin air, is impossible to vanish baseless one less than half, possibly does not help the friend receive. 药不可能凭空出现,也不可能凭空消失一小半,更不可能是帮朋友收的。 The friends have the losing sleep problem words, why to make her help take? 朋友有失眠的毛病的话,干嘛让她帮忙拿？ „Is the prescription drug, besides help sleep, can be used anxiously, frightened and anxious......” “都是处方药,除了帮助睡眠以外,也可以用于焦虑、恐惧、紧张……” The words of doctor appear near the ear, driving Qin Guanglin pulls out at heart fiercely. 医师的话语又浮现在耳边,开着车的秦广林心里猛地一抽。 Anxious...... frightened...... anxious...... 焦虑……恐惧……紧张…… What does she in fear? 她在恐惧什么？