Around 8 : 00 pm. 晚上 8 点多。 He City has not snowed, the chilly moonlight sprinkles on the street, each and every family is turning on a light, once for a while has the laughter to spread. 河城没有下雪,清冷的月色洒在街道上,家家户户亮着灯,时不时有笑声传出。 A cheerful atmosphere of school of new year's celebration. 一派过年的欢快氛围。 Whole evening has not had a good sleep, drives an overhead traveling crane to arrive at He City Qin Guanglin tired to sit in the car(riage), the glass is opening, he calmly looks at the dim light of night of out of the window, has not come up immediately. 整晚没睡好,又开一天车到达河城的秦广林一脸疲惫地坐在车里,车窗打开着,他静静看着窗外的夜色,没有立刻上去。 The night wind is blowing slowly, builds strikes in the steering wheel above finger one by one gently. 夜风徐徐吹着,搭在方向盘上面的手指一下一下地轻轻敲打。 As a teacher, what does she in fear? 身为一个老师,她在恐惧什么？ Every day teaches to teach, writes, gets off work to do grocery shopping to prepare food, is all right looked together a movie window-shops. 每天教教书,写写,下班买菜做饭,没事一起看个电影逛逛街。 What is she in anxious? 她在焦虑什么？ Qin Guanglin side looked at black bag on a copilot, thoughts are tumbling to investigate at heart mixed. 秦广林侧头看了一眼副驾驶上的黑色袋子,一个个念头在心里翻滚纠杂。 He feared that He Fang does not speak the truth. 他怕何妨不说实话。 How must think to open the mouth well is- or...... draws her to go to the hospital directly? 得好好想想怎么开口才是-或者……直接拉她去医院？ Was the recollection in those days in the tranquility and indifference of He Fang, his cold air faint trace braved upward. 越是回想往日里何妨的平静与淡然,他心里寒气丝丝地往上冒。 Suicides despondently, is always these people in whisper, if kicks up a fuss says, instead also many. 抑郁寻死的,从来都是那些悄默声的人,如果大吵大闹地说出来,反而还更好些。 Is the camouflage calmly, then more can be painful. 越是伪装的若无其事,便越会痛苦。 Two people when together tip appears unceasingly at present, Qin Guanglin is lost in thought. 两人在一起时的点点滴滴不断浮现在眼前,秦广林正出神时。 Sincere. 笃笃。 Sincere. 笃笃笃。 Another side glass was sounded. 另一侧玻璃被敲响。 He Fang wears the thick down clothing to stand outside the car(riage) searches to look toward. 何妨穿着厚厚的羽绒服站在车外往里探瞧着。 „How did you come?!” “你怎么过来了？！” The vehicle door opens, on her face brings the pleasant surprise and surprised, the eye opens the eyes in a big way, selects the eyebrow to look at Qin Guanglin slightly, bends down to drill toward the car(riage), „just thinks you, kisses/intimate......” 车门打开,她脸上带着惊喜与惊讶,眼睛睁得大大的,微微挑眉看着秦广林,俯身往车里钻去,“正想你呢,来亲……” The words live. 话语顿住。 Qin Guanglin looks toward below following the He Fang line of sight, her hand positive pressure in that thinks in the plastic bag of medicine bottle, two board pills have scattered. 秦广林顺着何妨视线往下面看去,她的手正压在那装着药瓶的塑料袋上,两板药片已经散落出来。 „......” “……” „......” “……” Sees on the He Fang face the smile hidden to go, Qin Guanglin inexplicably at heart one nervous, lowers the head to knock to stumble two, said: „How that...... did you get down?” 见何妨脸上笑容隐去,秦广林莫名心里一慌,低下头磕绊两下,道:“那个……你怎么下来了？” The feeling of this peeping person privacy is very uncomfortable. 这种窥人隐私的感觉真的很难受。 Perhaps...... he should guide her bit by bit to confess slowly is better, rather than lays cards on the table like the present suddenly, told her probably: I have known that your matter, now is asks you to ascertain. 或许……他应该慢慢引导着她一点一点坦白才更好,而不是像现在这样忽然摊牌,就好像告诉她:我已经知道你的事了,现在就是来找你问清楚的。 No one hopes oneself are sick, this cannot be controlled, since He Fang the choice conceals, that does not want to make him know that she has the issue, wanting oneself to solve secretly. 没有人希望自己有病,这不是可以受人控制的,何妨既然选择隐瞒,那就是不想让他知道她有问题,想要自己一个人偷偷解决。 Now he actually lifts that matter to obstruct the arrange/cloth directly, makes her matter confess directly under the broad daylight- he thought that this is also an injury. 现在他却直接掀开了那层遮布,直接让她的事坦白在光天化日之下-他觉得这也是一种伤害。 Sees He Fang to lower the head has not spoken, Qin Guanglin is just about to continue to open the mouth, actually sees her body to shrink gets in the car(riage), takes the vehicle door conveniently, then one medicine stopper on seat throws the back seat carelessly, takes a look glass that by him opens greatly. 见何妨低头没说话,秦广林正要继续开口,却见她身子一缩就钻进车里,顺手带上车门,然后把座椅上的药胡乱塞一下扔到后座,瞅瞅他旁边大开的车窗。 „I am cold, closes the window.” “我冷,把窗户关上。” „Oh.” “哦。” „Originally wants to draw in the window curtains to prepare to lie down, sees this car(riage) in the window, the feeling is you, I under come to see.” “本来想拉上窗帘准备躺下了,在窗边看到这辆车,感觉是你,我就下来看看。” He Fang is saying calmly, without asked how again he came, both hands pester to make an effort to rub the moment together slightly, purses the lips saying: „Don't you kiss my one? So many days have not seen......” 何妨若无其事地说着,没再问他怎么过来了,双手纠缠在一起微微用力揉搓片刻,抿嘴道:“你不亲我一下吗？这么多天没见……” Qin Guanglin has carefully observed the appearance that she spoke, where trying to discover is not right, hears here heart inexplicable loosen, is hesitating by the past. 秦广林一直仔细观察她说话的样子,试图找出哪里不对,听到这里心头莫名一松,犹豫着靠过去。 When without meeting all that lets one's thoughts wander, probably is the misconception is the same, at present sees her honorable person, he wants to overthrow the beforehand guess subconsciously, such mild will Teacher He possibly depend on the medicine to maintain the livelihood daily? 没见面时乱想的一切,好像都是错觉一样,眼下见到她的真人,他下意识就想推翻之前的猜测,这么温润的何老师怎么可能会天天靠药物维持生活？ Can a person of anxious frightened losing sleep, be this appearance? 一个焦虑恐惧失眠的人,会是这副模样吗？ He cannot make up mind, 他心里拿不定主意, Long time. 良久。 Lip difference. 唇分。 Qin Guanglin and He Fang look at each other silently, no one has started talking, wants from discover anything to the square features. 秦广林与何妨默默对视,谁也没有开口说话,都想从对方脸上找出什么。 „You come, because of that?” “你来,就是因为那个吗？” Finally He Fang first broke silent, puts out a hand to refer to being thrown the bag of back seat by her. 最后还是何妨先打破了沉默,伸手指指被她扔到后座的袋子。 „...... All is not.” “……不全是。” „Un?” “嗯？” „Also thinks you.” “还想你。” „I know.” He Fang smiled gently, looked that his two eyes lower the head, the finger pinches the lower hem corner to buckle the lane gently, the peaceful moment has not heard Qin Guanglin to speak, has to say sluggishly: „These medicines...... un...... truly are I eat......” “我就知道。”何妨轻轻笑了,看他两眼又低下头去,手指捏着衣角轻轻扣弄,安静片刻没听到秦广林说话,只好慢吞吞道:“那些药……嗯……确实是我吃的……” Has not greeted to open one with her the car(riage) to catch up directly all day, explained that Qin Guanglin has known that is any medicine, will conceal will only deepen the suspicion of his heart, will in turn cause more issues, might as well confess directly. 没和她打招呼直接开一整天车赶过来,说明秦广林已经知道那都是些什么药,隐瞒只会加深他心底的怀疑,进而引发更多问题,不如直接坦白。 Moreover now has been all right, even if said still no- she has not eaten for a long time again, has wallowed in two people in the together day, has almost forgotten it in the corner, if were not turned suddenly...... 而且现在已经没事了,就算说出来也没什么-她已经很长时间没再吃过,一直沉迷于两个人在一起的日子,几乎都已经把它遗忘在角落,如果不是忽然被翻出来…… „Losing sleep?” Qin Guanglin asked. “失眠吗？”秦广林问。 „Un...... is.” “嗯……是。” „Very serious?” “很严重？” „Is, but is now good, you visit me to rest daily in the evening, not?” He Fang smiles toward him, the look falls to the back seat on, „before is mainly , before the school graduates the pressure is quite big...... is a little anxious, afterward after graduating moves, was all right slowly, now 1 : 00 issue does not have, these medicines can discard.” “算是吧,不过现在已经好了,你天天晚上看着我睡的,不是吗？”何妨朝他笑笑,眼神又落到后座上,“主要是之前在学校毕业前压力比较大……还有点焦虑,后来毕业搬出来以后就慢慢没事了,现在一点问题也没有,那些药可以扔掉了。” Qin Guanglin listens to her words to relax slightly, had not actually felt relieved completely, before graduating , the pressure big...... this reason is a little forced. 秦广林听着她的话语稍稍松了口气,却还没完全放心,毕业前压力大……这个理由有点牵强。 That how many months are they just started, if the pressure is big, how to associate smoothly, but also has teased him? 那几个月是他们刚刚开始的时候,如果压力大,怎么会这么顺利地交往,还一直逗他？ Is this reduced pressure way? 难道这是一种减压方式？ A little odd. 有点离谱。 „Really is this? Why hadn't said with me?...... I thought that you have the matter to hide the truth from me, the matter of work you never have anxiously, among this also published one......” “真的是这样吗？为什么一直没和我说？……我觉得你有事瞒着我,工作的事你从来都没急过,这中间还出版了一本……” „Do not think, I am at heart, where can make you look that anxiously anxiously- does not want to make you be worried.” He Fang hits to block the way, does not want to be puzzled at this matter, the transit puts aside the topic: „Do you live tonight?” “别多想了,我急是急在心里,哪能让你看出来-也是不想让你多担心嘛。”何妨打断道,不想在这事上多纠结,转口移开话题:“你今晚住哪？” „Goes to the hotel to have a look at the vacant room, tomorrow will buy some gifts to visit...... Qin Guanglin to see He Fang to shrink the body again”, remembered has just opened a window, in the car(riage) the temperature compared to the incoming messenger with outside many, hurried to start the vehicle to turn on the air conditioning. “去酒店看看有没有空房吧,明天白天买些礼物再登门……”秦广林看到何妨缩缩身子,才想起刚刚一直开着窗子,车内温度与外面比起来差不了多少,赶紧启动车子打开空调。 „Un...... I will lead you to go to the hospital to inspect tomorrow afternoon.” “嗯……明天下午我带你去医院检查一下。” „Un?” “嗯？” „Otherwise I do not feel relieved...... consider as finished, waits for Luo City to go to the city hospital to have a look again, your He City here hospital I did not feel relieved.” “不然我不放心……算了,等回洛城再去市医院看看,你们河城这边的医院我也不放心。” „Is insufficient, I am really all right......” “不至于,我真没事……” „It is not good, must go.” Qin Guanglin searches the bag of handle back seat to bring, pulls out several board medicines from inside, asked: „Heard that this addictive nature is very big, don't you have the addiction? This medicine, others are several grains of several grains of selling, how do you buy so many?” “不行,必须去。”秦广林探手把后座的袋子拿过来,从里面掏出几板药,问道:“听说这个成瘾性很大,你没瘾吧？还有这个药,别人都是几粒几粒的卖,你怎么买到这么多的？” „It is not wordy, brings, I went to throw it.” “啰不啰嗦,拿过来,我去把它扔了。” He Fang snatches the bag to open the door to get out directly, walks two steps to discard to the trash can by it following the road, then stamps the small broken step to run, spills the collar say/way: „Walks, goes to the hotel to have a look at the room, if no you must continue before my father was strange bedfellows...... came not to greet, you gave me a telephone is also good......” 何妨抢过袋子直接开门下车,顺着路走两步到垃圾桶旁把它丢掉,然后跺着小碎步又跑回来,拉拉脖领道:“走吧,去酒店看看有没有房间,没有的话你就得继续和我爸同床共枕了……来之前也不打声招呼,你给我个电话也好啊……” She was saying was saying suddenly, the doubt is taking a look at Qin Guanglin, „, if I have not seen your car(riage), you are the plan sit one here in the evening?” 她说着说着忽然一顿,狐疑地瞅着秦广林,“要是我没看见你的车,你是不是打算在这儿坐一晚上？” „Without...... how possible, was planning that gives you telephoning to make you get down.” “没有……怎么可能,正打算给你打电话让你下来呢。” Qin Guanglin thought is not quite right, serious was such matter, how talked into the small problem by her in a few words? 秦广林还是觉得不太对,这么严重的事,怎么被她三言两语就说成小毛病了？ „When do you eat that for the last time...... the sleeping pill are?” “你最后一次吃那个……安眠药是什么时候？” „Goes to the ugly mountain to play before probably .” “大概去丑山玩之前。” The ugly mountain...... also had over six months, Qin Guanglin thinks slightly, nods had not said again, started the vehicle to expunge in the direction of hotel slowly. 丑山……算起来也有半年多了,秦广林稍微想了一下,点点头没再多说,发动车子缓缓往酒店的方向开去。