Su Yingxue asked these words, the ambiguous atmosphere when the heart deep place wants to attempt to create two people of the world leans to think of mutually for two people, regarding this she was not skilled, even can say inexperienced, but she is willing to attempt, this was also her transformation. 苏映雪问出这句话,内心深处是想尝试为两人营造些许二人世界时互倾想念的爱昧氛围,对此她并不精通,甚至可以说毫无经验,但是她愿意尝试,这也是她内心的一种转变。 She realized herself , to grasp Li Mu, cannot always be again indecisive to the progress that two people relate like before, Li Mu is also initiative, because of own hesitation, Li Mu now becomes no longer initiative, in this case, oneself, if hesitates, that this relations surely did not have the good possibility. 她意识到自己如果想要抓紧李牧,就不能再像以前那样总是对两人关系的进展而犹豫不决,李牧也曾经主动过,但因为自己的犹豫,以至于李牧现在变得不再主动,在这种情况下,自己如果还犹犹豫豫,那这段关系肯定也就没好的可能了。 The Li Mu's train of thought backed up all of a sudden previous life. 李牧的思绪一下子倒退回了上辈子。 Strives for success in Yanjing, every day drags along an exhausted body to return to rent in the housing, to lie down , on single bed, in his brain always the thinking matter cannot help but, thinks that either some realities, how work on hand following should make, a some function should how to realize, some Boss ug should how to solve ; Again either, thinks the things of some complete wishful thinking. 独自一人在燕京拼搏,每天拖着一副疲惫不堪的身躯回到租住房里、躺在单人床上的时候,他脑子里总是会不由自主的想事情,要么想些现实的,手头的工作后续该怎么做、某一种功能该如何实现、某一个bug该怎么解决;再要么,就是想一些完全痴心妄想的事情。 For example, fantasized oneself have an expensive car, can swim around the China beautiful country ; Fantasized own yearly salary over 1 million, can purchase homes to buy the car(riage) in Yanjing, even receives to enjoy happiness the parents ; Was fantasizing can with Su Yingxue in the same place , oneself not have the night of this sleeping alone difficult dormancy in that case again, each evening, oneself can hug her, incomparably satisfied going off. 比如,幻想自己有辆豪车,可以游遍华夏大好河山;幻想自己年薪过百万,可以在燕京买房买车,甚至把父母接过来享福;幻想着自己可以和苏映雪在一起,那样一来,自己就不会再有这种孤枕难眠的夜晚,每个晚上,自己都可以抱着她,无比满足的睡去。 Investment that especially every so often Li Mu can think, imagines Su Yingxue, to imagine own life, to imagine itself with oneself with her life perfect integration together and she operates together well the life, makes everyone envy, thinks much, even has not fallen asleep to 3-4 : 00 am, is in the condition that half dream partly awakes, all imagination also by own brain about, actually because just this half dream half awakes, but was felt the different kind reality by. 很多时候李牧会想的格外投入,想象苏映雪跟自己在一起、想象自己的生活与她的生活完美融合、想象自己和她一起共同把生活经营得更好、让所有人都羡慕,想得太多,甚至到三四都还没有睡着,就处在那种半梦半醒的状态之中,所有的想象都还被自己的大脑所左右,却正因为这种半梦半醒,而让自己感觉别样的真实。 Such price is the next day must drag the extremely exhausted body and spirit generally dies to shoulder an all day high-intensity work, but Li Mu actually always enjoys, when to that time him, each night half dream partly awoke, is in the arid life the most beckoning small section. 这样的代价一般就是第二天要拖着极其疲惫的身体和精神死扛一整天的高强度工作,但李牧却总是乐此不疲,对那个时候的他来说,每个深夜半梦半醒时,才是枯燥生活中最让人心动的一小段。 Thinks of here, Li Mu explodes not without reason, closes the eye to say in a soft voice: „I think that now peaceful lying down is hugging you on the bed, boiling, is not sleeping.” 想到这里,李牧有感而发,闭上眼睛轻声道:“我现在想安静的躺在床上抱着你,熬着,不睡觉。” The Su Yingxue sound brings several points of shyness: „Why doesn't sleep? What bad idea in the brain has?” 苏映雪声音带着几分羞涩:“为什么不睡觉？脑子里打什么坏主意呢？” Li Mu silly chuckle: „Without having any bad idea, wants to hug you, endures the 3-4 point, endures blurry, endures the most silent place, realizes feelings of dreamland and reality multiple fusion.” 李牧傻呵呵的轻笑一声:“没打什么坏主意,就是想抱着你,熬到三四点,熬到迷迷糊糊、熬到最寂静处,去体会一下梦境与现实多重融合的感觉。” „Dreams and reality multiple fusions? Is what meaning?” Su Yingxue has not understood. “梦和现实多重融合？是什么意思呢？”苏映雪没听懂。 This thinks that Li Mu will say teases the undisguised words, oneself even have the courage to in the telephone cater to him as far as possible, but didn't expect his reply somewhat could not actually be felt the mind by oneself. 本以为李牧会说一些挑逗露骨的话,自己甚至也鼓起勇气要在电话里尽量迎合他,可是没想到他的回答却让自己有些摸不着头脑。 Exceptionally exhausted Li Mu closed the eye, the state of mind on some acceleration dispiriteds, exhausted he lazy swaying back and forth on the bed, the heart deep place actually also held tossed and turned in the past, really also the imaginary condition in the night. 原本就异常疲惫的李牧闭上眼睛,精神状态就有些加速萎靡,身心疲惫的他在床上慵懒的打了个滚,内心深处竟然又抓住了当年在深夜辗转反侧、亦真亦幻的状态。 But at this time, Li Mu's also no longer regards itself at present the so-called billionaire at heart, as if oneself returned to previous life, returned to that half dream half awaking and all situations that whatever imagine. 而此时,李牧的心里也已不再把自己当成眼下所谓的亿万富翁,仿佛自己又回到了上辈子,回到了那个半梦半醒时分、一切任由自己想象的处境。 Remembers Su Yingxue, Li Mu gives birth to several points of moved at heart unexpectedly. 想起苏映雪,李牧心里竟然生出几分伤感。 Had not replied that the Su Yingxue issue, Li Mu somewhat said blurry: „I want to sing to you......” 没回答苏映雪的问题,李牧有些迷迷糊糊的说:“我想给你唱首歌……” Su Yingxue heart one sweet, could not bear said excitedly: „You sang, I am listening!” 苏映雪心头一甜,忍不住兴奋的说:“你唱吧,我听着呢！” Li Mu has nothing preheating, then opens the mouth directly gently hummed Zhang Zhenyue that «What to do» 李牧没任何预热,直接便开口轻轻的哼唱起张震岳的那首《怎么办》 „ You are my only fond dream, “你是我唯一的美梦啊, Also is my only worry, 也是我唯一的烦恼啊, What to do...... 怎么办…… Whenever all over the sky stars nighttime sky, 每当满天繁星的夜空, In the heart always has little void, 心中总有一点点虚空, What to do...... 怎么办…… You always walking past in a hurry, 你总是匆匆的走过, You will not always stop, 你总是不会作停留, But I am waiting, 而我在等待, A your answer. 你的一个答案。 A not being able to say loneliness, 一种说不出来的寂寞, Mood that does not have the dependence, 一个没有依靠的心情, What to do...... 怎么办…… A person at the autumn end night, 一个人在秋末的夜晚, Whether should get out of the way slowly, 是否应该慢慢的走开, What to do I should...... ” 我应该怎么办……” Gentleness that Li Mu sang, because even blurry, half dream partly awoke, some places even did not enunciate clear, but he sang was actually distracted extremely, this song represented the complete sentiment of oneself previous life to Su Yingxue, so many years crazy loves were also besottedly good, is also good and deceive oneself and others are also good and be unwilling also well, all completely in this song. 李牧唱的轻柔,甚至因为迷迷糊糊、半梦半醒,有些地方甚至吐字不清,但他唱的却极为走心,这首歌代表了自己上辈子对苏映雪的全部感情,那么多年的痴恋也好、执迷不悟也好、自欺欺人也好、心有不甘也好,所有的所有全部都在这一首歌里了。 Personally looks like in Li Mu, this song was expressed and deducted simply perfectly, its article that unrequited loved cut into with the first person angle, seemed like vindicating to the girl who oneself unrequited loved, but Li Mu can actually realize that in this song contained was affectionate and helpless, which this vindicated, his mother clearly was one dares to like actually not daring saying that can want actually not to dare to do, the internal monologue that will only indulge in flights of fancy and think aloud instigation that compels in the midnight. 在李牧个人看来,这首歌简直是暗恋的最完美表达与演绎了,它通篇用第一人称的角度切入,看起来是在向自己暗恋的女孩表白,但李牧却很能体会这首歌里所蕴含的那份深情与无奈,这哪是表白,这他妈分明是一个敢爱却不敢说、敢想却不敢做,只会在半夜里胡思乱想、自言自语的怂逼的内心独白罢了。 Isn't his mother the true portrayal of previous life to Su Yingxue? 这他妈不就是自己上辈子对苏映雪的真实写照吗？ previous life, Li Mu not really only waits for Su Yingxue in the pain, he also in unceasingly with other girl contacts, but he is very difficult to give up of heart to Su Yingxue holding to read, makes him very difficult wholeheartedly in other emotions invest. 上辈子,李牧并非真的只在苦等苏映雪,他也在不断和其他的女孩接触,只是他很难放弃心底对苏映雪的那份执念,以至于让他在其他的情感之中都很难全身心投入。 It is not able the investment of wholeheartedly, to be Li Mu to the 33 years old as before single most primary cause, he again unsuccessfully, at least is also a white-collar, is long not badly, is willing to have with the girl who he is in love, is willing to roll the girl of bed sheet also to have with him, because of him is unable the investment of wholeheartedly, to be willing to live with him for a long time, or is willing to marry his girl, Li Mu's past life has not met. 无法全身心的投入,是李牧到三十几岁依旧单身的最主要原因,他再碌碌无为,起码也还算是个白领,长得也不差,愿意和他谈恋爱的女孩有,愿意跟他滚床单的女孩也有,但是正因为他无法全身心的投入,愿意跟他长期生活,或者愿意嫁给他的女孩,李牧上辈子一个也没碰见。 If previous life has the similar girl to be willing with oneself for ever and ever, even if Li Mu also has Su Yingxue at heart, not possible silly crazy spatial and other Su Yingxue to 33 years old, Su Yingxue to him, are this lyrics sings: 如果上辈子有差不多的女孩愿意跟自己天长地久,李牧就算心里还有苏映雪,也不可能傻痴痴的空等苏映雪到三十几岁,苏映雪对他来说,就是这首歌词里唱的: „You are my only fond dream, is my only worry, what to do?” “你是我唯一的美梦啊,也是我唯一的烦恼啊,怎么办？” Everyone has the fond dream, but the fond dream is unable to become true, most people still to be able even the satisfied acceptance reality, but once the fond dream became the worry, what to do that really did not know should. 人人都有美梦,而美梦即便无法成真,大多数人也都可以心安理得的接受现实,可一旦美梦成了烦恼,那就真的不知道该怎么办了。 Li Mu's past life is unable to accept the disparity of fond dream and reality confidently, therefore has gotten sucked but is unable to extricate oneself. 李牧上辈子就是无法坦然接受美梦与现实的差距,所以才会一直深陷其中而无法自拔。 Moreover, the most important thing is, Li Mu is this type quite passive the animal in the sentimental world, he was used to unrequited loving, was used to press the sentiment in the heart, was used to constrain own demand, but Su Yingxue was also a sentimental passive product, two passive people, seemed like two sets of transmission system, had the obvious function conflict, without the actuation of engine, how two sets of transmission system can run by four wheels? 而且,最重要的是,李牧就是这种在感情世界里颇为被动的动物,他习惯了暗恋,习惯了把感情压在心底,更习惯了压抑自己的需求,而苏映雪也是一个感情方面被动的产物,两个被动的人,就好像是两套传动系统,有明显的职能冲突,没有发动机的驱动,两套传动系统又怎么能让四个车轮跑起来？ Also, Zhao Ziqiu appears in the Li Mu's sentiment world will be in harmony for this reason, moreover such allowing nature to take its course, she is warm and initiative, in realizing Li Mu after passive of sentimental, immediately transforms itself an engine that non-stop burning, the power transportation of rushing to Li Mu, once oneself make Li Mu move, the car(riage) can run. 也正是因为这个原因,赵子秋才会在李牧的感情世界里显得那么合拍而且那么的顺其自然,她热情而且主动,在意识到李牧在感情方面的被动之后,立刻把自己转变成了一台不停燃烧的引擎,澎湃的动力输送给李牧,一旦自己让李牧动起来,车就能跑起来。 In the Li Mu's subconscious has felt oneself and between Su Yingxue existing problem, but he does not want to understand where this issue came from. 李牧的潜意识里一直觉得自己和苏映雪之间存在问题,但是他一直没有想明白这种问题到底源自哪里。 He once felt before, Su Yingxue in own side, is the proof of rebirth, oneself as if obtain huge satisfaction, but how he actually neglected to operate two people sentiment. 他以前曾觉得,苏映雪在自己身边,就是自己重生的证明,自己似乎就已经得到了巨大的满足,但他却忽略了如何去经营好两人的感情。 He is holding the previous life deep-rooted brand mark, in mind the Su Yingxue formalization and signifying, but has not gone to remove and then transform real existence this brand mark her from a symbol of symbol diligently, because of this, Su Yingxue had not been entering his life truly, this eventually also causes two people sentiments to become more and more passive. 他抱着上辈子根深蒂固的烙印,在心目中把苏映雪形式化、符号化,而没有努力去把这个烙印去除、然后把她从一个象征的符号转变成一个切实的存在,正因为这样,苏映雪才一直没有真正走进他的生活,这最终也导致两人的感情变得越来越被动。 Li Mu also realized the problem that at this moment finally oneself and between Su Yingxue have, this issue in her, she has not experienced the rebirth after all, she is such a slow hot and passive person, but if the non- acting, two people have bogged down inevitably, but Su Yingxue has accepted itself at present, if oneself are driving, situation perhaps also not like the present passive. 李牧此刻也终于意识到自己与苏映雪之间存在的问题,这问题不在她,毕竟她没有经历过重生,她就是那样一个慢热且被动的人,但如果自己一直不做功,两人就必然停滞不前,但眼下苏映雪早就已经接受了自己,如果自己再主动一些,情况或许也就不会像现在这样被动。 Is so thinking at heart, Li Mu this song also sang the vice- song part, this time Li Mu sang was passionate and touching, sincere: 心里如此想着,李牧这首歌也唱到了副歌部分,这时的李牧唱的更是深情动人、情真意切: „ Stands before that door of your atrium, “站在你心房的那扇门前, I do not know in your heart, 我不知道你的心中, Has me...... 有没有我…… Good wants to suspend the time of the world, 好想暂停全世界的时间, Enable me to be able my heart, 让我可以把我的心, Let you see clearly...... ” 让你看清……” At this time, Su Yingxue calmly listens to Li Mu's to recite in a soft voice, is attracted by the singing sound that Li Mu is full of the true feelings at heart completely, she does not know why Li Mu must sing this song to oneself, because in her opinion, this song as if Li Mu is not in tune to own sentiment, the present condition suspends here, Su Yingxue cannot believe Li Mu so affectionately at heart to oneself. 此时,苏映雪静静听着李牧的轻声吟唱,心里已经完全被李牧饱含真情的歌声所吸引,她不知道李牧为什么要给自己唱这首歌,因为在她看来,这首歌似乎和李牧对自己的感情并不搭调,现实情况摆在这里,苏映雪不敢相信李牧心里会对自己有这般深情。 However, Li Mu's each character as if contains a charm, a charm of long jab innermost feelings, lets Su Yingxue while cannot believe that at heart contradictory thinks that this should be the Li Mu innermost feelings to own emotion. 但是,李牧的每一个字都似乎包含着一种魔力,一种直击内心的魔力,让苏映雪在不敢相信的同时,心里又矛盾的认为这应该就是李牧内心对自己的情感。 Extreme contradiction, makes Su Yingxue feel that intense not sense of reality, like placing oneself dreamland, the genuine and fake minute/share is not clear. 极度的矛盾,也让苏映雪感觉到了强烈的不真实感,如同置身梦境,真真假假分不清楚。 Sang, Li Mu felt like moved things out of the way all of a sudden the giant stone that pressed in the heart, he understands finally, oneself previous life wrong in cannot cut the gordian knot, this whole life wrong in cannot distinguish the clear different reality, unable to get rid of previous life promptly loathsome to the negative impact that oneself brought. 一首歌唱完,李牧感觉好像一下子搬开了压在心头的巨石,他终于明白,自己上辈子错在没能快刀斩乱麻,这辈子错在没能辨清不同的现实、没能及时摆脱上辈子拖泥带水给自己带来的负面影响。 This whole life Su Yingxue is own girlfriend, why can oneself have previous life that also really also imaginary feeling? 这辈子苏映雪已经是自己的女朋友,自己为什么还要有上辈子那种亦真亦幻的感觉？ In this moment, all regretting and regret to be discarded, that brand mark that brings from previous life also by him to start more to see completely fuzzily, the Li Mu heart sets firm resolve, no longer by the previous life shackles and puzzle, changes a new way and a normal and driving way operates itself and Su Yingxue sentiment. 在这一刻,所有的遗憾和后悔全部被他丢弃、那个从上辈子带来的烙印也开始越见模糊,李牧心底下定决心,不再受上辈子的桎梏与困扰,换一个新的方式、一个正常而且主动的方式去经营自己与苏映雪的这份感情。 Thinks of here, the Li Mu opens the mouth sentiment profound meaning said: „I especially think you now, feels like each cell in body to think you......” 想到这里,李牧开口情深意切的说:“我现在特别想你,感觉好像身体里的每一个细胞都在想你……” ...... …… Today's WeChat reply „professional luck” has the benefits, can the rising posture! WeChat: gz Boss uge 今天的微信回复“敬业福”有福利,可以涨姿势！微信号:gzbuge ( To be continued. 17-01-21 (未完待续。、,您的支持,就是我最大的动力。)17-01-21 02:02: 19 02:02:19