PD :: Volume #6

#547: When age

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„Entire family no one is willing to work, anything is I does! Must serve completely you, must prepare food and handle this entire family/home, must look after the flatter mirror, anything is I does, no day of freedom, no day comfortable, gets sick continually does not have the time sickness, anything cannot leave me......” “全家没一个人肯做事的,什么都是我来做！要把你们全部侍候好,又要做饭、打理这整家,又要照顾阿镜,什么都是我来做,没一天自由,没一天自在的,连病也没时间病,什么都离不开我……” Chen Shengdi cried and shouted suddenly hysteric, the words are disorderly, are complaining anything. 陈生娣突然歇斯底里地又哭又喊,话语非常凌乱,控诉着什么。 These words as if were the proverb, spoke thoughtlessly some words that raised to be heavy with forest Qianfei, obviously was Chen Shengdi daily complaint, had said did not know many. 这些话似乎都是老话了,与林倩菲随口提的一些话语就是重的,可见就是陈生娣的日常诉苦,说过不知道多少遍。 Probably this is also this poverty-stricken family's part of real situations, the housework presses completely in Chen Shengdi there, has pressed to step her nerve. 大概这也就是这个穷苦家庭的一部分真实状况,家务事全部压在陈生娣那里,早已压跨了她的神经。 Meanwhile, forest Guowei the complexion is blacker, like in an instant older, sat on the chair dejected, pacing back and forth of ten points confused. 与此同时,林国伟的面色更黑,转眼间像更加苍老了许多,颓然坐在椅子上,十分的彷徨迷茫。 Saw couple around changes, Gu Jun and king Ke, in Cao Yicong and other will of the people know, is they, with forest mirror is missing the direct relation. 看到夫妇两人的前后变化,顾俊和王轲、曹亦聪等人心里都知道,就是他们,与林镜的失踪有直接关系。 The heart of Gu Jun clutches to tighten immediately, not a good estimate was proven for gradually , a tragedy also floats the water surface gradually. He is not even willing to think the truth, some gloomy imagination pictures actually turn in the heart well up, lets he divides not clearly is the imagination or illusion...... 顾俊的心顿时揪紧起来,一个不好的预想渐渐被证为真,一件惨事也就渐渐浮上水面。他甚至不愿意去想真相,一些灰暗的想象画面却在心头翻涌,让他分不清楚是想象的还是幻象…… ...... Pushes down the cliff...... to get buried into the belt/bring to the remote forested mountain abandonment with the earth pit that in the hoe digs out...... 带到深山野林遗弃……推下悬崖……埋进用锄头挖出的土坑里…… He deeply inspires, said: „Auntie Chen, please, the past matter, talk about to us calmly completely clearly.” 他深吸一口气,说道:“陈阿姨,请你冷静点,把当年的事情,全部都给我们讲清楚。” „Talked clearly, we will pour out sentiment processing.” king Kejia a sound, to two people several plus one share pressure, on the country character face face has the long-term interrogation raises on the dignity, „, if not talk clearly, forest Qianfei and hylaeosaurus porch probably need to coordinate our investigations some time, this will definitely affect the studies.” “说清楚了,我们会斟情处理。”王轲加了一把声音,也对两人多加一份压力,国字脸脸庞上有着长期审讯养就的威严,“如果说不清楚,林倩菲和林龙轩可能需要配合我们的调查一段时间,这肯定会影响学业。” „How we really do not know the flatter mirror missing!” forest Guowei urgently said immediately, not only intense fear, and on some anger, „are not related with luxuriant, dragon Xuan, their anything does not know, you must grasp catch us, must shoot dead shoots us!” “我们真不知道阿镜怎么失踪的啊！”林国伟顿时急道,既紧张害怕,又有些怒气上头,“跟菲菲、龙轩没关系,他们什么都不知道,你们要抓就抓我们,要枪毙就枪毙我们！” This middle-aged man shouted very loudly, resented and divulges nowhere pats the tea table, bang the heavy sound, made a sound in the obsolete disorderly living room. 这个中年男人喊得很大声,愤恨、无处宣泄地一拍茶几,嘭啪重响,响在陈旧凌乱的客厅里。 If traded is another countryman, may have a scare by forest country great, but Gu Jun they were gorgeously motionless, has not said anything, but looks. 如果换了是另一个村汉,可能会被林国伟吓一跳,但顾俊他们巍然不动,也没多说什么,只是看着。 Chen Shengdi does not know but actually gradually is calm or low, on the mouth muttered has the word, has not actually sent out any hears the clear speech sound sufficiently, red tears is glittering the complex look, resembled in reading these round of old healthy, studious, and helpful student certificates on opposite wall. 陈生娣倒渐渐地不知是冷静还是低落下来,嘴上喃喃有词,却没有发出任何足以听得清楚的话声,通红的泪目闪烁着复杂的神色,似在看着对面墙上的那些发旧的三好学生奖状。 „Is I......” her language trembles suddenly exudes one, „is my the mouth, blamed me...... I should not him to tell that...... blamed me......” “是我……”她忽然语颤地发出一声,“是我这把嘴,都怪我……我不应该跟他那么说……都怪我……” Gu Jun knits the brows slightly, looked at each other with king Ke, matter as if with the difference that they estimate. 顾俊微微皱眉,与王轲相视了一眼,事情似乎与他们预想的不一样。 Becoming the stiff wood/blockhead did not say a word while forest country great, Chen Shengdi mentioned some past unknown situations. 在林国伟又变得僵硬木头般一言不发的同时,陈生娣讲出了当年一些不为人知的情况。 Forest mirror missing three day ago, Chen Shengdi scolded this son, the cause is forest Jing basketball ringside before the village plays the basketballs of other children with the foot, had the dispute with others, was pushed and shoved one, almost hits, then also came to sue by a guardian. 在林镜失踪的三天前,陈生娣骂了这个儿子一顿,起因是林镜在村前的篮球场边用脚去踢其他小孩的篮球,跟人家起了争执,被人一通推搡,差点打起来,然后还被一个家长上门投诉。 forest Jing said oneself stand there, wants falling the ball help kicks, if he has the hand, he caught to throw with the hand. 林镜说自己只是站在那里,想把落过来的球帮忙踢回去,如果他有手,他就用手接住抛回去了。 But opposite party several children are state decisively he to stir up trouble, his foot is very dirty, he is a monster...... 但对方几个小孩就是咬定他在挑事、他的脚很脏、他是个怪物…… Chen Shengdi has not stood in son's here, works as the surface of that guardian to scold forest mirror one, when that guardian walked, she is angry very much, but also is continue scold forest Jing: „You treat all day in the basketball court look at anything, you could not play, quarrelled with others, stirred up trouble, will annoy troublesome, served you enough bothersomely, but also annoyed troublesome!” 陈生娣没有站在儿子的这边,当着那个家长的面就把林镜一通骂,等那个家长走了,她还是很生气,还在继续数落林镜:“你整天待在篮球场看什么,你又玩不了,跟人家吵,惹事,就会惹麻烦,侍候你就够烦的了,还惹麻烦！” Actually in the past and in usually, Chen Shengdi also often complained scolds the eldest son, she did not understand, she also was very bitter, she thinks that this...... was all right. 其实在以往、在平时,陈生娣也是经常这么抱怨责骂大儿子,她不懂,她心里也很苦,她以为这样……没事。 „The flatter mirror is also my son, is I raises, without the hand is not his mistake, he has is difficult I most to know where I will really complain about him......” “阿镜也是我儿子,也是我养大的,没有手也不是他的错,他有多难我最知道,我哪会真怨他……” At this time, Chen Shengdi of recollection is sobbing the say/way, but on that day, she also scolded several viciously, before had not scolded, at that time after oneself scolded, actually regretted, but obstinate argumentative is not willing to admit mistakes, has ruded awakening by the present. 这时候,回忆的陈生娣哽咽着道,但在那一天,她还骂了几句狠毒的,以前都没那么骂过,当时自己骂了之后其实就后悔,只是嘴硬不愿意认错,到现在早已是后悔莫及。 „I said that...... should at your newly-born that time, listen to discard you who the person urged early, will not implicate itself like the present for a lifetime......” “我说……早应该在你刚出生的那时候,就听人劝的把你扔掉,就不会像现在这样拖累自己一辈子……” Is listening to these, the heart of Gu Jun sinks freely downward, the breath is heavy gradually, as if can feel forest mirror that moment pain. 听着这些,顾俊的心不住地往下沉,呼吸渐重,仿佛能感受到林镜那一刻的痛苦。 But he knows that perhaps oneself forever, does not understand truly that mood, his family of origin is also freely not much. 但他知道自己也许永远,都不会真正明白到那份心情,尽管他的原生家庭也不怎么样。 Chen Shengdi continued, three days later that evening, she is stepping on the tricycle that is carrying two children and several bunches of bananas goes home, the flatter mirror has disappeared. She said that she has not lied on this part, forest Guowei has not lied, that afternoon he indeed outside area, coming back is joins to seek for the flatter mirror. 陈生娣继续在说着,三天后的那天傍晚,她踩着载着两个孩子和几串香蕉的三轮车回到家,阿镜已经不见了。她说自己在这部分上没有撒谎,林国伟也没有撒谎,那天下午他的确是在外地,回来就是加入去寻找阿镜。 Looked for several days, without looking for...... them , there would be no to persist in looking again. 找了几天,没有找着……他们就没有坚持再找下去。 But they are very definite, the flatter mirror is leaves home, in should also live afterward some time. 但他们很确定,阿镜是自己离家出走的,在后来一段时间里应该都还活着。 Possibly in the rumor some neighboring village people's Dongzhou street in that no hand beggar child who sees are he...... 可能传言中邻村有人在东州市区街头看到的那个无手乞丐小孩就是他…… Therefore, the couple once had been to Dongzhou specially, went to the street of that rumor, is looking at the beggars of these streets from afar. 为此,夫妇两人曾经专门到过东州市区,去过那处传言的街头,远远地望着那些街边的乞讨人员。 They have not seen son's form, has not come up to question in detail, perhaps perhaps the son there, is not they have not been bumping. Has gone such a time, they also had nothing to seek for forest Jing the action again, when this son was no longer living, when without this person...... 只是他们没看到儿子的身影,也没有上去细问,也许儿子不在那里,也许是他们没碰着。去过那么一次,他们就再也没有任何寻找林镜的行动了,就当这个儿子不在人世了,当没有这个人…… They obtained an extrication, this family becomes not difficult, the attractive poor|Fei and dragon Xuan's day also feel better. 他们得到了一种解脱,这个家庭也变得没有那么艰难,倩菲和龙轩的日子也好过些。 But for these years, their couple, how could the heart has puts down this missing no hand eldest son truly...... 但这么多年来,他们夫妇两人,心底何曾有真正地放下这个失踪的无手大儿子…… Gu Jun and king Ke and the others listened to this set of excuse, temporarily does not determine, looks that forest Guowei smoked the inexpensive cigarette wooden, looks that Chen Shengdi drew out the body, arrived to link in the master room in living room, Gu Jun and Cao Yicong with looks, saw only Chen Shengdi to take out anything from a old-style marriage leather suitcase in bedside closet. 顾俊、王轲等人听完了这一套说辞,暂时不加判定,看着林国伟木然地抽起了廉价的香烟,看着陈生娣起了身,走到连着客厅的主人房里去,顾俊和曹亦聪跟上去看着,只见陈生娣是从床边衣柜上的一个旧式结婚皮箱里取出了什么来。 „This paper, was...... I who the flatter mirror stayed behind went home on that day, the paper placed on the tea table......” “这张纸,是阿镜留下的……那天我回到家,纸就放在茶几上……” Chen Shengdi is bewildered, what in the hand takes is a small wrinkled white paper. 陈生娣一脸茫然,手中拿着的是一小张皱巴巴的白纸。 Gu Jun received this aging old paper, sees only on the paper to have the character that one line of blue ballpoint pens write, the handwriting writes crookedly, strenuous, but is controlling strongly one by one. 顾俊接过这张陈年旧纸,只见纸上有一行蓝色圆珠笔写的字,字迹写得歪斜、吃力、但竭力控制着一笔一划。 That is the character that the forest mirror writes down, actually does not know how to write down. 那是林镜写下的字,却不知道是怎么写下的。 【I walked, does not need to look for me, when I lived enough, I committed suicide】 【我走了,不用找我,等我活够了,我就自杀】
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