IRAS :: Volume #8

#717: Conscientious piece

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Facing the Zhang Ye answer, only then „Fuck” can voice the feelings of netizens! 面对张烨的答案,只有一声“我草”能表达网友们的心情！ „Is shocked!” “惊呆中！” „Genuine solution opened!” “真解开了！” „You also really have right key!” “你丫还真有正确答案啊！” „fucking awesome! I took!” “牛-逼！我服了！” „Pū, I also took!” “噗,我也服了！” „Has smiled to faint on the keyboard, Teacher Zhang is Teacher Zhang, the way of engaging in scholarship is different from anybody, forever that comedy, the first leg of an eight-legged essay that forever extraordinary, these eight bamboo poles cannot hit I also think that is he conceives a plan to make out of whole cloth temporarily, gathers is really also having the answer!” “已笑晕在键盘上,张老师就是张老师啊,做学问的方式跟任何人都不一样,永远都那么搞笑,永远都那么奇葩,这些个八竿子打不着的破题我还以为是他临时起意瞎编的呢,合着还真有答案！” „Teacher Zhang is bored, can find out the topic of such talking nonsense! Moreover the talking nonsense topic that unexpectedly one's own also your mother leaves one's own untied rationally!” “张老师到底是得有多无聊啊,才能想出这么扯淡的题目！而且居然自己还你妈把自己出的扯淡题给头头是道地解开了！” „Knelt steadily!” “跪稳了！” „Zhang Ye, I also knelt to you!” “张烨,我也给你跪了！” „Teacher Zhang you were too strong! Earth could not block your joking step! Right that the netizens in 679 buildings said that you are bored!” “张老师你太强了！地球已经阻挡不了你逗比的步伐了！679楼的网友说的对,您到底是得有多无聊啊！” The netizens faint! 网友们一片一片地晕倒过去！ Peking University several Teacher were also exploded. 北大的几个老师也被炸出来了。 Mathematics academy of science Pan Dean Weibo: „......” 数学科学院潘院长的微薄:“……” Chinese department Su Na Weibo: „......” 中文系苏娜的微薄:“……” The Chinese department is Director Chang Kaige Weibo: „......” 中文系系主任常凯歌的微薄:“……” These topics, Zhang Ye is the seat of honor writes, has not recalled through Memory Search Capsule, is not his memory is good, directly the topic of his world writing down, but when initially made «Zhang Ye's Talkshow» with the WebTV stage, after Zhang Ye once «Mr. Zhou Live Show» as well as «Violent « Tonight 80, Talkshow» and Walked Big Event » and other Talkshow or kind of Talkshow program takes Memory Search Capsule to eat completely one side, recalled, has remembered that the copy has gotten down, the nature, he can take to come out on to be able without hesitation to use, but today throws to come out. Several topics, are his Earth «Violent Walk the topic in Big Event». 这些题目,张烨是上手就写的,根本就没有通过记忆搜索胶囊去回忆,不是他记忆力好,直接把他那个世界的题目给记下来了,而是在当初跟网络电视台做《张烨脱口秀》的时候,张烨曾经将《今晚80后脱口秀》和《壹周立波秀》以及《暴走大事件》等脱口秀或类脱口秀节目全部拿记忆搜索胶囊吃了一边,已经回忆过了,已经将记忆拷贝下来了,自然,他可以不假思索拿出来就能用了,而今天扔出来。的几道题目,都是他那个地球《暴走大事件》里的题。 If takes them as several high examination questions, inside definitely has not the rigorous place, but at least can abundant everybody smile, this has sufficed, the Zhang Ye goal was also achieved. His rigorousness uses, in the college entrance examination set the topic on has sufficed, now the college entrance examination just ended, so was again rigorous had a joke backfire, inserted funny dialog several, teased several coughs, instead helped improving his image, changed the image. 如果把它们作为几道高考题,里面肯定有不严谨的地方,但至少能博大家一笑,这就够了,张烨的目的也就达到了。他的严谨用在高考出题上就够了,现在高考刚结束,再那么严谨就太自讨没趣了,插科打诨几句,逗几句咳嗽,反而有利于改善他的形象,把形象扭转回来。 Now looks like, the effect is good. 现在看来,效果不错。 „Teacher Zhang is that joking!” “张老师还是那么逗比！” „Yes, sets the geography topic physics topic, with saying Crosstalk!” “是啊,出个地理题物理题,都跟说相声似的！” „I was this year by Zhang Ye oppressive miserable the Beijing examinee, how I most hated this goods a point to hate me unable to hate, Zhang Ye old can using an alternative the person amusing, wants to scold him two both with a smile to scold, oh, this possibly was the Zhang Ye individual style conscientious piece! In the words has the piece, in program has the piece, in the poem has the piece, sets the topic continually is the pieces!” “我就是今年被张烨虐惨了的京城考生啊,我最恨这货的一点就是怎么恨我都恨不起来啊,张烨老能变着法地把人给逗乐了,想骂他两句都是笑着骂的,唉,这可能就是张烨的个人风格吧一个兢兢业业的段子手！话里有段子,节目里有段子,诗里有段子,连出题都是段子！” „Likes Zhang Ye more and more!” “越来越喜欢张烨啦！” „joking Associate Professor!” “一个逗比的副教授！” „Has the Zhang Ye place, must have the question, must have scolds the sound, but must have similarly happily, I am in my heart the entertainment Celebrity appearance!” “有张烨的地方,少不了质疑,少不了骂声,但同样也少不了欢乐,我才是我心中娱乐明星的模样！” At this time, had the netizen to create a disturbance. 这时,有网友起哄。 „Other topic?” “别的题呢？” „Other topic anything answers!” “其他题什么答案啊！” „That sprinkles the excrement the topic, how do you solve?” “那泼粪的题,你怎么解？” However, while Zhang Ye must announce under when together topic answer, in the commentary of weibo suddenly had a person to write the one's own answer, that answer shook at that time all people, was not because the answer wrote specially splendidly, but answer most people who because that person of giving could not understand, x axes, the y axis, the differential, the function, a series of densely packed formulas piled there, the unclear sleep was severe, looked is the fucking awesome appearance! 然而,正当张烨要公布下一道题目答案时,微博的评论里突然有个人写出了自己的答案,那份答案当时就把所有人都震住了,不是因为答案写得特别出色,而是因为那人给出的答案大部分人都看不懂,x轴,y轴,微分,函数,一系列密密麻麻的公式堆在那里,让人不明觉厉,一看就是很牛-逼的样子！ „Shit, this person who?” “我靠,这人谁啊？” „Did some capable people calculate really?” “真有能人算出来了啊？” „God!” “神了！” „Hahaha, was good!” “哈哈哈,太牛了啊！” „Untied? Was the answer right?” “解开了吗？答案对了吗？” Zhang Ye looked, also stares, immediately after giving that answer , the flour dim sum a to praise, looked at the name of that weibo user again, after he is startled again, then as if suddenly enlightened smiled. That person is called Lingling po. Relying on the intuition, Zhang Ye had guessed correctly this person 80% are Huang Lingling, that he in the young miss who on Summer Palace country International Youth's Mathematical Competition runs into. 张烨看后也是一愣,立即给那个答案后面点了一个赞,再一看那微博用户的名字,他再怔之后便恍然大悟地笑了。那人名字叫玲玲po。凭着直觉,张烨猜到了这人八成就是黄玲玲,那个他在颐和园国际青少年数学大赛上遇到的小姑娘。 Then, Lingling po then private chatted Zhang Ye, „Teacher, is my answer correct?” 接着,玲玲po便私聊了张烨,“老师,我答案正确吗？” Zhang Ye replies immediately, „Schoolmate Huang writes is very good.” 张烨立即回复,“黄同学写的很好。” Schoolmate Huang? Lingling po has sent an astonished expression immediately, „you, you know that is I? Teacher you...... Still remembers me?” 黄同学？玲玲po登时发了一个惊愕的表情,“您,您怎么知道是我？老师您……还记得我？” Zhang Ye has sent the smiling face in the past, „is I guesses that as for remembering you...... I do not have a bad memory, your younger brother college entrance examination?” 张烨发了笑脸过去,“是我猜的,至于记不记得你……我还没那么健忘啊,你弟弟高考了吗？” Huang Lingling: „His next year college entrance examination, I am earlier than for one year him.” 黄玲玲:“他明年高考,我比他早一年。” Zhang Ye: „Your Mathematics examination paper I looked, the perfect score, is very good, you are also in this year's Beijing examinee only Mathematics perfect score, does not have the second perfect score.” 张烨:“你的数学卷子我看了,满分,很棒,你也是今年京城考生里唯一一个数学满分的,没有第二个满分。” Huang Lingling: „Hey, thanks Teacher, I will make persistent efforts.” 黄玲玲:“嘿嘿,谢谢老师,我会再接再厉的。” Zhang Ye asked: „First volunteers the report?” 张烨问:“第一志愿报的哪儿？” Huang Lingling wants not to think: „Naturally is Peking University! I biggest goal is when your student, but does not know that tests cannot be accepted, because my other subjects do not have the Mathematics result to be so good.” 黄玲玲想也不想:“当然是北大！我最大的目标就是当您的学生,不过不知道考不考得上,因为我其他科目没有数学成绩那么好。” Zhang Ye said: „All right, if the proportion, you have looked for me, I help you arrange.” 张烨道:“没事,如果过不了分数线,你来找我,我帮你安排。” Huang Lingling said pleasantly surprised: „, Real? Thanks, thanks Teacher!” 黄玲玲惊喜道:“啊,真的吗？谢谢,谢谢老师！” A proportion left, but the Peking University Tsinghua proportion now is quite fuzzy, without a too explicit boundary, sometimes the score seems very high, not necessarily really can on Peking University Tsinghua, but in other words, the score is not sometimes high, not necessarily cannot get up Peking University Tsinghua. 一本的分数线出了,但北大清华的分数线现在还比较模糊,没有一个太明确的界限呢,有时候分数看上去很高,也不一定就真能上北大清华,但换句话说,有时候分数不高,也不一定就上不了北大清华。 Other college score boundary is possibly very clear, for example this score can on Beijing Normal University, for example this score to the next scores be able on people, moreover inside first will volunteer with quite to be also important, after the synthesis that second will volunteer and so on will have an automatic rank, but Peking University Tsinghua this school degree of freedom was quite high, will not have that many limits, the authority will also be very big, they will have the independent recruitment of students, the leeway comparison that a move of quota, in the hand will fluctuate especially will be many, sometimes even the examinee for example first will volunteer the report was north Jiaotong University, the score has also sufficed, properly speaking. Definitely is 100% is enrolled by northern Jiaotong University, second not possibly volunteers the colleges to snatch, does not have the opportunity to snatch, but Tsinghua Peking University has the right even if, in the examinee volunteers in the column not to fill under situation of their colleges, can after soliciting the agreement of examinee is direct „wanting” to come the person, this is Domestic ranks first and privilege of second world well-known colleges and universities is so is unreasonable. 别的普通高校分数界限可能很明确,比如这个分数就能上北师大,比如过了这个分数到下一个分数之间就能上人大,而且里面第一志愿和第二志愿之类的也会比较重要,综合后会有一个自动排位,但北大清华这种学府自由度就比较高了,没那么多限制,权力也很大,他们有自主招生,还有特招名额,手里浮动的余地比较多,甚至有时候考生比如第一志愿报的是北交大,分数也够了,按理说。肯定是100被北交大录取的,第二志愿院校不可能去抢,也没机会去抢,但清华北大却有权利在即使考生志愿栏里没有填写他们院校的情况下,也能在征求考生的同意后把人直接“要”过来,这就是国内排名第一和第二的世界名校的特权就是这么不讲道理。 Chatted several with Huang Lingling, pulled several idle with the netizens, Zhang Ye „pit father sound” has retired after meritorious service in one piece of netizens, has gotten down the line. 跟黄玲玲聊了几句,跟网友们扯了几声闲篇儿,张烨才在网友们的一片“坑爹声”中功成身退,下了线。
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