The bright moonlight penetrates the window, climbs the Gryffindor Tower common room. 皎洁的月光透过窗户,爬进格兰芬多塔楼公共休息室。 In place that the moonlight cannot illuminate, a diminutive form is hiding under the chair trembles. 在月光照不到的地方,一个矮小的身影正躲在椅子下面瑟瑟发抖。 Peter Pettigrew shrinks is twisting both hands, the breath is almost out of breath. 小矮星彼得畏缩地绞着双手,呼吸几乎是上气不接下气。 The matter that for 12 years, he has been afraid occurred finally. His once good friend, Sirius Black ran away from Azkaban, he rushed in Hogwarts, in just, them among even only had the separation of one wall. 12年来,他一直害怕的事情终于发生了。他曾经的挚友,小天狼星布莱克从阿兹卡班逃了出来,他闯进了霍格沃茨,就在刚刚,他们之间甚至只有一墙之隔。 Peter understands that the past years was he betrayed Mr. and Mrs. Potter to Voldemort, Black was looks for itself to take revenge, he wanted to kill itself. 彼得明白,当年是他向伏地魔出卖了波特夫妇,布莱克是来找自己复仇的,他想要杀死自己。 Wish of his instinct escapes, but does not know where should hide, he too understood Black, since the opposite party knows oneself were also living, then absolutely will not give up. 他本能的想要逃跑,但是不知道该躲到哪里,他太了解布莱克了,对方既然知道自己还活着,那么就绝对不会善罢甘休。 Even if here has several hundred dementor(s), even if makes earth-shakingly entire Hogwarts, Black will not flinch, before catching itself again, he will not give up. This is Sirius Black, true Gryffindor, never knows that the fear and spiritless is anything's monster. 即便这里有几百个摄魂怪,即便将整个霍格沃茨闹得天翻地覆,布莱克也不会退缩,再抓到自己之前,他是不会罢手的。这就是小天狼星布莱克,一个真正的格兰芬多,一个从来不知道害怕和懦弱是什么的怪物。 Could 12 years ago is the same, comes one to play dead again. 也许可以和12年前一样,再来一场假死。 This thought just reappeared in the Peter mind, was overruled by him. 这个念头刚在彼得脑海中浮现,便被他否决。 Here is not 12 years ago that muggle(s) street, this facing also not only only has a Black person. 这里不是12年前那条麻瓜街道,他这次面对的也不仅仅只有布莱克一个人。 Here is Hogwarts, in the castle also has Dumbledore, Snape, Lupin and Professor McGonagall, James and Lily son Harry, as well as that is called the Ivan Mason's youth, their intelligently and formidable and has the courage. 这里是霍格沃茨,城堡内还有邓布利多、斯内普、卢平、麦格教授,詹姆和莉莉的儿子哈利,以及那个叫做艾文梅森的少年,他们每个人都比自己聪明、都比自己强大、都比自己有勇气。 Wants like deceiving Sirius Black, has deceived these people, was too difficult and be too difficult! 想要像骗过小天狼星布莱克一样,骗过这些人,实在太难、太难了！ Also after ran away, where can oneself go to? 再说逃出去后,自己又能去哪里呢？ These also living after Death Eater(s) obtains the rumor, will not let off his, after Dark Lord listened to his informing in the past, is defeated. 那些还活着的食死徒得到风声后,是不会放过他的,黑魔王当年是听了他的告密之后,才失败的。 To the present, Peter was not clear, that formidable to the person who the name cannot raise, why will be defeated by a baby? He is not clear, oneself obviously had initially chosen a powerhouse side, why until now this situation? 一直到现在,彼得也不明白,那个强大到连名字都不能提的人,为什么会被一个婴儿击败呢？他不明白,自己当初明明选择了强者一方,为什么会到如今这种地步呢？ All as if returned to the dot, returns for 20 years ago just admittance at that time. 一切仿佛回到了圆点,回到20年前自己刚入学那个时候。 Peter Pettigrew still remembers oneself enter a school that branch ceremony, thin and weak diminutive he shiver moves toward Sorting Hat, he has put on that hat, that top big to blocking from Sorting Hat of his eye, he cannot see under the stage completely. 小矮星彼得还记得自己入学那一届分院仪式,瘦弱矮小的他颤抖的走向分院帽,他戴上了那顶帽子,那顶大到遮住他眼睛的分院帽,他完全看不到台下。 He too has been afraid, from childhood was this, he made anything not to be good, he was spiritless, is not very intelligent and also does not have the excellent magic talent, he is afraid itself to be hurried back by the hat, he was afraid sees mother disappointed look again. 他太害怕了,从小时候便是这样,他做什么什么都不行,他性格懦弱、不够聪明、又没有过人的魔法天赋,他害怕自己会被帽子赶回去,他害怕再一次看到母亲失望的眼神。 „Difficult, very difficult!” Sorting Hat starts to speak in his ear, „you are not a brave child, not having enough wisdom and will not firm, not to be willing well the steadfast effort, although the pure blood is very difficult to live in Slytherin, does not have the quality that Ravenclaw and Gryffindor request, even if mediocre, but the innermost feelings also unwillingly keep steadfast ordinary Hufflepuff, making me think well where you should go to?” “难,非常的难！”分院帽开始在他的耳边说起话来,“你不是一个勇敢的孩子,没有足够的智慧、心志不坚定、不肯好好踏实的努力,虽然纯血可是很难在斯莱特林生活下去,又没有拉文克劳和格兰芬多所要求的品质,即使平庸但内心又不甘留在踏实平凡的赫奇帕奇,让我好好想一想,你该去哪里呢？” Yes, where should oneself go to? 是啊,自己该去哪里呢？ Who since childhood loses the father and mother are bound by a common destiny, although is poor, but mother exhausts ability to oneself purchases all magic apparatus, she has the great expectations to oneself, every night before sleeping, she will tell father's story to oneself. 从小失去父亲的自己和母亲相依为命,虽然家境贫寒,但是母亲还是竭尽所能给自己购买所有魔法用具,她对自己抱有厚望,每天晚上睡觉前,她都会给自己讲述父亲的故事。 Peter still remembers that mother's story, in her story, the father is heroic Gryffindor, even if he is not strongest, but is fearless, person who even if not raise the name facing that he has not been afraid. 彼得还记得母亲的故事,在她的故事里面,父亲是一个英勇的格兰芬多,即便他不是最强的,但是无所畏惧,即便是面对那个连名字都不提的人,他也不曾害怕过。 Peter can hear from own mother's expression, she is proud and delighted for the father. 彼得从自己母亲的语气中听得出来,她为父亲感到自豪和骄傲。 „Gryffindor, Gryffindor and Gryffindor, I want to go to Gryffindor, I want the courage, I am a brave person!” Peter is shouting to Sorting Hat in the innermost feelings loudly crazily, „I must change timid spiritless, I must become with father same champion(s), I must be respected, I cannot disappoint mother!” “格兰芬多、格兰芬多、格兰芬多,我想去格兰芬多,我想拥有勇气,我是一个勇敢的人！”彼得在内心对着分院帽大声狂喊道,“我要改变胆小懦弱的自己,我要成为和父亲一样的勇士,我要受人敬仰,我不能让母亲失望！” „Gryffindor?!” Sorting Hat some sound surprise, „you said slightly you must go to Gryffindor, good, this perhaps is not a best choice, but I hope that you can in the later long path, found that to bury the In the depths of his heart courage.” “格兰芬多？！”分院帽的声音略微有些诧异,“你说你要去格兰芬多,那好吧,这也许并不是一个最好的选择,但我希望你能在以后漫长的道路中,找到那份埋藏在内心深处的勇气。” „Gryffindor!” “格兰芬多！” Chair following Peter Pettigrew has smiled happily, that is in his life the most magnificent time, he as if once again hears Sorting Hat to shout to all people with the resounding sound that flash that choose, he puts Buddha to see mother to look once again to the satisfactory look. 椅子下面的小矮星彼得开心的笑了,那是他人生中最辉煌的时刻,他似乎又一次听到分院帽用响亮的声音向所有人喊出自己选择的那一刹那,他放佛又一次看到母亲看向自己满意的眼神。 However his smiling face coagulates quickly, Sorting Hat said right, his not suitable Gryffindor, he to obtain in this institute, only then ridiculed. 但是他的笑容很快凝固下来,分院帽说的没错,他并不适合格兰芬多,他在这个学院中得到的只有嘲笑。 Everybody ridiculed that he is not very brave, the Hogwarts studies make him feel the pressure, he discovered the curriculum that any have not excelled , the professors looked does not have other sentiment to own look besides the disappointment, he leaves mother to be getting more and more far to his request. 大家嘲笑他不够勇敢,霍格沃茨学业让他感觉到压力,他发现没有任何一门自己擅长的课程,教授们看向自己的眼神中除了失望之外没有别的感情,他离母亲对自己的要求越来越远。 He had not found the courage in this institute, he discovered that oneself was getting more and more ordinary and feels inferior. 他没有在这个学院中找到勇气,他发现自己越来越平凡和自卑了。 Cannot such get down again, he needs some people to help itself. 不能再这么下去,他需要有人来帮助自己。 Peter has discovered quickly then the target, James Potter, Sirius Black and Remus Lupin is in this the most outstanding three people, their three people compose the clique always light shining in all directions, perhaps they need a personal servant. 彼得很快便发现了目标,詹姆波特、小天狼星布莱克、莱姆斯卢平是他这一届中最优秀的三个人,他们三个人组成小团体总是光芒四射,也许他们需要一个跟班。 Right, oneself can play this role perfectly. 没错,自己可以完美的充当这个角色。 Fortunately they admitted themselves, Peter Pettigrew once for this reason felt that the anticipation and joy, he thinks oneself can like them outstanding, no, at least can become has to have the feeling, becomes can make mother proud?! 幸运的是他们接纳了自己,小矮星彼得曾经为此感觉到期待和快乐,他以为自己可以像他们一样优秀,不,至少可以变得有存在感、变得可以让母亲骄傲了吧？！ For this has the feeling and pride, Peter is resigned to endure all. 为了这份存在感和骄傲,彼得甘心忍受一切。 In bystander opinion, he is one in this clique, he is James, Sirius and Lupin friend. 在外人看来,他是这个小团体中的一员,他是詹姆、小天狼星和卢平的朋友。 But only Peter Pettigrew know that he is a personal servant, that is all. 但是只有小矮星彼得自己知道,他不过是一个跟班,仅此而已。 James regards him for the object who can show off oneself Quiddich talent at any time, his existence also for better serves as contrast the Sirius' courage and dauntlessness, even that werewolf Lupin, he also looks down upon himself continually. 詹姆视他为一个可以随时炫耀自己魁地奇天赋的对象,他的存在也只是为了更好的衬托小天狼星的勇气和无畏,甚至连那个狼人卢平,他也看不起自己。 Right, their three have not been regarded as the friends, at best is the companion, but more often, he is the personal servant who can direct at will. 没错,他们三个从来没有将自己看作是朋友,充其量不过是同伴罢了,但更多的时候,他还是一个可以随意使唤的跟班。 Arrives spiritlessly base and low, to can neglect base and low, perhaps this is also the ideas of all people. 懦弱到卑微,卑微到可以忽略,恐怕这也是所有人的想法。 But Peter once for this reason felt to satisfy, his asking does not stand in the midpoint of stage, focused attention on by all people. 但彼得却一度为此感到满足,他不求站在舞台的正中央,受所有人瞩目。 So long as in the corner a common position, enough he satisfies. 只要角落里一个不起眼的位置,就足够他满足。 Perhaps he had not found the courage that oneself have looked forward to this ancient institute, but he actually depends upon the strength and honor that other ways harvest themselves to need, although are not many, but will most at least not make mother feel for oneself again disappointed. 他或许没有在这个古老的学院内找到自己一直憧憬的勇气,但是他却依靠其他途径收获自己需要的力量和荣誉,虽然不多,但最起码不会让母亲再为自己感到失望。 We hope that has the courage and chase strength, does not have the repel. 希望拥有勇气和追逐力量,并不存在排斥。 Seven years of Hogwarts professions, make Peter understand finally, oneself need is not the heroic fearless courage, but is the formidable incomparable strength. 七年的霍格沃茨生涯,终于让彼得明白,自己需要的不是什么英勇无畏的勇气,而是强大无比的力量。 If his father once had that strength, he will die, oneself and life of mother will not be dehumanizing. 如果他的父亲曾经有那种力量,他就会那么死去,自己和母亲的生活也不会那么凄苦。 The formidable strength, this is the thing that he has tracked down. 强大的力量,这才是他一直追寻的东西。 After the graduation, his three companions want to join the Order of the Phoenix to resist Voldemort, Peter want to reject, because his very clear both sides power balance. However he does not dare, he has been accustomed to obeying the clique another three people's the orders. 在毕业之后,他的三个同伴想要加入凤凰社对抗伏地魔,彼得本来想拒绝,因为他很清楚双方力量对比。但是他不敢,他已经习惯于服从小团体中另外三个人的命令。 He does not dare not to say to his companions, this needs the formidable courage similarly, since he had not had this type of thing. Also, he was also afraid disappoints mother, he knows that mother hopes oneself joined the Order of the Phoenix. 他不敢对自己的同伴们说不,这同样需要强大的勇气,他一直以来都不曾拥有过这种东西。再说,他也害怕让母亲失望,他知道母亲是希望自己加入凤凰社的。 The mother has made Peter feel the pressure to oneself expectation, but until that moment, he discovered that this pressure turned into a serious burden, presses him not to gasp for breath. 母亲对自己的期望一直让彼得感觉到压力,但是直到那一刻,他才发现这份压力已经变成了一个沉重的包袱,压得他喘不过气来。 Peter Pettigrew still remembers that days, whenever James, Sirius and Lupin defeat the Voldemort's plot to feel for their four once again happy time, he feels many one point of fears for this reason. 小矮星彼得还记得那段日子,每当詹姆、小天狼星和卢平为他们四个又一次挫败伏地魔的阴谋而感到高兴的时候,他都为此感觉到多一分的恐惧。 He can feel that the Dark Lord anger, he can feel that person's who hatred the name does not raise to oneself four people, this will look like one forever the nightmare without limits. 他能感觉到黑魔王的愤怒,他能感觉到那个连名字都不提的人对自己四个人的痛恨,这就像是一场永无止境的噩梦。 Cannot such get down again, Peter Pettigrew could not look that continues to resist Voldemort to have any advantage, even if he risks neck to do these matters, but obtains the honor forever only has James, Sirius and Lupin three people. 不能再这么下去了,小矮星彼得看不出来继续对抗伏地魔自己会有什么好处,即便他冒着生命危险去做这些事,但得到荣誉的永远只有詹姆、小天狼星和卢平三个人。 Let alone Dumbledore is more senile gradually, his strength is declining \; But Voldemort actually at the height of power, his strength and influence day by day formidable. 更何况邓布利多正在逐渐衰老,他的力量正在衰退\;而伏地魔却如日中天,他的力量和势力正一日比一日强大。 Is camp that the time chooses itself to give loyalty, regarding a weak one, most needs is not achieves any earthshaking great accomplishment, but makes a wise choice. 是时候选择自己效忠的阵营了,对于一个弱者来说,最需要不是去做什么惊天动地的大事,而是做一个明智的选择。 He cannot to his father such, what is stupid was Dumbledore devotes life, obscure dying, this stupid courage besides left behind heavy burden and sorrowful fondly remembering to own wife and child, without any significance. 他不能向自己的父亲那样,愚蠢的为邓布利多效命、默默无闻的死去,这份愚蠢的勇气除了给自己的妻子和孩子留下一个沉重的包袱和悲痛的怀念之外,没有任何意义。 He must choose his destiny, he must obtain the formidable strength. 他要选择自己的命运,他要获得强大的力量。 Dark Lord has promised him, so long as unifies magic circle, before he will obtain, strength, power and influence and status that is hard to imagine. 黑魔王已经许诺过他,只要统一魔法界,他就会获得之前难以想象的力量、权势和地位。 Although the method is different, so long as there are these, mother will again certainly feel for oneself proud. 虽然方法不同,但是只要有这些,母亲一定会重新为自己感到骄傲的。 As for betraying own companion guilty and rebukes oneself, Peter never this feeling. 至于背叛自己的同伴的愧疚和自责,彼得从来没有过这种感觉。 Instead in their eyes, oneself is also only a personal servant, is always. 反正在他们眼中,自己也只是一个跟班罢了,向来都是。