„Dennis! Dennis!” “丹尼斯！丹尼斯！” The familiar shout reverberates in the ear, Dennis can feel that some people are promoting oneself body, but he does not want to respond, only pretends anything unable to feel same, is shutting tightly the eyes, rolls up in the trench. 熟悉的呼喊声在耳边回荡,丹尼斯能感到有人正推动自己的身体,可他不想回应,只装作什么都感受不到一样,紧闭着双眼,蜷缩在堑壕里。 The explosive sound of thundering resounds in the side, the sand dust whips repeatedly unceasingly on own body, he can feel that has the warm liquid to wind through on the skin, can feel, in the deep place of trench gloomy pollution, somewhat plump mouse group is climbing over fast. 轰鸣的爆炸声在身旁响起,沙尘反复不断地拍打在自己的身上,他能感到有温热的液体在皮肤上流过,更能感受到,在堑壕阴暗浑浊的深处,有些肥硕的鼠群正快速爬过。 „Dennis!” “丹尼斯！” The shout resounds again, opposite party's each summon, the heavy hammer, raps probably in Dennis's heart, his will, heart and dignity, covering entirely crevice of rap. 呼喊声再一次响起,对方的每一次呼唤,都像是重锤般,敲击在丹尼斯的心头上,将他的意志、心脏、尊严,敲击的布满裂隙。 „Shut up!” Dennis shuts tightly to focus, the innermost feelings are roaring unceasingly, „shuts up! Beirrogo!” “闭嘴啊！”丹尼斯紧闭着眼,内心不断地怒吼着,“闭嘴啊！伯洛戈！” „Dennis?” “丹尼斯？” The shout turned suddenly gently, Dennis narrowed the eyes to focus, in the line of sight of mold lake, he can notice that a thin form is standing before his body, his clothes were tattered, stained the bloodstain, the helmet of top of the head covered entirely the scratch and hollow, in the hand grabs the rifle of fixing bayonet, the blood has dripped slowly the knife point. 呼喊声忽然变成轻柔了起来,丹尼斯眯着眼,模湖的视线里,他能看到一个消瘦的身影正站在他的身前,他身上的衣服破破烂烂的,沾满血迹,头顶的钢盔布满划痕与凹陷,手中抓着一把上了刺刀的步枪,鲜血缓缓地淌过刀尖。 Dennis cannot see clearly his face, but he knows, the opposite party at this moment is that certain the look the correct use is full to detest and spurn to look at itself. 丹尼斯看不清他的脸,但他知道,对方此刻一定正用充满嫌恶与唾弃的眼神看着自己。 Yes, own camouflage was really laughable, pretended the stupor obviously the appearance, the body actually shivers uncontrolled, thinks own this self-deceiving appearance, Dennis then felt that the deep shame and shame, may make him stand, he also did not have such courage. 是啊,自己的伪装实在是太可笑了,明明装作昏迷的样子,身子却不受控制地颤抖,一想到自己这副自欺欺人的模样,丹尼斯便感到深深的耻辱与羞愧,可让他站起来,他又没有那样的勇气。 „Don't let me down, Dennis.” That person continues to say. “别让我失望,丹尼斯。”那人继续说道。 Dennis responded, was still unceasing shivering and silence, that person thorough was disappointed. 丹尼斯所回应的,仍是不断的颤抖与沉默,那人彻底失望了。 „Beirrogo! Dennis!” Another sound is bellowing. “伯洛戈！丹尼斯呢！”另一个声音大吼着。 „He was exploded by the bomb faints,” Beirrogo lies to say for Dennis, „seemingly fainted...... I to replace his work.” “他被炸弹炸昏了过去,”伯洛戈替丹尼斯说谎道,“看起来昏死了过去……我可以接替他的工作。” „Do you determine?” “你确定吗？” „I determined.” “我确定。” „Good.” “好。” Under the command of commander, the soldiers start to assemble, they will start a charge, bores a hole through the defense line of enemy, this is the offensive that goes to one time, many people will fall on the road of charge. 在指挥官的号令下,士兵们开始集结,他们将发动一次冲锋,凿穿敌人的防线,这是一次赴死的攻势,许多人都会倒在冲锋的路上。 After the resonant bugle horn sound resounds through, Dennis hears the angry roaring sound that overlapped, overlaps the unceasing sound of footsteps to leave him to go far away, he opens eyes, only saw that say/way familiar form, is going far away fast, until vanishing in thick smoke that in the shell raised. 当嘹亮的号角声响彻后,丹尼斯听到了交叠起来的怒吼声,重叠不断的脚步声正离他远去,他睁开眼,只看到了那道熟悉的身影,正快速远去,直到消失在了炮弹掀起的浓烟里。 This was Dennis sees Beirrogo for the last time, afterward heard their charge successes, not only killed to put on the defense line of enemy, but also advanced, penetrated under the tall wall of sacred city...... 这是丹尼斯最后一次见到伯洛戈了,后来听说他们的冲锋成功了,不仅杀穿了敌人的防线,还一路推进,深入到了神圣之城的高墙下…… „Dennis.” “丹尼斯。” The shouts resound again, it in the sound with memory overlapped in one, after was absent-minded, the scalding hot air dissipation, the demented scorched earth was also nothing left, the automobile of some steady advance, as well as sat in Dennis opposite Yin Fan. 呼唤声再次响起,它与记忆里的声音重叠在了一起,一阵恍忽后,灼热的空气消散,癫狂的焦土也荡然无存,有的只是平稳前进的汽车,以及坐在丹尼斯对面的尹凡。 „Beirrogo Lazarus,” Dennis muttered, „I think I will not hear this name again.” “伯洛戈·拉撒路,”丹尼斯喃喃道,“我以为我不会再听到这个名字了。” Yin Fan asked, „can speak between you and him the story?” 尹凡问,“可以讲讲你与他之间的故事吗？” „This is more than 60 years ago matters, moreover he had died,” Dennis is not clear, „we are only the unimportant people, forgot by the history......” “这已经是六十多年前的事了,而且他已经死了,”丹尼斯不明白,“我们都只是小人物而已,被历史遗忘的……” „No one forgets you,” Yin Fan said seriously, „I am unable to disclose the reason to you, but we want to know that you and his story, this is important.” “没人遗忘你们,”尹凡郑重地说道,“我无法向你透露原因,但我们希望知道你和他的故事,这非常重要。” Yin Fan bit heavily the pronunciation, the Dennis expression was startled, in his eyes, Yin Fan eyes became incomparably radiant, just like the clear gem. 尹凡咬重了字音,丹尼斯表情怔住了,在他的眼中,尹凡的眼睛变得无比璀璨,犹如晶莹的宝石般。 Suddenly filled up the innermost feelings the pressure on vanish, Dennis felt the inexplicable security sense from Yin Fan's body, as if all secrets can disclose to him. 一时间填满内心的压力消失了般,丹尼斯从尹凡的身上感受到了莫名的安全感,仿佛所有的秘密都可以向他透露。 Yin Fan asked, „existence of Beirrogo, as if made you very suffer, why was this?” 尹凡问,“伯洛戈的存在,似乎令你很痛苦,这是为什么？” The Dennis nearly sleep talking said, „...... is the self- anticipation and true presents the difference probably probably, the separate feeling of brings.” 丹尼斯近乎梦呓般地说道,“大概……大概是自我的期待和真正的自己出现差别,所带来的割裂感吧。” Yin Fan nods saying that „self-disunion.” 尹凡自顾自地点头道,“自我分裂。” As the interrogation expert, Yin Fan is very clear this psychological trouble with eating, the emotion of individual and to own attitude is in conflict with own behavior and performance. 作为审讯专家,尹凡很清楚这种心理结症,个体对自己的态度和情感与自己的行为和表现之间存在矛盾。 A person possibly thinks oneself have some special characteristics or the values, however their behaviors and performance are actually inconsistent with these special characteristics or the values. This type self- will not usually cause the inner conflicts and distortion consistently, feels inferior, anxious and despondent, the self-doubt and fear and other negativities. 一个人可能认为自己有着某种特质或价值观,但是他们的行为和表现却与这些特质或价值观不一致。这种自我不一致通常会导致内心矛盾和扭曲,自卑、焦虑、抑郁、自我怀疑和恐惧等负面情绪。 Yin Fan has not expected Beirrogo to make Dennis have such mental issue. 尹凡没料到伯洛戈会使丹尼斯产生这样的心理问题。 This like the extreme perfectionist, has filled with the high anticipation to oneself, caused vast gap between the inner feelings and external embodiments, in turn causes a person unable to accept own shortcoming and deficiency, and even collapse. 这就像极端的完美主义者一样,对自己充满过高的期待,导致了内心感受和外在表现之间的巨大差距,进而导致一个人无法接受自己的缺点和不足之处,乃至崩溃。 Why Yin Fan curious Dennis will have such feeling. 尹凡好奇丹尼斯为什么会有这样的感觉。 „When I am young is popular in the Chinese larch town/subdues, I also the prestige is big courageous, is talkative and active, but Beirrogo...... he is an eccentric child, always a person is treating.” “我年轻时在红杉镇内非常受欢迎,我高大又威勐,健谈又活跃,而伯洛戈……他是一个孤僻的孩子,总是一个人待着。” Dennis continues to tell, „I and he have no happening together, but I am very repugnant he.” 丹尼斯继续讲述道,“我和他没有什么交集,但我很讨厌他。” „Why?” “为什么？” „His look.” “他的眼神。” Dennis tries to describe that emotion, but with the evolution of situation, he also recorded unclear all these with the lapse of time quickly because of anything, reviewed, this was so absurd. 丹尼斯试着描述那份情感,但随着时间的推移与事态的演变,他也快记不清这一切因为什么了,回顾一下,这是如此的荒唐。 „Others praise to continue to me, may only have him, he always that indifferent look,” Dennis self-ridicules smiles, „young and impetuous person, is always thinking others 's view, when his appearance looks at me, suffered setbacks like the self-respect.” “别人都对我赞誉不止,可只有他,他总是那副无所谓的眼神,”丹尼斯自嘲地笑了笑,“年轻气盛的人,老是想着他人的看法,当他那副样子看我时,就像自尊心受挫了一样。” „What was makes you have happening together?” “是什么令你们产生了交集？” „War, crazy Wrath of the Scorched Earth, I and Beirrogo enlist in the military together, but also was assigned in one luck, although middle separate, but lived was seeing each other.” “战争,疯狂的焦土之怒,我和伯洛戈一起参军,还幸运地被分配在了一起,虽然中间失散过,但还是活着见到了彼此。” Dennis's narration stopped, he seems like in the organization language is the same, suddenly told that your mood, „ you had had that feeling? Excessively self-confident and proud, producing is ‚lead’ feeling. 丹尼斯的讲述停顿了一下,他像是在组织语言一样,突然自述起了自己的心情,“你有过那种感觉吗？过度的自信与自傲下,产生了一种自己是‘主角’的感觉。 I am this, I experienced the innumerable fight, under the interweaving of blood and fire, the military rank gradually is also promoting, I often fantasized that after the war ended the scene, I will be regarded as the hero, fills with the honor to return. ” 我就是这样,我经历了数不清的战斗,在血与火的交织下,军衔也在逐渐提升,我常幻想战争结束后的情景,我将被视作英雄,满怀着荣誉归来。” Yin Fan said, „you become more and more proud.” 尹凡说,“你变得越来越自傲。” „Right,” Dennis approves said, „I am moving toward the destruction.” “对,”丹尼斯认可地说道,“我正走向毁灭。” „That is a fearsome fight, we just captured the fog deep pool fortress, sets out toward the sacred city, the firepower of enemy is very courageous, the trench proliferates above the scorched earth like the scabs, we pester there must have several months, in the trench is completely the corpse, slough and filthy liquid, mouse that gnaws the food corpse.” “那是一场可怖的战斗,我们刚刚攻陷了雾渊堡垒,朝着神圣之城进发,敌人的火力很勐,堑壕像伤疤一样遍布焦土之上,我们在那里纠缠了得有数月的时间,堑壕里尽是尸体、腐肉、污浊的液体,还有啃食尸体的老鼠。” Dennis child Kong gradually spreads, probably the soul had/left the hole, filled up the suppression fear in the deep place of his eyeground, even crossed so many years, the nightmare was still clearly discernible. 丹尼斯童孔逐渐扩散,像是灵魂出窍了般,在他眼底的深处填满了抑制不住的恐惧,即便过了这么多年,噩梦依旧清晰可见。 „ I often can hear greatly buzz whining noise, that was the fly group passed over gently and swiftly in the battlefield, we innumerable corpse will build outside the trench, treated as the bunker to open fire, sometimes the head of dead to me, his eye child is becoming the grey muddy gelatinous lax, the edge of corner of the eye crawled completely the white maggot...... “我时常能听到巨大的嗡鸣声,那是苍蝇群在战场上掠过,我们将数不清的尸体垒在堑壕外,当做掩体开火,有时候死者的头颅就正对着我,他的眼童涣散成灰色的浑浊胶质,眼角的边缘爬满了白色的蛆虫…… My arrogant mental was ground in that meat grinder hell thoroughly, when the commander command we conduct the charge, I realized, this is the advance that a time must die. ” 我高傲的心智在那绞肉机般的地狱里被彻底碾碎了,当指挥官号令我们进行冲锋时,我意识到,这是一次必死的前进。” Dennis said in a soft voice, „I was afraid.” 丹尼斯轻声道,“我害怕了。” „Continued.” “继续说。” The sound board in Dennis's throat, his expression gradually twisted, has probably anything to from his throat crawl, appearance that his must vomit. 声音卡在了丹尼斯的喉咙里,他的表情逐渐扭曲了起来,像是有什么东西要从他的嗓子里爬出来,他一副要呕吐的模样。 „ I closed the eye, pretends the stupor the appearance, hopes that avoids charging by this, Beirrogo discovered me, he shouts me to get up, leading them to go forward, was I already not such courage. “我闭上了眼,装作昏迷的样子,希望以此避免冲锋,伯洛戈发现了我,他呼喊我起来,带领他们前进,可是我已经没有那样的勇气了。 Trembling that I am afraid, this cannot deceive Beirrogo, according to the regulation, Beirrogo must execute by shooting me, but he does not have, when the commander summoned, he for my circle in this lying, his did not return leaves. ” 我害怕的发抖,这骗不过伯洛戈,按照律法,伯洛戈应当把我枪决,但他没有,指挥官呼唤时,他替我圆上了这个谎,紧接着他头也不回地离开了。” Dennis smiled suddenly hoarsely, „the later matter, everyone knew, these break through the defense line, stepped into the people within sacred city range dead, I instead lived by luck, by the praise, was hung all over the medal.” 丹尼斯突然沙哑地笑了起来,“之后的事,大家都知道了,那些攻破防线,踏入神圣之城范围内的人都死了,我反而侥幸活了下来,备受赞誉,挂满勋章。” „But I know, I should also die in that light, I am not a hero, but is a from head to tail coward.” “但是我知道,我也应该死在那道光里,我不是英雄,而是一个彻头彻尾的胆小鬼。” Dennis's voice was full of the pain and entreaty, „may they manage me to call the hero......” 丹尼斯的声音充满了痛苦与哀求,“可他们都管我叫英雄……” Yin Fan is carefully examining Dennis indifferently, deviation that such that just like he estimates, Dennis's production the enormous self-disunion, individual anticipation and practical action had, twisted his spirit, becomes his nightmare, since has continued. 尹凡冷漠地审视着丹尼斯,正如他揣度的那样,丹尼斯的产生了极大的自我分裂,个人的期待与实际的行动所产生的偏差,扭曲了他的精神,成为了他的噩梦,一直延续至今。 Also so displays through Dennis, Yin Fan can determine, the Beirrogo past was real, he truly came from that already was destroyed the small town. 也是通过丹尼斯如此真实的表现,尹凡可以确定,伯洛戈的过去是真实的,他确确实实来自那个已经被毁灭了的小镇。 „I have thought makes up for Beirrogo, tries to seek for his hometown, told others,” the Dennis pain, „I was really stupid, the Chinese larch town/subdues does not have, everyone died, how I possibly found his hometown.” “我有想过弥补伯洛戈,试着寻找他的家乡,告诉其他人,”丹尼斯痛苦不已,“我真蠢,红杉镇已经没了,所有人都死了,我怎么可能找到他的家乡。” Yin Fan has doubts saying that „hometown? Isn't he Chinese larch town/subdues person?” 尹凡疑惑道,“家乡？他不是红杉镇人吗？” „Beirrogo truly grows in the Chinese larch town/subdues, but most starts, their one is not one of the Chinese larch town/subdues, but from the outside world, as for came from where, his family member has not said that Beirrogo also thinks oneself were was born in the Chinese larch town/subdues. About this part, I also in the old man mouth on town/subdues, knows.” “伯洛戈确实是在红杉镇内成长的,但最开始,他们一家并不是红杉镇的一员,而是来自外界,至于从何而来,他的家人不曾说过,伯洛戈也自以为自己是在红杉镇内出生。关于这部分,我也是在镇上的老者口中,所知晓的。” Dennis's words made the clear riddle again gloomy. 丹尼斯的话语令清晰的谜团再次阴郁了起来。 „Beirrogo is a stranger.” “伯洛戈是位异乡人。”