CGA :: Volume #7

#683: This was too laughable


LNMTL needs user funding to survive Read More

Damn!” “见鬼!” One that Madame Smith rubs stood from the honored guest seat, cheats! He cheated certainly!” 史密斯夫人蹭的一下从嘉宾席上站了起来,“作弊!他一定是作弊了!” Powell and Broome whole face is also vacant, before they had inspected the Chen Guang pencil and blade earnestly, absolutely possibly is not the prepared specially-made equipment! 鲍威尔和布鲁姆也满脸茫然,之前他们已经认真的检查过陈光的铅笔和刀,绝对不可能是事先准备好的特制装备! The audience are the whole face is more vacant. No ball window novel net 观众们更是满脸茫然。【无弹窗小说网】 Recognized Chen Guang can definitely acting cool successful reflection alliance association president Sir also a face compel ignorant, „, although I know that he won, who can explain the principle to me? This special for wool? Did a blade in the past, come out a Eiffel Tower? Selects the solution? For wool? Why? Watt does spurt?” 就连认定了陈光肯定能装逼成功的反光联盟会长大人也一脸懵逼,“虽然我知道他赢定了,但谁能给我讲解一下原理吗?这特么是为毛?一刀过去,就出来一座埃菲尔铁塔?点解?为毛?Why?瓦特哈喷?” The vice-chairman thinks is very long, „is this...... probably the boundary of god?” 副会长想了很久,“这……大概就是神的境界?” Because non- specialized audience unusual many of telecast hall, these joins people that the program records half not to understand the custom for the first time, the sound of talking in whispers continuously, interwines mutually, buzz humming sound the sound gathers, formed the resonance unexpectedly, has pressed in the telecast hall this time fervor dubbing in music that broadcasts, making the entire telecast hall appeared such noise. 由于演播大厅里的非专业观众异乎寻常的多,这些第一次参加节目录制的人大半不太懂规矩,窃窃私语的声音此起彼伏,相互交织在一起,嗡嗡嗡的声音聚集起来,竟形成了共鸣,压过了演播大厅中此时正在播放的激情配乐,让整个演播厅显得是如此的喧闹。 Grandmaster Bell from Australia the discovery is not first right, he approximately takes ten seconds completes a pencil, starts from the competition to present about one -and-a-half points of appearance, he has completed ten pencils. 来自澳大利亚的贝尔大师最先发现不对劲,他大约需要十秒钟的时间完成一支铅笔,从比赛开始到现在大约一分半的样子,他已经完成了十支铅笔。 He could not bear in the short intermittence then looked at eye behind big screen, saw just in time Chen Guang put one pile on desktop has truncated the good pencil big feature article, watt?” 在短暂的间歇他忍不住回头看了眼身后的大荧幕,正巧看到陈光摆在桌面上的一堆已经削好的铅笔大特写,“瓦特?” Then he turns the head to look, discovered Chen Guang on hand not yet passive the pencil only has the last group, was ten. 然后他又转头看去,才发现陈光手边尚未被动过的铅笔只剩下最后一组,也就是十支了。 „! In what? Has he completed 90? The competition started to the present also on the past is less than 100 seconds!” “法克!发生什么了?他已经完成九十支了吗?比赛开始到现在也就过去不到一百秒啊!” Mr. Bell was scared. 贝尔先生吓傻了。 He looks to the position of green mountain Botswanan people, said honestly, ghost's hand is very indeed strong, has completed over 20 by the present, Bieber is quick more than two times, but compares with Chen Guang actually at all not in a level. 他又看向青山博人的位置,坦白说,“鬼之手”的确很强,到现在已经完成了超过二十支,比贝尔自己快出两倍多,但和陈光比起来却根本不在一个层面。 Mountain Botswanan people still look concentrated, on his face is glittering the self-confident brilliance, but at this time and his nearby Chen Guang compares, he is self-confident is actually pitiful. 青山博人依旧神情专注,他的脸上闪烁着自信的光辉,但此时和他旁边的陈光比起来,他越是自信却越是可悲。 In Bell heart wants saying that God, I still am certainly having a dream, making me rest again for one hour, will not have this absurd illusion. 贝尔心中想道,上帝,我一定是还在做梦,让我再睡一个小时,才不会产生这种荒谬的幻觉。 Pitiful mountain mister, pitiful waiters, pitiful I! 可怜的青山先生,可怜的伙计们,可怜的我! We with what monster competition? 我们到底在和一个什么样的怪物比赛? What principle is this? 这是什么原理? Bell sent less than ten seconds of dull of probably, that side Chen Guang left hand has actually put down the last pencil, he lifted up high the right hand to say loudly: Excuse me, all my pencils truncated, can come with 200 pencils to me again?” 大概贝尔发了不到十秒钟的呆,那边陈光左手却已经放下最后一支铅笔,他高举右手大声说着:“不好意思,我所有铅笔都削完了,能再给我拿两百支铅笔过来吗?” A Chen Guang words stone arouses thousand overlapping waves. 陈光的话一石激起千层浪。 Mountain Botswanan people were awakened suddenly, the hand shakes, the knife point even cut the left hand fingertip. 青山博人猛然被惊醒,手一抖,刀尖甚至划破了左手指尖。 His whole face vacant raising the head, turns away to look at Chen Guang, the vision focuses slowly, then falls to him puts entire 100 before body is truncated the good pencil. 他满脸茫然的抬起头来,转脸看着陈光,目光缓缓聚焦,然后又落向他摆在身前的整整一百支被削好的铅笔。 Eight! What is this? 100? Completed?” “八嘎!这是什么?一百支?完成了?” He looked up the countdown on big screen, this just over the past 100 seconds! 他又抬头看了看大荧幕上的倒计时,这才刚过去100秒! He takes a look at oneself front pencil again, 23, mean oneself complete one on average every 4.35 seconds, absolute extraordinary display. 他再瞧瞧自己面前的铅笔,二十三支,意味着自己平均每4.35秒完成一支,绝对的超常发挥。 What did this bastard he make? 可这个混蛋他到底做了什么? Why can like this? 为什么会这样? In what? 发生什么了? The situation that this and I think is completely different! 这和我想的情况完全不一样! Mountain Botswanan people were shocked, he even forgets the present to compete, the subconsciousness wants to put out a hand to take the Chen Guang pencil to inspect. 青山博人惊呆了,他甚至忘了现在正在比赛,下意识想伸手去拿起陈光的铅笔检查一下。 Chen Guang actually one pats his hand, manages well your hand, do not touch my pen.” 陈光却将他的手一把拍开,“管好你的手,别碰我的笔。” For fear that he cannot understand, Chen Guang even deliberately used Japanese. 生怕他听不懂,陈光甚至刻意用上了日语。 Suddenly heard the so standard Japanese, mountain Botswanan people gawked staring, then embarrasedly received to reach behind the back, looks at own table again, is reminding at heart unceasingly, don't be upset, do not fear, his was in truncates intentionally randomly, he is frightening me! 突然听到如此标准的日语,青山博人愣了愣,然后讪讪的收回手去,再看着自己的桌子,心里不断自我提醒着,不要慌,不要怕,他这是在故意乱削,他在吓唬我! At this time, host Dong Qing has held one box of pencil that ran to return to front of Chen Guang, by the small table of spare pencil on place on, how long poured has not waited. 就在这时候,主持人董晴已经一路小跑的抱着一盒铅笔回到陈光面前,备用铅笔就放在旁边的小桌子上,倒也没等多久。 Although wasting for more than ten seconds, but Chen Guang does not care, but will continue to take the pencil to start to truncate. 虽然已经给浪费了十几秒时间,但陈光根本不在乎,而是继续拿起铅笔开始削将起来。 Good truncates pencil matter is very really bored, no matter how blows out to spend, that matter. 好吧削铅笔这事真挺无聊的,不管怎么吹出花来,也就那么一回事。 The left hand takes to begin a stroke, lifts front, then the right hand wields, the knife point pen tip touches instantaneously extremely short, then writing skill bang exploding. 左手拿起笔,举到面前,然后右手挥出去,刀尖笔尖相触的瞬间极为短暂的顿一顿,然后笔头嘭的炸了。 Throws the desktop the pen again, takes up one conveniently, bang, exploded, finished up. 再把笔扔到桌面,顺手拿起一支,嘭,又炸了,完事。 So the reciprocation, is such bored, is such arid, does not dazzle cool, in addition the special skill did not have the means to rescue is so bored. 如此往复,就是这么无聊,就是这么枯燥,就是这么不炫酷,加了特技都没办法救的那么无聊。 Although the average people cannot see clearly his movement, but mountain Botswanan people as ghost's hand, as the Ninja canyon once talent student, his eye were much sharp than the average person. 虽然一般人都根本看不清他的动作,但青山博人作为“鬼之手”,作为忍者峡谷曾经的天才学员,他的眼睛远比一般人锐利得多。 He narrows to focus, looks stubbornly to the Chen Guang pencil lead. 他眯缝着眼,死死看向陈光的笔芯。 He hopes that Chen Guang this is truncating randomly, but the emotion also told him this to be unlikely. 他心里希望陈光这是在乱削,但情感却又告诉他这不太可能。 The powdery sawdust that flash explodes with mixing in these black pencil lead powder in the sawdust is too strange, too specially, this at all not normal truncation badly appearance. 那一瞬间炸出来的粉末状木屑与混在在木屑中那些黑色的笔芯粉末太诡异,太特别,这根本不是正常的削坏了的样子。 Wait, in his knife point contacts the writing skill that instantaneous, probably his hand became fuzzy, when like the beforehand old teletron television voltage was not steady the picture. 等等,在他的刀尖接触到笔头的那瞬间,好像他的手变得模糊了一些,就像以前老显像管电视电压不稳时的画面。 This is...... 这是…… Chen Guang is preparing to put down the pen, actually stares to this fellow look very much not comfortably, turns the head to visit him, „don't you play? Do your oneself also truncate? Always stares at me to do the wool? Asked me, am I letting you? Are you bored?” 陈光正准备放下笔,却给这家伙眼神盯得很不舒坦,转头看着他,“你是不玩了吧?你自己还削不削的?老盯着我搞毛?求我,我让着你啊?你无聊吗?” Then, the Chen Guang no longer bird he , to continue to truncate own. 说完,陈光又不再鸟他,继续削着自己的。 This mountain Botswanan people are really miserable, but also ghost's hand, was frightened urinated the appearance.” “这个青山博人真惨,还‘鬼之手’呢,一副被吓尿了的样子。” Cannot say, he is very fierce, but truncates the pencil movement to give people the passing clouds and flowing water feeling.” “也不能这么说,他真的很厉害,只是削个铅笔动作都给人行云流水般的感觉。” Where do you stand? Chinese?” “你到底站哪边的?是不是中国人?” WTF, if can change the nationality I really thank you! This mud bang person, is fierce, but he cannot withstand a versatile elder brother's blade class/flow! Fuck, I think from the start does not understand what exactly happened well?” 卧槽,如果这么就能改国籍我真是谢谢您了啊!这个泥轰人吧,是厉害,但他顶不住全能哥的一刀流嘛!尼玛,我压根想不明白到底发生了什么好吧?” Also right, mountain Botswanan people are fierce are also only an average person, supporting is a ghost, versatile elder brother, attained the view in game is the ultra god!” “也对,青山博人再厉害也只是个普通人,撑死了算个鬼,全能哥这一手,拿到游戏里的说法就是超神了!” Whispering on auditorium got stronger and stronger, but this time Director king has not actually jumped to remind everyone again calmly, he knows that oneself said anything no matter uses, at the worst later deafen. 观众席上的交头接耳愈演愈烈了,但这次王主任却没有再跳出来提醒大家冷静点,他知道自己说什么都不管用,大不了后期消音得了。 The mountain Botswanan people fist grips closely, he goes all out to think. 青山博人拳头攥得紧紧的,他拼命想着。 I cannot manage him again. 我不能再管他了。 I must control my rhythm. 我必须掌控自己的节奏。 This certainly is the illusion, he is certainly teasing me to play! 这一定是幻觉,他一定是在逗我玩! Mountain Botswanan people swung the head ruthlessly, then continues truncation whole-heartedly. 青山博人狠狠的摇了摇脑袋,然后又继续全力以赴的削将起来。 He had not noticed that on other same stretch/open long table Smith jewelry staff have put down the blade and pen in hand, but turns the head dull looks at behind the big screen. 他并没有留意到同一张长桌上的其他史密斯珠宝员工们早已放下了手里的刀和笔,而是转头呆呆的看着身后大荧幕。 No one has patted the mountain Botswanan people again, on the big screen is Chen Guang this arid dull movement, thank brand-new supervelocity camera that Guinness column group just replaced, after a series of aggressive emergency mixes, slowed down hundred times starts to appear by the frame analysis picture on the big screen. 已经没人再拍青山博人了,大荧幕上一直都是陈光这枯燥乏味的动作,感谢吉尼斯栏目组刚更换的全新超高速摄像头,在经过一系列紧锣密鼓的应急调配之后,一段被放慢了百倍的逐帧分析画面开始出现在大荧幕上。 Contacts the writing skill to start from the Chen Guang knife point, is wielding departure to his knife point again, this less than 0.3 seconds of lens, were elongated for 30 seconds. 陈光的刀尖接触到笔头开始,再到他的刀尖挥动着离开,这不到零点三秒的镜头,被拉长到了三十秒。 People saw clearly a point finally indistinctly, the knife point like cutting the tofu truncate at the extremely quick speed write one's first poem the wooden casing that the head wrapped. 人们终于隐约看清楚了一点,刀尖以极快的速度如同切豆腐般削开笔头上包裹的木壳。 The knife point draws back enters, draws back again enters again, simultaneously the pencil revolves in his left hand, but all these happen too quickly, the Chen Guang movement scope is minimum , the frequency is extremely quick, creates the sign that barked to be hewn powdery then to collapse to disperse. 刀尖一退一进,再退再进,同时铅笔在他左手旋转,只是这一切都发生得太快,陈光的动作幅度极小,却又频率极快,才造成了木皮被削成粉末状进而崩散开来的迹象。 Again then, is the neat pen tip works loose to bark the fetter to appear with the help of Chen Guang in the air, outlines of four blade Eiffel Tower vividly, what is truly fearful is the operation of this time Chen Guang. 再然后,是规整的笔尖在陈光的帮助下挣脱木皮束缚出现在空气中,唰唰四刀埃菲尔铁塔的轮廓跃然而出,真正可怕的是此时陈光的操作。 His hand high-frequency vibrates again, the knife point arrives on the pen tip, from top to bottom passes on, the Eiffel Tower symbolic carriage trace appears rapidly. 他的手再度高频震动,刀尖抵在笔尖上,从上往下推移而上,埃菲尔铁塔标志性的支撑架纹路迅速浮现。 Each trace is extremely clear, neat, what is most essential, this is increases speed 100 times by the frame analysis, but in the picture seems like is still quick! 每一道纹路都极度清晰,规整,最关键的是,这是提速一百倍的逐帧分析,但画面里看起来却依然很快! The entire journey 0.3 seconds pass by, the iron tower bottom stub hollows out takes shape completely, the perfect Eiffel Tower intricate carvings handicrafts come out freshly. 全程零点三秒过去,铁塔底部支脚镂空完全成型,完美的埃菲尔铁塔微雕手工艺品新鲜出炉。 This means that Chen Guang truncates a pen actually only to need to spend for 0.3 seconds, other time waste actually most probably, in put at pen matter with. 这意味着陈光削出一支笔其实只需要花零点三秒,其余时间倒是大半都浪费在了拿笔放笔这种事情上。 After the slow mirror replay ended, the picture restores to the picture that Chen Guang that blade explodes. 当慢镜重放结束后,画面又恢复到陈光那一刀一爆的画面。 The speed union, the feeling especially is crisply sour. 快慢结合,感受格外酸爽。 In all person hearts finally assured, this fellow has not really acted unreasonably, this goods are really completely an unreasonable blade class/flow! 所有人心中终于笃定,这家伙真没乱来,这货真就是完全不讲道理的一刀流! At this time the condition of mountain Botswanan people, seeming like particularly was pitiful. 此时青山博人的状态,看起来就分外可怜了。 He takes undivided attention, looks concentrated, a blade blade is rhythmical, the quick-moving and accurate, others look like an artware. 他心无旁骛,神情专注,一刀一刀有板有眼,动作迅速而又精准,他人就像是个艺术品。 However there is no egg to use. 然而这并没有什么卵用。 After waiting competed to end, if he discovered pencil that Chen Guang truncated really completely qualified, perhaps will suspect the life then fell insanely? 等比赛结束之后,他如果发现陈光削出来的铅笔真全部合格,恐怕会怀疑人生进而疯掉的吧? If not thinking his vote veto, Malena * Smith has left probably ahead of time. 如果不是想着自己的一票否决权,玛丽安娜*史密斯大概已经提前走人了。 Is impossible, this certainly is the illusion, otherwise they cheated certainly!” The woman of quality who this shakes the circle is saying with clenched jaws. “不可能,这一定是幻觉,不然他们一定作弊了!”这名震社交圈的贵妇咬牙切齿的说着。 Director......” “理事长……” Powell you shuts up, your waste, are you authentication officer like this? Gives him to be in front of our to cheat?” Madame Smith stared Powell one eyes wickedly. “鲍威尔你闭嘴,你这个废物,你就是这样当认证官的?给他当着我们的面作弊?”史密斯夫人恶狠狠的瞪了鲍威尔一眼。 Powell mouth pulls out, has started to scold at heart. 鲍威尔嘴一抽,心里已经开始骂了起来。 Was you regarded you here in the model circle of Europe and US, seeing the beautiful male to pull up, pulls up you to make us run about to feel embarrassed him to you motionless. 是你把这儿当成了你在欧美的模特圈,看见美男就想撩,撩不动了你又让我们给你跑腿为难他。 Good, looks in this is the matter in Guinness rules and regulations, I tacitly approved. 好吧,看在这本就是吉尼斯规章制度内的事情,我默认了。 Now is Chen Guang is too obviously fearful, your company these employees are not a big help, do you actually throw my head the issue? 现在明明是陈光太可怕,你公司那些员工根本不顶事,你却把问题扔到我头上来? Really is beyond control Powell not to choke with rage, Madame Smith must run around in circles his director over the two days, in the end oneself actually give back to her to shame at will, you left go too far! 实在由不得鲍威尔不窝火,史密斯夫人这两天把他指挥得团团转,到头来自己却还给她随意羞辱,你别太过分了! You are Malena, is not Elizabeth! 你是玛丽安娜,不是伊丽莎白! Finally, when the countdown arrives the last second, Chen Guang stops the hand, he seemingly has nothing actually unusually, the look is tranquil, the surface such as stops the water steadily, both hands holds in the pants pocket. 终于,当倒计时走到最后一秒,陈光才停下手来,他倒是看起来没有任何异常,神色平静,面如止水,双手平稳的揣在裤兜里。 Is placed in front of him, is pencil that entire 300 were just truncated. 摆在他面前的,是刚好整整三百支被削出来的铅笔。 mountain Botswanan people tremble, being sweating profusely, the cheeks are pale, in the longing putting down hand the blade, the front approximately suspended more than 60 pens, but about 20 paid to truncate. 青山博人哆嗦着手,满头大汗,脸颊苍白,依依不舍的放下手中刀,前方大约摆了六十余支笔,但其中大约有二十支给削断了。 He is not willing to turn head to look to the Chen Guang direction, he is afraid sees the nightmarish scene. 他不太愿意扭头向陈光的方向看去,他害怕看到噩梦般的场景。 But he is unable to avoid eventually, once for a while turns away to look around Chen Guang position like being a thief, then painful covering forehead. 可他终究无法回避,时不时像做贼一样转脸看着旁边陈光的位置,然后痛苦的捂住额头。 I fantasy. 我活见鬼了。 The time reverses, the memory as if returned to yesterday, oneself also lay on the bed, was discussing with the wife opened a branch store again. 时光倒转,记忆仿佛回到昨天,自己还躺在床上,正和妻子商量着再开一家分店。 Perhaps was I was too tired, therefore is chatting fell asleep, I now certainly also in dream, right, when I awoke, this nightmare ended. 或许是我太累了,所以聊着天就睡着了,我现在一定还在梦里,没错,等我睡醒,这场噩梦就结束了。 , He thought gradually oneself head gets better heavy. 渐渐的,他觉得自己的脑袋变得好沉重。 His spirit is getting more and more absent-minded, assumes an air of self approbation, in the eye the fog misty piece, in the telecast hall at this time about thousand audience cried out excitedly actually changes to the nightmare shouting of monster, deafening, probably was sealed up in his mind, the echo, is everywhere getting more and more grating, is louder, as if must blast open his head. 他的精神越来越恍惚,摇头晃脑,眼睛里雾蒙蒙一片,演播大厅里此时近千观众兴奋的呐喊却化作噩梦里怪兽的嘶吼,震耳欲聋,像是被封闭在了他的脑海里,四处回响,越来越刺耳,越大声,仿佛要把他的脑袋生生炸裂。 I lost. 我输了。 Radical losing? 彻彻底底的输了? Strength that I have not struggled, I am not the opponent of this monster. 我根本就没有挣扎的力量,我也根本就不是这个怪物的对手。 He is not human. 他不是人类。 Is right, he is the devil in my dream. 是的没错,他是我梦中的恶魔。 I lost to the devil in oneself dream. 我输给自己梦里的恶魔了。 All right, lets I sleeping well, I will disappear from this laughable stage. 没事,让我再好好的睡一觉,我就会从这个可笑的舞台上消失。 His both hands press down, supports stubbornly on the table, points at the joint blanch, a while opens eyes, a while closes one's eyes, the nose is shrugging, the expression is somewhat fierce. 他双手按下,死死撑在桌子上,手指骨节发白,一会儿睁眼,一会儿闭眼,鼻子耸动着,表情有些狰狞。 Two hosts actually do not know that the condition of mountain Botswanan people are unusual, once again stands the onstage, starts to invite Powell and Broome two authentication officer going points and inspections. 两名主持人却并不知道青山博人的状态异常,又一次站上前台,开始邀请鲍威尔与布鲁姆两位认证官前去点数与检查。 Actually this does not have the significance, if mountain Botswanan people are controlling the person of the world record, then Chen Guang proposed 78 times of gods the world record ruthlessly upward. 其实这根本毫无意义,如果青山博人是掌控着世界记录的人,那么陈光就是把世界记录狠狠往上提了七八倍的神。 That side cameraman has pushed the instrument to depend, specially-made micro camera optional is choosing the focus photography in these 300 iron tower pencil leads, each that perfect, impeccable. 那边摄像师已经推着仪器靠了过去,特制的显微摄像头随意的在这三百支铁塔笔芯里挑选着聚焦拍摄,每一根都是那么的完美,无可挑剔。 Chen Guang clapping holds, is disinclined to greet with others, rests selfish sitting the chair that on to the side player, prepares to curl upwards one leg on the other, thinks that this is the recording set, he endured. 陈光拍拍手掌,都懒得和其他人打招呼,自顾自的坐到旁边选手休息的椅子上,准备翘个二郎腿,想到这是节目录制现场,他忍了。 Powell and Broome have no alternative, must take the high-power magnifying glass to mount the stage respectively, even if not willing to acknowledge at heart, they were impossible to talk irresponsibly to say the iron tower that Chen Guang truncated did not attain a designated standard. 鲍威尔和布鲁姆没奈何,只得各自拿着高倍放大镜上台,哪怕心里再不愿意承认,他们也不可能信口雌黄说陈光削出来的铁塔不达标。 Because the pencil were too many, we select the method of spot-check, I and Mr. Broome everyone inspect 20, if altogether 40 do not have the issue, then the challenge of Chen Guang is naturally successful.” “因为铅笔实在太多了,我们就采用抽查的方式吧,我与布鲁姆先生每人检查二十支,如果一共四十支没有问题,那么陈光的挑战自然就是成功的。” Powell only wants quickly to end this farce, remembers the beforehand matter, remembers Chen Guang to look again when oneself and Madame Smith that disdaining look. 鲍威尔只想尽快结束这场闹剧,想起之前的事情,再想起陈光看自己和史密斯夫人时那种不屑的眼神。 Powell felt, oneself these people seem like in the clown who in front of God makes threatening gestures. 鲍威尔觉得,自己这些人好像是在上帝面前张牙舞爪的小丑。 This was too laughable. 这太可笑了。 The challenge pattern radically is a joke.( To be continued.) 挑战模式根本就是个笑话。(未完待续。)
To display comments and comment, click at the button