YID :: Volume #9

#809: Hoisting jack and air pump

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Has to ask a ticket! Stamps also good. Now the bill were too few, can give a millet eruption fervor? 不得不求个票！盖个章也行啊。现在票票真的太少了,能给小米一点爆发激情么？ ================ ================ As the man, no one wants to become a spare tire. But what is essential, the most men are the visual animal . Moreover the vision is very nitpicking, but the goddess quantity is much more than dinosaur, therefore is inevitable, many men will degenerate into the pitiful spare tire. The only difference lies, some spare tires do not know oneself is a spare tire, but some men are actually willing into the spare tire. 作为男人,谁都不想成为备胎。但关键的是,绝大部分男人都是视觉动物,而且视觉还挺挑剔的,但女神的数量远远大于恐龙,所以不可避免的,很多男人就会沦为可怜的备胎。唯一的差别在于,有的备胎并不知道自己是备胎,而有的男人却是心甘情愿成为备胎。 As the spare tire, is not the most pitiful matter, because the spare tire has the use after all, when the goddess bitter experience sentiment changes, needs to comfort, the function of spare tire appears. However, the spare tire is still frail, because the spare tire is to listen to her pours out endlessly that regarding the goddess value compared with Aunt king the footbinding cloths must bad and long the emotion story. This emotion story with spare tire irrelevant, main actor has someone else. 作为备胎,并不是最悲惨的事情,因为备胎毕竟还是有用途的,当女神遭遇情变的时候,需要安慰的时候,备胎的作用就显现出来。不过,备胎依然是脆弱的,因为备胎对于女神的价值就是听她倾诉那没完没了比王大娘裹脚布还要又臭又长地情感故事。偏偏,这个情感故事跟备胎无关,男一号另有其人。 What is more miserable, when goddess gets drunk scolded one „such and such this king 0.8 eggs, old lady anything gave him, he also dared...... this kind of words unexpectedly” time, the qualified spare tire must meet one immediately, „such and such did not know to treasure, that was he was blind”. 更惨的是,当女神喝醉的时候骂了一句“某某这个王0.8蛋,老娘什么都给他了,他居然还敢……”这类话的时候,合格的备胎立即还要接一句,“某某不知道珍惜,那是他瞎眼了”。 Does not have the means that this by meaning that the spare tire has. As spare tire, you, or listens to the story and vent that these sentiments change, that absolutely does not have the existence value. 没办法啊,这就是被备胎存在的意义啊。作为备胎,你要不听这些情变的故事和发泄,那就完全没有存在价值。 The bitterness of spare tire, it can be imagined. 备胎的惨痛,可想而知了。 However, Qin Lang said unexpectedly also has compared with a spare tire more miserable role, this makes Tao Ruoxiang feel that was very curious, therefore she hurries to closely examine the result. 不过,秦朗居然说还有比备胎更惨的角色,这就让陶若香感到很好奇了,所以她赶紧追问结果。 „Is more miserable than the spare tire, naturally was the hoisting jack.” Qin Lang answered with a smile, „you think, driving time, must change the spare tire time, can with the hoisting jack? No matter the goddess spare tire has used, the hoisting jack has on the top the qualifications of spare tire, not?” “比备胎更惨的,当然是千斤顶了。”秦朗笑着解释道,“你想想,开车的时候,要换备胎的时候,是不是要用千斤顶？女神的备胎不管用了,千斤顶才有顶上备胎的资格,不是么？” Listened to Qin Lang this saying, Tao Ruoxiang to smile very much, but felt that some did not do for the occasion, oneself present should depressed be very right obviously. 听了秦朗这话,陶若香很想笑,但是感觉有些不应景,自己现在明明应该很郁闷才对。 Qin Lang sees Tao Ruoxiang not to smile, thought Teacher Tao smiles really high, but I do not believe to tease do not laugh at you. Therefore, Qin Lang then said: „Actually, is the man, spare tire and hoisting jack, are not most awful, ratio these two titles are more miserable.” 秦朗见陶若香没笑,心想陶老师的笑点真高,不过我就不信逗不笑你。于是,秦朗接着说道:“其实,做男人,备胎、千斤顶,都不是最糟糕的,还有比这两个称号更惨的。” „What is that?” Tao Ruoxiang asked. “那又是什么？”陶若香问道。 „Air pump.” “打气筒。” Qin Lang answered seriously, „hoisting jack, had the opportunity of forcing up. This air pump, you know when can apply? That is ‚having an abortion’ time is useful.” 秦朗一本正经地解释道,“千斤顶,都还有顶上去的机会。这打气筒,你知道什么时候才能派上用场么？那就是‘打胎’的时候才用得上。” Tao Ruoxiang stares first, then understood suddenly smiling of Qin Lang this saying, then also cannot help laughs, but this eruption, Student Qin Lang has met immediately with a disaster, by Tao Ruoxiang spurting beer of face. 陶若香先是一愣,然后忽地明白了秦朗这话的笑点,再也忍不住大笑起来,不过她这一爆发,秦朗同学顿时就遭殃了,被陶若香给喷了一脸的啤酒。 Had been spurted a face spittle, no one will be comfortable, but spurts only from the Beauty mouth, no matter is the spittle or the beer, how will not think disgustingly. Therefore Student Qin Lang point vitality/angry, instead smilingly has not looked at Tao Ruoxiang, waited for that her slender finger takes the paper goods to wipe the face to him. 被人喷了一脸唾沫星子,谁都不会舒坦,但惟独从美女口中喷出来的,甭管是唾沫星子还是啤酒,都不会觉得怎么恶心。所以秦朗同学没有一点生气,反而笑眯眯地看着陶若香,等待她纤细的手指拿着纸巾给他擦脸。 …… …… Qin Lang knows oneself should not appear prematurely that having fun expression, can only put out a hand to meet the paper goods that Tao Ruoxiang hands over, but he actually took advantage of opportunity on the palm of Tao Ruoxiang has traced, and had the feeling of little static electricity. 秦朗知道自己不应该过早地将那种乐在其中的表情显现出来,只能伸手去接陶若香递过来的纸巾,不过他却顺势在陶若香的手掌上摸了一把,并且带起了一点点静电的感觉。 Tao Ruoxiang stared Qin Lang one, but looks at this guy smilingly appearance, she did not have the means. Before also „Teacher Tao” status time, Tao Ruoxiang can also „town” live in Qin Lang this Brat reluctantly, but she discovered that now she seemed to be getting more and more weak to Qin Lang this guy deterrent. 陶若香瞪了秦朗一眼,不过看这家伙嬉皮笑脸地样子,她已经没办法了。以前还有一个“陶老师”的身份的时候,陶若香还能勉强“镇”住秦朗这小子,但是现在她发现自己对秦朗这家伙的威慑性似乎越来越弱了。 Luckily, Qin Lang also knows that cannot openly excessively challenge the Tao Ruoxiang face, therefore he is suddenly proper: „Joke listened, Aunt Tao your was also happy, now can say why you were depressed? Right, determined that is not because the sentiment changes, if so, I dodge the person immediately, I do not think, when spare tire.” 幸好,秦朗也知道不能公然过度挑战陶若香的面子,所以他忽地正经起来:“笑话听了,陶姨你的心情也好了,现在可以说说你为何郁闷了吧？对了,确定不是因为情变吧,如果是的话,我立马闪人,我可不想当备胎。” „Relax, you are not a spare tire.” Tao Ruoxiang also said resolutely, while convenient added one, „your air pump is not!” “放心,你不是备胎。”陶若香也正色道,顺便加了一句,“你连打气筒都算不上！” „...... I felt relieved.” “呵……那我就放心了。” Just like Qin Lang expects, Tao Ruoxiang drinks the alcohol to drown one's sorrows, but to not scatter drunk, therefore she is not the bitter experience sentiment changes, but has encountered in the work is not satisfactory. 正如秦朗所料,陶若香只是喝闷酒,但不是为了撒酒疯,所以她不是遭遇情变,而只是遭遇了工作上的不顺心。 Originally, Tao Ruoxiang had been admitted to the Policeman system official, this matter has been settled with the help of Qin Lang. However, when the Tao Ruoxiang preparation starts to give full play, the accidental/surprised matter actually occurred: 原本,陶若香考入了警察系统公务员,这事在秦朗的帮助下已经板上钉钉子了。但是,就在陶若香准备开始大显身手的时候,意外的事情却发生了: Because she is the novice adds girl, and inexperienced also needs to strengthen the reason of exercise, was loaned out to go to work to other departments temporarily, making her not have the means to participate to handle a case completely. 她因为是新手加女生,且经验不足还需要加强锻炼的原因,被暂时借调到其它部门上班,让她完全没办法参与办案。 „My Aunt Tao, you for this matter vitality/angry?” Qin Lang said that „, although this matter indeed somewhat cancels the enthusiasm, but this should be the normal procedure.” “我的陶姨,你就为了这事生气？”秦朗道,“虽然这事的确有些打消积极性,不过这应该是正常程序吧。” „Is normal! Did not think that I am the womenfolk, should be essential I will not carry out the relations, therefore intentionally pushes aside me.” A Tao Ruoxiang appearance, as if received huge feel wronged indignantly. “正常个屁！不就是觉得我是女流之辈,最关键应该是我不会搞关系,所以就故意排挤我吧。”陶若香一副义愤填膺地样子,似乎受了天大委屈。 …… …… This issue as if makes Tao Ruoxiang difficult, therefore she has drunk liquor, resentfully said: „City Patriotic Health Campaign Committee! You know that makes me do? Makes me send the propaganda pamphlet and ratsbane to various units and communities, extinguishes the cockroach except the mouse, moreover unexpectedly also has the target! Not only need distribute many raticide, but actually must record to extinguish many kilogram mice and cockroach, this also has the damn target unexpectedly!” 这个问题似乎让陶若香难以启齿,所以她又喝了一口酒,才忿忿不平地说:“市爱卫会！你知道让我干嘛？就让我发宣传单、耗子药给各单位、小区,除老鼠、灭蟑螂,而且居然还有指标！不仅要分发多少的灭鼠药,而且还要记录究竟灭了多少公斤的老鼠、蟑螂,这个居然也有该死的指标！” „......” “呃……” Student Qin Lang understood feel wronged of Teacher Tao Ruoxiang finally. Obviously is the Criminal Investigation outstanding student, is loaned out to exercise to other unit, unexpectedly such „mysterious department”, how does not make her have a headache. 秦朗同学终于明白了陶若香老师的委屈。明明是刑侦的高材生,借调到别的单位去锻炼也就罢了,居然还是这样的“神秘部门”,如何不让她头疼呢。 „Aunt Tao, I thought that you should see through.” In order to comfort Tao Ruoxiang, Qin Lang racked brains to find has smiled, „I thought that you should think, why you did join the Policeman system? Isn't rids the people of an evil? You enter the Patriotic Health Campaign Committee now, is rids the people of an evil. Moreover, ‚eliminates four harmfuls’, is imposing!” “陶姨,我觉得你应该看开一点。”为了安慰陶若香,秦朗绞尽脑汁找到了一些笑点,“我觉得你应该这么想,你加入警察系统为什么？不就是为民除害么？你现在进入爱卫会,也是为民除害啊。而且,还是‘除四害’,多威风啊！” Except the four harmfuls, naturally is removes the mouse, cockroach, mosquito and fly, this is one of the Patriotic Health Campaign Committee key emphases. If Qin Lang has not listened to Zheng Yingwen to mention tonight, he does not know that also has like this mysterious department. 除四害,自然就是除掉老鼠、蟑螂、蚊子、苍蝇,这就是爱卫会的重点工作之一。如果今天晚上秦朗没听郑颖纹提到的话,他都不知道还有这样的神秘部门。 „Power and prestige, power and prestige your head!” Tao Ruoxiang scolded, „was really mindless guy, making you comfort several, you know unexpectedly teased!” “威风,威风你个头啊！”陶若香骂道,“真是没心没肺的家伙,让你安慰几句,你居然就知道取笑！” „Who said that I have not comforted you, you did not think that now the mood are quite many?” Qin Lang still bold smiles. “谁说我没安慰你,难道你不觉得现在心情好很多了？”秦朗依然没皮没脸地笑。 „Yes, my present was happy, because you are my ‚air pump’, inflates to me specially.” “是,我现在心情好了,因为你就是我的‘打气筒’嘛,专门给我打气。” „This is not funny, unlucky!” Qin Lang snort/hum, he not whose thought some day becomes „air pump”. “这可不好笑,晦气！”秦朗哼了一声,他不想有朝一日成为谁的“打气筒”。 It looks like in Qin Lang, the air pump and becomes the father to be equally sorrowful happily. 在秦朗看来,打气筒和喜当爹一样悲哀。 „Said that also strange, the recent mouse specially are probably many.” Qin Lang said one suddenly with deep feelings, matter that because talks to the person Qin Lang awareness to tonight suddenly, seems related with the mouse. “说起来也奇怪,最近的老鼠好像特别多呢。”秦朗忽地深有感触地说了一句,因为秦朗忽地意识到今天晚上自己跟人谈的事情,似乎都跟老鼠有关。
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