Chapter 19 commits suicide also fights 第19章自杀也是战斗 A person must kill itself, can choose the innumerable methods, the richness of this choice at least needs to go far beyond the federal the egg white meat variety. 一个人要杀死自己,可以选择无数种方法,这种选择的丰富性至少要远远超过联邦的蛋白肉品种。 A grass rope, a fruit knife, one string of golden chains, settle a life of person sufficiently, even if you do not have the grass rope also to have the shoelace, without the fruit knife can also sort the rust nail, without the golden chain always has regulus, in this world takes a broad view to look let alone is the tall building low building gulf shallow holes mountain hill big tree young tree highly is deep enough to existence that the person dies. 一根草绳,一把水果刀,一串黄金链,都足以了结一个人的性命,就算你没草绳还有鞋带,没水果刀还能拣颗锈钉子,没黄金链总有金属块儿,更何况这个世界上放眼望去都是高楼低楼深坑浅坑大山小山大树小树高度深度足够致人死的存在。 Even if, even if you are seeking that instantaneous luck rotten unable to look for anything to anything unable to see, you always return have tongue- perhaps bites the tongue to commit suicide has too much women's wrongs aura, however in the death front, what method was actually equal. 即便,即便你在求死那瞬间运气烂到什么都找不着什么都看不到,你总归还有舌头-咬舌自尽或许有太多闺怨气息,然而在死亡的面前,其实什么手段都是平等的。 Therefore , the suicide is not a difficult matter. 所以说,自杀并不是一件难事。 The Huai Caoshi youth is the empire keeps aloof, if hot sun dazzling red glowing sun, after the puberty, collects radiance to walk in the imperial palace military headquarters, in recent years was in charge of the work of imperial information bureau silent in secret, has looked mammoth daringly, Yin filthy ruthless spicy cruel has looked dark, as always the innermost feelings and body synchronization are powerful. 怀草诗少时是帝国高高在上若烈日般眩目的红日,青春期后自敛光华行走于皇宫军部之间,近年来沉默地暗中主持着皇家情报署的工作,波澜壮阔气吞山河看过,阴秽狠辣残忍黑暗看过,一如既往地内心与身体同步强大。 Regarding such character, does not have the difficulty event like suicide this type, should not create she too many difficulties, when she noticed that the Xu Le mouth spurts the black blood to fall down straightly when picture, the powerful heart could not bear palpitate unexpectedly. 对于这样的人物来说,像自杀这种没有难度的事件,本不应该造成她太多的困扰,然而当她看到许乐口喷黑血直挺挺摔倒在地的画面时,强悍的心脏竟是忍不住悸动了一丝。 Because time is not right. 因为时间点不对。 Carefully has studied after Xu Le all material files, Huai Caoshi had never suspected this person has to kill own courage, however has not arrived at the last minute, why will he so choose to end oneself life resolutely? 仔细研究过关于许乐的所有资料档案后,怀草诗从未怀疑过此人有杀死自己的勇气,然而还没有到最后一刻,为什么他就会如此毅然决然地选择结束自己的生命？ „You should also many questions need the answer, why was resigned to commit suicide?” “你应该还有很多疑问需要答案,为什么就甘心自杀了？” She looks that was encircled by the medical personnel in central that federal man, the eye narrowed the eyes. 她看着被医务人员围在中央的那个联邦男人,眼睛眯了起来。 „Your highness.” The empire medical officers report to say in a low voice: „According to the check result, his lung haematoma was serious, fierce of respiratory failure, if needed him to live, must return to the ground to rescue immediately.” “殿下。”帝国军医官低声汇报道:“根据刚才的检查结果,他的肺血肿非常严重,呼吸衰竭的厉害,如果需要他活着,必须马上送回地面进行抢救。” „What are you still hesitating?” Huai Caoshi is frowning to look at the medical officer saying: „What on execution grounds needs is a living federal war hero, rather than a corpse.” “那你们还在迟疑什么？”怀草诗皱着眉头看着军医官说道:“刑场上需要的是一个活生生的联邦战斗英雄,而不是一具尸体。” „What now issue is, even if the luck good saves this person, he does not have the means to stand again.” “但现在问题的是,就算运气不错把这个人救活,他也没有办法再站起来。” The medical officers wiped the perspiration on forehead, his medical team provided enough tester, therefore the injury of very clear this federal captive is how much, there is many...... strange. 军医官抹了抹额头上的汗,他的医疗小组配备了足够的检查设备,所以非常清楚这个联邦俘虏的伤势有多重,有多……怪异。 „The nerve bunch in his body is perfect, the nerve pivot shaft under muscle double textile fiber key ties also does not have any issue, but why does not know, his time nerve say/way passed as if lost the function, probably was the same, we could not find the issue, therefore...... simply did not have the means to restore.” “他身体里的神经束完好无损,肌肉双纤维键下的神经枢结也没有任何问题,但不知道为什么,他此时的神经道通似乎失去了作用,像是断了一样,我们找不到问题,所以……根本没有办法修复好。” „What is the best result?” Huai Caoshi hangs the view to ask. “最好的结果是什么？”怀草诗微垂眼帘问道。 „Whole body paralysis.” The medical officers replied in a low voice. “全身瘫痪。”军医官低声回答道。 The Huai Caoshi silent moment, walks toward the bedside, the busy empire military doctors hurry to make way a path, is listening to the instrument sound, she arrives at both hands back slowly behind, looks to come to the verge of death Xu Le, that pair of straight eyebrow is slightly pressed, suddenly points at finds out like lightning, forcibly place in the Xu Le chest place. 怀草诗沉默片刻,向床边走去,忙碌的帝国军医们赶紧让开一条道路,听着嘀嘀的仪器响声,她将双手缓缓背到身后,看着濒临死亡的许乐,那双直眉微微蹙起,忽然间手指如闪电般探出,用力地点在许乐的胸口处。 Pū a dull thumping sound, Xu Le of heavy stupor has no response. 噗的一声闷响,重度昏迷的许乐没有任何反应。 „Unexpectedly ignores my warning, attempted the meridians linked, was really dies did not fear that...... the courage of your fellow was really big enough.” “居然不顾我的警告,试图把断了的经脉重新连起来,真是连死都不怕……你这个家伙的胆子果然够大。” Huai Caoshi takes back the finger, Moroccan suo is referring to the abdomen gently, confirmed the unerring judgement of medical officer, front small eye man general this whole life will not stand again. 怀草诗收回手指,轻轻摩娑着指腹,确认了军医官的判断无误,面前这个小眼睛男人大概这辈子都不会再站起来了。 She remembered in mulberry tree into the sea|nautical mile these continuous escapes and fights of incessantly, does not recall with deep feeling, will not be moved, because she always does not have the slight sympathy to the enemy, only thought that was somewhat a pity. 她想起了在桑树海里的那些连绵不止的逃亡与战斗,并不感怀,更不会伤感,因为她对敌人向来没有丝毫同情心,只觉得有些可惜。 In this universe has the qualifications is not many with the person who she fights side-by-side, once with the person who she fought side-by-side is only then a Xu Le person of spitting blood stupor, the machine fought the coordination of first under heaven and machine repair first under heaven, was what shocking pleased fight picture, from now henceforth, will not have probably. 这个宇宙里有资格与她并肩作战的人不多,曾经与她并肩作战的人更是只有吐血昏迷的许乐一人,机战天下第一和机修天下第一的配合,是何等样惊艳快意的战斗画面,从今以后,大概再也不会有了。 „Delivers to an sovereign institute, adjusts the imperial special camp to be responsible for guarding.” After Huai Caoshi hangs the eye of ponder moment, made the decision, „saves him as far as possible.” “送到皇一院,调皇家特种营负责看守。”怀草诗垂目思考片刻后做了决定,“尽可能地救活他。” The empire for hundred years the first aristocrat rebellion, results from the aristocrat regarding the anxiety shock of imperial family, this mood resulted from the strange death of slow county king, now this rebellion will soon vanish into thin air, however must give up the anxiety of huge upper class especially those neutral aristocrat heart completely scared...... 帝国百年来第一次的贵族叛乱,起于贵族对于皇室的疑虑震惊,这种情绪又起于卡顿郡王的离奇死亡,如今这场叛乱即将烟消云散,然而要完全打消庞大的贵族阶层尤其是那些中立贵族内心深处的疑虑恐慌…… The imperial family really needs one living Xu Le, then dies to the people looks. 皇室很需要一个活着的许乐,然后死给众人看。 In many people branches or the popular science of books academy of science will mention are on the verge of death the experience, said that human will review one in that flash that the death approached at the maximum speed next in the past, feels one next now, forecast, sorry, here will not have the future, high-speed retreat hole that only then the black wall congealed, of cave entrance was a pure white holy world, the blood stain when with human birth was entirely different. 很多民科或科学院之科普书籍里都会提到濒死体验,说人类在死亡来临的那一瞬间会以最快的速度回顾一下过去,感受一下现在,展望一下,对不起,这里没有将来,只有黑色的墙壁凝成的高速后退的洞,洞口的那头是一片纯白的圣洁世界,和人类出生时的血污截然不同。 Xu Le always does not believe that this view, this has not completed in the semiliterate brain of federal legal education to flood the world outlook of the mechanism and machinery, in his opinion, outside human and mine tunnel the stray cat of leftovers beef, simply does not have too many differences essentially besides the aesthetic standard, why before can have the death , the privilege of stress life? What can being on the verge of death experience of that stray cat be? Innumerable only corpulent mice? 许乐从来都不相信这种说法,这个没有完成联邦法定教育的半文盲脑子里充斥着机械原理和机械的世界观,在他看来,人类和矿坑外面吃剩牛肉的野猫,除了审美观之外根本没有太多本质上的差别,凭什么能够拥有死亡前重读人生的特权？那野猫的濒死体验会是什么？无数只肥头大耳的老鼠？ Even if the uncle teaches his ten attitude, the scalding hot mysterious shivering strength only corpulent mouse goes through in the body likely innumerably, he is still maintaining the absolute naive materialist view, he sadly and recognized rigid, the top of the head does not have the heaven, only then sky and starry sky. 哪怕大叔教会他那十个姿式,灼热的神奇颤抖力量像无数只肥头大耳的老鼠般在身体里穿行,他依然保持着绝对的朴素唯物主义观,他悲伤且又执着地认定,头顶没有天堂,只有天空和星空。 The heaven can only look in the life. 天堂只能在生活里去找。 Really does not have the black hole and holy white light, however has the black dream, does not have the black dream of new idea very much, but the charter computer old thing has not appeared in the dream, puts on an old age steward to overpower or really puts on the black silk short skirt to tell some most profound things, in the black dream only then halo tearing of pain, the powder of aura leaves, not rebirth, is gradually quiet. 果然没有黑洞和圣洁的白光,然而却有黑梦,很没有新意的黑梦,只不过宪章电脑老东西并没有出现在梦中,穿一身老年管家制服或真的穿上黑丝短裙讲述一些玄之又玄的东西,黑梦里只有痛苦的光晕撕裂,气息的散离,绝不重生,逐渐沉寂。 The suicide is a very simple matter, living actually is also a very simple matter, particularly has experienced the innumerable life and death tests regarding one, the body muscle and organ polished incomparable powerful young people, matter that he needs to handle, but opens the eyes diligently. 自杀是很简单的一件事情,活下来其实也是很简单的一件事情,尤其是对于一个经历过无数次生死考验,身体肌肉和器官被打磨的无比强悍的年轻人来说,他所需要做的事情,只是努力地睁开双眼。 Xu Le opened the eyes difficultly, the ray in view slit gradually dim clear, on the wall has in a style the majestic oil painting, following bamboo slip illegible to making one has nothing recognizes impulsive. 许乐困难地睁开了双眼,眼帘缝隙中的光芒逐渐黯淡清晰,墙上有一幅风格中正堂皇的油画,下面的签面潦草到令人没有任何冲动去辩认。 „Awoke!” “醒了！” With this shout, in the hospital ward resounds the stormy noisy chaotic sound of footsteps surprisedly, the intense treatment agrees the sound, all kinds of advanced medical equipment were linked his body. 随着这声惊讶地喊声,病房里响起密集嘈乱的脚步声,紧张的治疗合议声,各式各样先进的医疗设备被连到了他的身上。 The metal contact piece pastes on the naked flesh should be very icy cold, had had not happy passing Xu Le in the federal army General Hospital, wants to say in the heart silently, then in the body subconsciousness prepares to shiver. 金属触片贴在赤裸的肌肤上应该十分冰凉,在联邦陆军总医院里曾经有过非常不愉快过往的许乐,在心中默默想道,然后身体下意识里准备颤抖。 However he is unable to shiver...... he even not to feel that an icy coldness, by this time, he discovered own body by the control of brain, does not have any feeling was not transmitted completely. 然而他无法颤抖……他甚至没有感觉到一丝冰凉,到此时,他才发现自己的身体完全不受大脑的控制,没有任何感觉传来。 He knits the brows. 他皱了皱眉。 Fortunately, the brow can also move, then the eye should also be able to narrow the eyes, lies down the Xu Le lip on hospital bed twists the mouth sidewise, smiles happily. 还好,眉头还可以动,那么眼睛应该也能眯起来,躺在病床上的许乐嘴唇咧开,开心地笑了笑。 This that returns from the god of death place wipes the smile, the empire person who in hospital ward shocks instantaneously is collectively speechless. 从死神处归来的这抹笑容,瞬间震撼的病房内的帝国人集体无语。 Several days later. 数日之后。 „I have warned you, your is really mad is scattered by me, the meridians that on circulates have blocked, if tries to break through forcefully, only has the dead end.” “我警告过你,你的真气已经被我打散,上循环的经脉已经塞住,如果试图强行突破,那只有死路一条。” Huai Caoshi shoulders both hands to stand in the bedside, looks at Xu Le on bed, looks at that thin cheeks, said unemotionally: „I have not really thought, you regarded the method of suicide this unexpectedly.” 怀草诗背负双手站在床边,看着床上的许乐,看着那张消瘦至极的脸颊,面无表情说道:“我是真没有想到,你居然把这当成了自杀的手段。” Xu Le smiles, has not said anything. 许乐笑了笑,没有说什么。 Present he already whole body paralysis, only then above the neck can move, besides the speech, he can only express own idea with the expression, cannot study President Pabou such to make an effort to brandish the ascension of right arm help mood. 如今的他已经全身瘫痪,只有颈部以上能够动,除了说话外,他只能用表情来表达自己的想法,再也不能学着帕布尔总统那样用力地挥舞右臂帮助情绪的升腾。 The expression of human can only choose to smile and cry, the joyful and sad, joyful and depressed, tranquil or dry strongly fragrant these two opposite camps, therefore Xu Le natural selection former. 人类的表情只能选择笑与哭、喜悦与悲伤、快乐和沮丧、平静或燥郁这两个相反的阵营,于是许乐自然选择前者。 „According to the doctor and my judgment, your whole life could not stand again.” Huai Caoshi looks at him to say indifferently: „Feeling of whole body paralysis how? Cannot carry the repair arm to demonstrate that again own talent, is some regrets?” “根据医生和我的判断,你这辈子都再也站不起来了。”怀草诗望着他淡然说道:“全身瘫痪的感觉怎么样？不能再扛着修理臂展示自己的天赋,是不是有些后悔？” „How do I feel like your highness your regrettable more than me?” “我怎么觉得好像是殿下你的遗憾比我更多一些？” Cheeks thin Xu Le starts talking finally, sound hoarse weak, said: „Feeling of paralysis, un, is somewhat fresh.” 脸颊消瘦的许乐终于开口说话,声音嘶哑虚弱至极,说道:“瘫痪的感觉,嗯,有些新鲜。” „Cannot judge that from the file you are an incurable optimist.” Huai Caoshi turns around, made one cup of coffee to oneself, said at will. “从档案中并不能判断出你是一个无可救药的乐观主义者。”怀草诗转过身去,给自己冲了一杯咖啡,随意说道。 „That is because I have not fallen into the incurable despair, therefore is unable to show the talent in this aspect.” “那是因为我从来没有陷入过无可救药的绝望之中,所以无法展现这方面的天赋。” Huai Caoshi carries the coffee cup to turn around, after silent moment, suddenly opens the mouth to ask: „If on the same day died, at this moment paralyzed, can you really be resigned?” 怀草诗端着咖啡杯转过身来,沉默片刻后忽然开口问道:“当日若死了,此刻瘫痪了,你真能甘心？” Heard these words silent, Xu Le long time, is staring at the snow white ceiling, until the lip angle exuded a complex inexplicable happy expression, hoarse replied in a low voice: „Naturally is unwilling, some of my a lot have not been done, many secrets do not know.” 听到这句话,许乐沉默了很长时间,直直地盯着雪白的天花板,直至唇角泛起一丝复杂莫名的笑意,才低声嘶哑回答道:“当然不甘心,我还有很多事情没有做,还有很多秘密不知道。” „For example?” Huai Caoshi drank coffee. “比如？”怀草诗喝了一口咖啡。 „You have read my file, should know Zhang Xiaomeng this person.” “你看过我的档案,应该知道张小萌这个人。” „Your first love.” “你的初恋。” „Good.” The eye of Xu Le narrowed the eyes, the feeling said in a soft voice: „Before I always thought dead a time, must make love with her before again, now it seems like does not have the opportunity, this probably was biggest being unwilling.” “不错。”许乐的眼睛眯了起来,轻声感慨说道:“我以前总想着死之前一定要和她再做一次爱,现在看来没机会了,这大概就是最大的不甘。” Hears this unexpected reply, Huai Caoshi changes countenance rarely, asked: „Why isn't your national young girl Jian Shui'er? Naturally, in my opinion, in your warm dark unclear federal idiot women, is worth associating on husk that female engineer.” 听到这个出乎意料的回答,怀草诗难得动容起来,问道:“为什么不是你们的国民少女简水儿？当然,在我看来,你那些暖昧不清的联邦蠢货女人中,也就果壳那位女工程师值得交往一下。” Does not wait for Xu Le to reply, the empire princess who this has not been in love thinks oneself understood anything, shakes the head saying: „Stupid first love complex.” 不等许乐回答,这位从来没有谈过恋爱的帝国公主殿下以为自己明白了什么,摇头说道:“愚蠢的初恋情结。” Xu Le smiles, without explanation, in entire universe probably also only then Tai Family that crown prince master knows this first-grade greatly unwilling real reason. 许乐笑了笑,没有解释,整个宇宙中大概也只有邰家那位太子爷才知道这种第一等大不甘的真实原因。 „Since greatly unwilling, why can commit suicide? Since is the incurable optimist, I always think that you will insist on finally, at least to insist on the execution grounds.” “既然有大不甘,为什么要自杀？既然是无可救药的乐观主义者,我总以为你会坚持到最后,至少要坚持到刑场上。” „Federal proverb said, the god of death lets your three o'clock reports, you could not notice that again first wipes the sunlight. But I am a soldier, even is facing the god of death, must dispute with him works hard.” “联邦谚语说,死神让你三点钟报道,你就再也看不到第一抹阳光。但我是一名军人,即便面对着死神,都要和他较量一下力气。” After Xu Le silent moment, replied: „You want to let on me the execution grounds, making many people visit me dead, I do not know the specific reason, but you need anything, I must make you unable to obtain anything, at least the method of death, time of dying, I can choose freely.” 许乐沉默片刻后回答道:“你们想让我上刑场,让很多人看着我死,我不知道具体的原因,但你们需要什么,我就要让你们得不到什么,至少死的方法,死的时间,我可以自由选择。” „Until the death at that moment, the soldiers should fight.” “直到死亡那一刻,军人都应该战斗。” „Suicide, actually is also a fight.” “自杀,其实也是一种战斗。”