SH :: Volume #3

#252: Cracking a joke, we are the straight male!


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您可以在百度里搜索“饲养全人类妙笔阁(imiaobige.com)”查找最新章节! Yumia empire 61 years. 尤米亚帝国六十一年。 Yumia elf Great Emperor, opened up the new domain again, makes Space Ring, this is uses the breeding elf in the life fruit space, precious magic secret Ju who manufactures. 尤米亚精灵大帝,再次开辟了新领域,制造空间戒指,这是利用孕育精灵的生命果实内空间,进行制造的珍贵魔法秘具。 Irfan hears the news to sit with Gilna in the woods, leading two children to eat to bake, her innate talent is very strong, for also Yumia this reputation goes all out to maintain diligently, and beforehand life old tree does not trust me, now trusts her completely, gives her to study the life fruit unexpectedly.” 伊尔凡听到消息正在和吉尔娜坐在树林中,带着两个孩子吃烧烤,“她的天赋很强,也为了‘尤米亚’这个名声拼命维持努力,并且之前的生命古树不信任我,现在完全的信任她,竟然把生灵果实交给她研究。” Yumia empire 67 years. 尤米亚帝国六十七年。 In Mil Segou woods, discovered that Irfan's trail, Yumia Great Emperor goes personally, the entire land moved to the draw, Irfan severe wound escapes. 米尔塞古树林中,发现伊尔凡的足迹,尤米亚大帝亲自前往,整个大地被移平,伊尔凡重伤而逃。 Yumia empire 71 years. 尤米亚帝国七十一年。 Ordinary child named Arthur, devil child named Ruhr, grows up gradually, two people even in the journey, meet with the elf female who oneself liked, marries them together. 普通孩子名为“亚瑟”,恶魔孩子名为“鲁尔”,渐渐长大成人,两人甚至在旅途中,邂逅了自己喜欢的精灵女子,与她们一同结婚。 Also passes several years. 又过数年。 Arthur gives birth to three children, two male and one female. 亚瑟生下三个孩子,两男一女。 Ruhr gives birth to a devil boy. 鲁尔生下一个恶魔男孩。 The ethnic group even more expanded, issued a warrant for arrest the possibility that found to be even more huge, after he hesitate several times decided, separates the ethnic group, making the own two children go out independently, leading the own family to go out to live. 族群越发扩大了,被通缉找到的可能性越发巨大,他几次犹豫后决定,分开族群,让自己的两个孩子独立出去,带着自己的家庭出去生活。 After all already grew up, cooking technique already gives you two, you can travel directly, handle the matter that oneself want to handle.” “毕竟已经长大成人了,烹饪的手法已经交给你们两个,你们可以直接去旅行,做自己想要做的事情。” Yumia empire 94 years. 尤米亚帝国九十四年。 For several years passes, the elves discover besides them gradually, this stretch of land presents two human form Intelligent Race, can abandon breeding of elf old tree unexpectedly, the independent multiplication, as well as they have the unique masculine life! 数年过去,精灵们渐渐发现除了她们以外,这片大地出现两个人形智慧种族,竟然能抛开精灵古树的孕育,独立繁衍,以及他们有独特男性的生命! We must obey the rule of ancestor, from prefers, falls in love to be able sincerely in the same place.” They warned the own descendant. “我们要遵守先祖的规则,自相情愿,真心相爱才能在一起。”他们告诫自己的后代。 You said, we can also have a child? Can make us try?” “你说,我们自己也能生孩子?可以让我们试一试?” Even some beautiful elves are very curious, can oneself also seem like the life old tree general breeding life unexpectedly? Has the elf to start with them to fall in love, lives together gradually, gave birth to many descendants. 甚至有些美丽精灵十分好奇,自己竟然也能像是生命古树一般孕育生命?有精灵开始与他们相爱,渐渐生活在一起,生下了不少后代。 On elf King's Hall. 精灵王殿上。 These, are the descendants of criminal!” “那些,都是罪人的后代!” Yumia elf Great Emperor starts to establish the prison, oneself become chief prison warden personally, any and these criminals in the together elf, multiply the descendant for them, will shut in the prison! They are the rebels of elf clan, lost the divine nature, was doped by the desire .... These two evil races, must apprehend to issue a warrant for arrest completely!” 尤米亚精灵大帝开始成立监狱,自己亲自成为典狱长,“任何与这些罪人在一起的精灵,为他们繁衍后代,都会被关进监狱!她们是精灵族的叛徒,失去了神性,被欲念掺杂....这两个罪恶种族,必须要全部捉拿通缉!” After the elf empire experienced the short hundred years of peace, welcomed the war and turmoil again, even compares the beforehand elf tribe reunification war, more terrifying turmoil! 精灵帝国经历了短暂的百年和平后,再次迎来了战争与动乱,甚至比之前的精灵部落统一战争,更加恐怖的动乱! The tree prison establishes. 树界监狱成立。 After a unified elf clan, more than 400 war old trees, have rested and built up strength, at present by 300 war old trees, surrounds the trees wall the square shape prison, has not let the person from inside to escape! 统一精灵一族后,四百多颗战争古树,一直休养生息,眼前由三百颗战争古树,围拢成树木墙壁的方形监狱,没有让人能从里面逃脱! We have our races, has our dignity! Human Race freedom! Dares to the god resistance of creation elf!” “我们有我们的种族,有我们的尊严!人族自由!敢于向创造精灵的神抗争!” Human Race big Mage Arthur, leading Human Race to start the multiplication resistance! 人族法师亚瑟,带领人族开始繁衍反抗! But a devil clan, although can the multiplication, but the multiplication ability and elf are equally low, now only then dozens clansmen, Ruhr choice gave up the war, the excavation cavern, hides in into the bottom deep place. 而恶魔一族,虽然能自我繁衍,但繁衍能力与精灵一样低下,现在只有数十名族人,鲁尔选择放弃了战争,挖掘洞穴,躲入地底深处。 For several years passes. 数年过去。 Various lots of male sinful subjects, were caught into. 大量大量的各种男性罪民,被捕捉入内。 If the beforehand elf war, the major life old trees are internal fights, naturally does not care, is at present, already involved the life threat, likely overthrows their rules, must eliminate all male, the world is the elf. 如果是之前的精灵战争,各大生命古树算是内斗,也自然不太在意,可是眼前,已经涉及了生命威胁,很可能推翻它们的统治,必须消灭一切男性,世界属于精灵。 ...... ...... Spore Evolution Sandbox. 孢子进化沙盘 In the trim emerald green miniature mountains rivers, various species are evolving crazily. 整片翠绿的微型山川河流上,各种物种正在疯狂演化。 Now everyone is working hard for the prosperity of the country, the evolution species, strives to catch this wave of the world train silently, is only the style is somewhat strange, animal already became extremely scarce, many people are evolving the plant earnestly. 现在人人都在奋发图强,默默进化物种,争取搭上这一波的世界列车,只是画风有些奇怪,动物已经变得极其稀少了,许多人都在埋头演化植物。 Entire Sandbox almost does not have the beast, one pile of plants multiply, atmosphere already is extremely strange. 整个沙盘几乎没有走兽,一堆植物繁衍,气氛已经极其诡异。 Everyone is having a tacit understanding, the own one by one plant species overthrew, evolves, goes all out. 大家都在心照不宣,自己的一个个植物物种推翻了,又重新演化,非常拼命。 Has newbie player unable to bear raise the question, immediately causes the huge reaction. 萌新玩家忍不住提出疑问,立刻就引起了巨大的反响。 What? You said that I listened to the Moe Younger Sister words, to enter the ancient wooden world obtains the powerful strength immediately, starts to evolve the plant? Is impossible! Person who I am not that type do not have the principle! Can the women's wear grow stronger? Does not exist!” “什么?你说我是听了萌妹的话,为进入古木世界立刻获得强大的力量,才开始进化成植物的?不可能!我不是那种没有原则的人!女装就能变强?不存在的!” Ha! Really laughable! I am the steel male! Small young... I have the wife ! I over 30 years old am, the sons went to school, how turns into the woman son to see me? Before I am only, in the evolved plant, does not know how long evolved, can't give up?” “哈哈哈!真是可笑!我是钢铁直男好吗!小年轻...我有老婆哒!我都三十多岁了,儿子都上学了,变成女人儿子怎么看我?我只是之前一直就在演化植物,都不知道演化多久了,总不能放弃吧?” Innumerable big shot indicated, oneself will not be confused by the strength absolutely, departs from the own principle. 无数大佬纷纷表示,自己绝对不会被力量迷惑,丧失自己的原则。 Racer of Mount Haruna is turning into a plant, takes root on the land, takes the lead to talk wildly, warned surrounding small newbie: 秋名山车速正在变成一颗植物,扎根在土地上,带头放言,告诫周围的小萌新: Funny! My solemn old player, repairs laboriously 50-60 years, spends lifespan of average person often, can repair to turn fifth-order, how to possibly have the principle? Isn't delivers me the rank, to deliver me heaven defying innate talent? How possibly by major elf old tree that attractive wage benefits conditions, easily attraction? Becoming elf clan Hero that they employ? I am not such casual person!” “搞笑!我堂堂老玩家,辛苦重修个50-60年,花费一个普通人的寿命时常,也能重修变成五阶,怎么可能会那么没有原则?不就是送我等级、送我逆天天赋?怎么可能会被各大精灵古树那种诱人的薪水福利条件,轻易吸引?成为它们雇用的精灵族英雄?我不是那样随便的人!” The people said that oneself solemn excellent son! Possibly how to undergo the seduction? 众人都表示,自己堂堂大好男儿!怎么可能会经受不住诱惑? This group of shameless ones!” “这群无耻之徒!” Xu Zhi was shocked, felt after these goods boiled bare the hair, becoming intelligently was more dreadful , the face thick-skinned like the city wall, the average person could not achieve likely these stupid ass shameless that! 许纸惊呆了,觉得这些货色熬秃了头发之后,变得更加聪明猥琐了,并且,脸皮厚如城墙,一般人做不到像这些沙雕那么的无耻! Xu Zhi has not thought, on the star of that old tree world makes that crazily. 许纸没有想到,那一颗古树世界的星球上闹得那么疯狂。 Then just developed, Civilization went on a journey the cultivation system embryonic form, is separated from the barbaric tribe to enter city-state age, explodes that terrifying situation. 这才刚刚发展起来,文明出行了修行体系雏形,脱离野蛮部落进入城邦时代,就暴发那么恐怖的事态。 Xu Zhi imagined a picture: 许纸想象了一下画面: When the time comes, under the elf old tree, one pile of attractive beautiful woman elves come out to dig out the foot, is digging the nostril, all day shouts is wanting heaven defying? 到时候,精灵古树下,一堆漂亮美人精灵出来抠着脚,挖着鼻孔,整天嚷嚷着要逆天 Believes Di Qi also very stupified. 相信帝祁也很懵逼 Hehe, if Di Qi this Sun provoking anger, were careful that he gave the day you entirely.” Xu Zhi cheerful smiles, thought that they cannot be popular the big spray in the hand of Di Qi. “呵呵,如果把帝祁这个太阳给惹怒了,小心他把你们统统给日了。”许纸乐呵呵的笑起来,觉得他们在帝祁的手上兴不起多大浪花。 Suddenly player came out to notify, explosive news! Outside wood, already posted, already turned into the man to get married!” 忽然一个玩家出来报信了,“劲爆新闻!外面的木木,已经发帖了,已经变成男人结婚了!” fuck!” 卧槽!” The people stare the big eye immediately, immediately was shocked. 众人顿时瞪大眼睛,顿时惊呆了。 Wood show air/Qi! They have not entered the sea of bitterness, wooden already gets out of misery, enjoyed the life achievement!? 木木还是骚气啊!他们还没有进入苦海,木木已经脱离苦海,享受人生成果了!? They gave up the evolution species in abundance, plans to go to look at one, at this time, a outside forum also excitement. 他们纷纷放弃了进化物种,打算出去瞄一眼,这个时候,外面的论坛也一片激动。 Screenshot, 截图、 Screenshot, 截图、 Screenshot, 截图、 The one after another nuptial dress distributes as before, countless people envy. 一张张婚纱照发出来,无数人羡慕得不行。 „Did this bring her home? Hateful!” “这就抱得美人归了?可恶!” I am understand why I did not have the girlfriend, because I have not worn the women's wear, integrated them to become the friend, then seized the chance to gain their hearts! I thought that own already found took off/escaped the single means!( Happy)” “我算是明白我为什么没有女朋友了,因为我没有穿上女装,融入她们成为朋友,然后趁机获取她们的芳心!我觉得自己已经找到了脱单办法!(开心)” „, Must have the girlfriend so that's how it is, can first turn into the woman?( Is lost in thought .jpg)” “原来如此吗,要拥有女朋友,得先变成女人?(陷入沉思.jpg)” Feared that feared after I turn into the woman, wants to start to look for the boyfriend( funny)” “怕就怕在我变成女人之后,就想开始找男朋友了(滑稽)” One crowd of livestock are driving, but the one after another wedding photo transmits as before, makes people jealous. 一群牲口在开车,但一张张婚纱照依旧传来,羡煞旁人。 An only beautiful water elf beautiful woman with a big delicate and pretty masculine elf, takes a group souvenir photo in various places, the swayed makes the wedding photo, even he also changes devil true body that becomes the whole body flame, with hugging the elf beautiful woman is kissing. 一个唯美的水精灵美人与一个高大俊美的男性精灵,在各处合影留念,摆拍婚纱照,甚至他还变身成浑身火焰的恶魔真身,和抱着精灵美人接吻。 Day! The west imaginary wedding photo, was fed a dog grain unexpectedly!” “日!西幻婚纱照,竟然被喂了一口狗粮!” Countless person with bitter hatred, but the wood also endured the hard times, spent for more than 100 years, finally from the pain compared with sisters' status, transformed for the lover. 无数人痛心疾首,不过木木也算是熬过了苦日子,花费了一百多年,终于从苦比姐妹的身份,转化为了恋人。 But gradually, some people detected that was not right. 可是渐渐,有人察觉到了不对。 Holds the wedding not in the elf royal palace, but in remote mountains and ancient forests? 举办婚礼不在精灵王宫,而是在深山老林? The wood sent the picture, very earnest start explanation present situation, oneself turned into the man, by the elf old tree to the pit a wave, now is actually lost all glory, already wandered all over the world, the people were shocked instantaneously! 木木发完了图片,很认真的开始讲解现在的形势,自己变成了男人,却被精灵古树给坑了一波,现在失去了所有荣耀,已经浪迹天涯,众人瞬间都惊呆了! Your boy smokes the person with the athlete's foot all day, asked that others own foot skin does not get a grip, the flavor, is not one's turn you greatly now finally! 你小子整天用脚气熏人,问人家自己的脚皮得劲不,味道大不,现在终于轮到你了! Being caught in one's own trap. 作茧自缚。 Everyone feels wonderful, cheerful smiles, your lowly person also has today. 大家都觉得妙,乐呵呵的笑起来,你这个小贱人也有今天。 Wooden did not speak , to continue to emit the screenshot. 木木不说话,继续放出截图。 Various types of traveling good food pictures, change into a scenery party, two children's pictures. 各种旅游美食图片,化为一个风景党,还有自己两个孩子的照片。 „Do you special escape or travel? Your these two children, seems like human, seems like the devil, you simply are livestock! Gives you a woman, can you create two races?” “你特么逃亡还是旅游?你的这两个孩子,一个像是人类,一个像是恶魔,你简直是个牲口!给你一个女人,你能创造两个种族?” I sour( citral .jpg)” “我酸了(柠檬精.jpg)” Everyone did not feel at the scene to the taste. 大家当场就觉得不对味了。 Also had the law of the land? You should not become by the object of athlete's foot crazy steamroll chase, was suppressed? 还有没有王法了?你不应该成为被脚气疯狂碾压追逐的对象,然后被镇压起来吗? Wooden did not speak: Ha! I give everyone to explain, my descendants multiply unceasingly, already was badly battered, I do not have the ambition, my two son ambitions are very actually big, wants to have the own race to rise.” 木木不说话:“哈哈哈!我给大家解释一下吧,我的子孙不断繁衍,已经焦头烂额了,我没有野心,我的两个儿子倒是野心挺大的,想带着自己的种族崛起。” Everyone is silent, the tooth is sore, gives you a woman, you create two races, then with two race and elf clan wars, can solve the security crisis, do oneself withdraw? 大家沉默,牙齿酸痛,给你一个女人,你就创造两个种族,然后用两个种族和精灵族大战,就能解决安全危机,自己脱身而出? Wooden did not speak: „ Opposite party already could not catch us, and her athlete's foot spicy eye, but could not suffocate me, I restrained her inborn! 木木不说话:“对方已经抓不到我们夫妻二人了,并且她的脚气辣眼睛,但熏不死我,我天生克制她! I wooden did not speak, here swore! Even if on my road kicks the stone to plunge to death, was beaten savagely dead by my old husband's family's home, my floral formula cause of death, will be impossible to be given to hold by Yumia, imprisons! ” 我木木不说话,在这里立誓!就算是我路上踢到石头摔死,被我老婆家暴打死,我花式死法,都不可能会被尤米亚给抓住,囚禁起来!” On the contrary is you, as soon as you go, do not blame me not to remind you, to do the matter, most likely, will be suffocated you by Yumia while still alive, “反倒是你们,你们一进去,就别怪我不提醒你们,如果想搞事情,十有八九,会被尤米亚把你们活活熏死, Hahahaha! Everyone, experiences by the elf beautiful young girl, with fear that the athlete's foot suffocates while still alive! Said goodbye below! I continue to travel around the world with my wife, enjoyed various types of good food! ” 哈哈哈哈!各位,体验一下被精灵美少女,用脚气活活熏死的恐惧吧!在下告辞!我去继续和我的老婆周游世界,享受各种美食去了!” Are you tease us to play?! The people thought instantaneously the skull pain, the sentimental litigant too had not been affected greatly, already achieved wishes to turn into the man, instead left behind one pile of mess to them? 你是逗我们玩吧?!众人瞬间觉得脑壳痛了,感情当事人没有受到太大影响,已经如愿以偿变成了男人,反而留下了一堆烂摊子给他们? But wooden already took the road certainly, their already had no way out, wants to be is impossible with the same way flickering life old tree, they were inevitably vigilant, later can only turn into the female elf? 而木木已经把路走绝了,他们已经无路可走,想用同样的方式忽悠生命古树是不可能了,它们必然警惕,以后只能变成女精灵了? Especially Racer of Mount Haruna, already was wild with rage, must store to run around in circles in front of the computer anxiously, he wants to turn into the man with this flickering method, without thinking of wooden this cheap person first step, your athlete's foot, terribly peppery eye, even if changes into the both legs of true elf beautiful young girl thoroughly, who can bear this! 特别是秋名山车速,已经气疯了,在电脑前急得屯团团转,他就是想用这个忽悠方法变成男人,没有想到木木这个贱人抢先一步,还有你那脚气,贼辣眼睛,就算是彻底化为真正精灵美少女的双腿,可谁受得了这个啊! Yumia no one can be solved! 尤米亚没有人能解决! He wanted to follow the mesh wire to kill him instantaneously in the past! 他瞬间想要顺着网线过去打死他! Finally, he is the deep breath one breath, returned to normal the resentment, returns to the table, reorganizes the dense and numerous books materials, the careful research, looks like, to solve Yumia .... I must evolve the species that eats spicily can grow stronger!” 最终,他还是深呼吸一口气,平复了怨气,回到桌子上,重新整理密密麻麻的书籍资料,仔细研究,“看来,为了解决尤米亚....我得进化一个吃辣就能变强的物种了!”
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