time is 1 : 30 am, the street light illuminates broad elevated road, Wang Zijin drives red small BMW, the travel slightly lonely elevated road, the vision is looking straight ahead the front, the focal distance in pupil is dispersing from time to time, from time to time contracts. 时间是凌晨 1 点半,路灯照亮宽阔的高架路,王子衿驾驶着红色小宝马,行驶在略显冷清的高架路,目光直视着前方,瞳孔里的焦距时而散开,时而收缩。 She seems worried, is actually deducing the later war in the brain, is the domineering of this performance, is gentle elucidation, the answer is the latter, Yīngyīng Monster is like her younger brother, belongs to be impervious to threat or hard sell softly. 她显得心事重重,其实是在脑子里推演着待会儿的战局,是该表现的强势,还是温柔的开解,答案是后者,嘤嘤怪和她弟弟一样,属于出软不吃硬。 But the matter on sentiment, too soft is not a good deed, this hard time you hardly. 可感情上的事,太软了并非好事,该硬的时候你还是得硬。 Therefore later random strain. 所以待会随机应变。 Wang Zijin felt oneself are the generals of hundred war undefeated, is going to the battlefield alone. 王子衿觉得自己是百战不败的将军,正独自奔赴战场。 In fact, from infancy to maturity, she is this winner in aspect. 事实上,从小到大,她一直是这方面的常胜将军。 The love to any woman is a battlefield, each women must have the guard love consciousness and were determined. 爱情对任何女人来说都是一个战场,每个女人都要有守卫爱情的觉悟和决心。 Went to elevated road, opened ten minutes to arrive at that small nest again, Wang Zijin when the shuttle traffic light, nearly bumped into with flank Volkswagen sedans, both sides responded luckily quickly, sharply checked. 下了高架路,再开十分钟就到那个小窝了,王子衿在穿梭红绿灯时,险些和侧方的一辆大众轿车相撞,幸好双方反应都快,急刹了。 The glass of populace car(riage) driving position falls, the driver pokes head is direct to head one scolded. 大众车驾驶位的玻璃降下来,司机探出头就是劈头盖脑的一顿骂。 Wang Zijin looks up, the discovery is a red light, she runs a red light unknowingly. 王子衿抬头看去,才发现已经是红灯了,她不知不觉中闯了红灯。 Patted the cheek, cheers up, does not pay attention to bì bì of driver, hits the steering wheel crazily, bypasses the populace car(riage), swaggers away. 拍了拍自己脸蛋,振作精神,不理会司机的哔哔,狂打方向盘,绕过大众车,扬长而去。 Drives to enter the community, she turns on the lamp of vehicle roof, lags behind the antidazzling device the mirror, ties ponytail a black long hair of oneself end reel, Wang Zijin usually does not tie ponytail, because Qin Ze said that bunch ponytail will appear her to be brazen, although is the joke nature, she actually listened at heart. 开车进入小区,她打开车顶的灯,拉下遮光板的镜子,把自己一头末梢带卷的黑色长发束成马尾,王子衿通常不束马尾,因为秦泽说束马尾会显得她脸大,虽然是玩笑性质,她却听进心里了。 But ponytail will make her increase a succinct and dry/does practice qi nature, thus seems like the domineering. 但马尾会让她增添一股简洁和干练气质,从而看起来强势。 Completes all these, Wang Zijin puts out foul air slowly, drives away all disadvantageous mood, burns out and pulls out the key and lock vehicle door, forms a coherent whole, she moves toward the building of residence with long hurried strides, the back looks like the female general who the one person alone went to the battlefield. 做完这一切,王子衿缓缓吐出一口浊气,驱赶出所有不利情绪,熄火、拔钥匙、锁车门,一气呵成,她大步流星走向居民楼,背影像极了孤身奔赴战场的女将军。 Opens that leaf of familiar door, in the living room the light is bright, Qin Baobao stands near the window, silent is looking into the whole city lights, if the Wang Zijin's back leads decidedly the general who is advancing to the battlefield, she is queen that loses, is lonely and desolate. 推开那扇熟悉的门,客厅里灯光亮堂,秦宝宝站在窗边,无声的眺望着满城灯火,如果王子衿的背影是带着决然迈向战场的将军,那她就是失落的女王,孤单又落寞。 Wang Zijin lives, visits her silently, Qin Baobao is looking at the night scene, she is looking at the Qin Baobao's back. 王子衿顿住,默默看着她,秦宝宝望着夜景,她望着秦宝宝的背影。 In the Wang Zijin mind, appears suddenly Qin Ze's that „Do Not Speak”, inside has lyrics to do for the occasion very much: Wants, with a black pencil, draws a silent living theater. 王子衿脑海里,突然就浮现秦泽的那首“不要说话”,里头有句歌词很应景:愿意,用一支黑色的铅笔,画一出沉默舞台剧。 In such atmosphere, she discovered suddenly, all lines that oneself prepare, seems not suitable to be used to make the prologue. 在这样的气氛中,她猛然间发现,自己准备的所有台词,似乎都不适合用来做开场白。 In this silent living theater, she feels somewhat depressing, and inexplicable sadness. 这场沉默的舞台剧中,她觉得有几分压抑,以及莫名的悲伤。 At this time, Qin Baobao turned round, faint smile: „You come.” 这时,秦宝宝回身,浅笑:“你来啦。” Her smiling face one such as in the past, Wang Zijin actually had/left deeply was hiding that mood. 她的笑容一如往昔,王子衿却品出了深藏着的那股情绪。 Probably has a needle, gently gripped at heart in Wang Zijin, her silent nod. 像是有根针,轻轻的在王子衿心里扎了一下,她无声点头。 Qin Baobao arrives at the sofa, sits down, the vision looks in all directions, said in a soft voice: „Feels here good, is not big, but is warm, between I and him am away from a wall, in the evening the belly was hungry, shouted that he can hear. In that time that he just moved, I cannot fall asleep frequently, midnight wants to watch the movie, no one accompanies, shouted one, shouted one enough, did not prefer running over that he will also jolt. But why the house gets bigger and bigger, is getting more and more rich, I and his distance, actually starts slowly was far. I have thought for a long time, wants to understand, that time I and he such as this house, was not then big, but purely and simple. Among us does not have so many things, money, fame and company, and you.” 秦宝宝走到沙发边,坐下,目光四顾,轻声道:“还是觉得这里好,不大,但温馨,我和他之间就隔着一堵墙,晚上肚子饿了,喊一声他就能听见。他刚搬进来的那段时间里,我经常睡不着,半夜想看电影,没人陪,就喊一声,喊一声就够了,再不情愿他也会屁颠颠的跑过来。可为什么房子越住越大,越来越有钱,我和他的距离,却开始慢慢的远了。我想了很久,想明白了,那时候的我和他便如这个房子,不大,但纯粹和简单。我们之间没有那么多的东西,钱、名气、公司、以及你。” „Now seems like, thought here is very small?” Her vision has swept the living room: „But our three finished eating the food every night, the nest in this living room, you will watch the movie, he makes number model, looks at the stock, I always like making with him, from infancy to maturity whoopees happily he. No reason, thought that this is very good.” “现在看起来,是不是觉得这里很小？”她目光扫过客厅:“可我们三个每晚吃完饭,就会窝在这个客厅里,你看电影,他做数模,看股票,我总喜欢和他闹,从小到大就喜欢闹他。没什么原因,就是觉得这样很好。” „Initially you ran Shanghai, I think you live in time, a blink, one -and-a-half years. Actually I was very afterward bothersome your, such bold in others family/home really good, you hurry, you walked here are I and his domain. But remembered you saying that in the family/home compelled the person who you married do not like, I was also tenderhearted, I was good” Qin Baobao not to be justified to you so suddenly, am staring at her: „When starts.” “当初你跑来沪市,我原本以为你只是住一段时间,一眨眼,一年半了。其实后来我挺烦你的,这么没脸没皮的赖在别人家里真的好么,你赶紧走啊,你走了这里又是我和他的地盘了。可是想起你说家里逼你嫁给不喜欢的人,我又心软了,我对你这么好”秦宝宝突然说不下去,凝视着她:“什么时候开始的。” Wang Zijin opens mouth, replied truthfully: „At the end of last year.” 王子衿张了张嘴,如实回答:“去年年底。” „At the end of last year” Qin Baobao is muttering, smiles mournfully: „Nearly one year, is hiding the truth from my one year, originally I seemed like the fool to hide the truth from one year by you equally.” “去年年底”秦宝宝喃喃着,凄然一笑:“快一年了啊,瞒着我一年了,原来我像是傻子一样被你们瞒了一年。” „Baobao (darling),” Wang Zijin calms down, said: „At the end of last year, was I to his confess, I loved him, liked loving very much very much, I have never thought must rob your what/anything, but the sentiment was this, marvelous, happy and selfish, just when with he contacted, I did not think where he had attracts me, he in me, was bosom friend younger brother, possibly was very interesting, because in the high school in three years, on my classmate mouth is always hanging her younger brother, on the mouth said that younger brother how was not how good, mentioned his time, the corner of the eye brow tip actually throughout is gentle. I think, this younger brother is very definitely interesting, is very different. After seeing him , meeting to might as well be well-known. Even he shows from the beginning to my expectation, making me feel a little bothersome, the heart said that if this younger brother and other man such is a quack remedy, after I found the work, moves.” “宝宝,”王子衿定了定神,说道:“去年年底,是我向他表白的,我爱他,很爱很爱,我从未想过要抢走你什么,但感情就是这样,奇妙、美好、自私,刚和他接触时,我并不觉得他有什么地方吸引我,他在我心里,是一个闺蜜的弟弟,可能很有趣,因为在高中三年里,我的同桌嘴上始终挂着她的弟弟,嘴上说弟弟怎么怎么不好,说起他的时候,眼角眉梢却始终是温柔的。我就想,这个弟弟肯定很有趣,很不一样。见到他之后,呵,见面不如闻名。甚至他一开始展现出对我的憧憬,让我觉得有点烦,心说如果这个弟弟和其他男人那样是个狗皮膏药,那我找到工作后就搬出去。” Said you possibly not to believe that was your younger brother first pursues my. 说出来你可能不信,是你弟弟先追求我的。 „Contacted time to grow, I discovered that he was truly different, had the talent obviously very much, actually instigated, in the world nothing can rare he, want to pursue me probably but actually, does not dare to act. Being together time is longer, he attracts me more and more, in always is so together happy with him, but you know that makes me produce at first „ is trying person who is his girlfriend” idea, not he, but is you ” “接触时间长了,我才发现他确实不一样,明明很有才华,却怂的很,好像世上没有什么能难得倒他,想追我,又不敢行动。相处的时间越长,他越来越吸引我,和他在一起总是那么开心,可你知道吗,最初让我产生“试着做他女朋友”想法的人,并不会他啊,而是你” Wang Zijin solemnly said: „You cannot hide the truth from me, we know so many years, we are strange bedfellows are so long, your intention has not hidden the truth from me.” 王子衿沉声道:“你瞒不住我的,我们认识这么多年,我们同床共枕那么久,你的心意从来没有瞒住我。” Qin Baobao visits her, after the moment, smiles bitterly and astringently: „You have not guessed wrong, I like him, no, I love him. In the world no one loves him compared with me.” 秦宝宝愣愣的看着她,片刻后,苦涩一笑:“你没猜错,我喜欢他,不,我爱他。世界上没有人比我更爱他。” These words, as if burnt/anxious Leizha in Wang Zijin ear bank. 这一句话,就仿佛焦雷炸在王子衿耳畔。 Unexpectedly, is really this. 竟然,真的是这样。 She has guessed correctly, but when Qin Baobao said these words personally, Wang Zijin's worldview subverted. 她早就猜到了,可当秦宝宝亲口说出这句话,王子衿的三观都颠覆了。 „Your you know that what you are saying?” The Wang Zijin shock said: „You are elder sister and younger brother, as elder sister's you, how can say this words.” “你你知道自己在说什么？”王子衿震惊道:“你们是姐弟啊,身为姐姐的你,怎么可以说出这种话。” „Strange, is very strange, perhaps you will also think that I am not concerned about face, falls in love with own younger brother unexpectedly. Saw that he discussed with other girl really happy, going wild that hated at heart. Thinks that he must be affectionate with other woman, even marriage and having child, collapses on the mentality wants to kill people. In the world does not have such elder sister.” Qin Baobao tender body swing back, the whole person pounds ruthlessly on the sofa, then as if pounded into the 20 year time river: “奇怪么,是挺奇怪的,或许你还会觉得我不要脸,竟然爱上自己的弟弟。看到他和别的女孩相谈甚欢,心里就恨的抓狂。想到他要和别的女人卿卿我我,甚至结婚生子,就心态崩的想杀人。世界上没有这样的姐姐。”秦宝宝娇躯后仰,整个人狠狠砸在沙发上,便仿佛砸入了二十年的时光长河里: „Very slightly very small time, I know that he is not my own younger brother. I and he listened secretly mother's telephone accidentally, does not know the child who that some families who was, I was bigger than him, therefore was also more sensible, I frightened him this matter do not disclose. Is regarded as a secret, like this we happy whole family.” “很小很小的时候,我就知道他不是我亲弟弟。我和他无意中偷听到了妈妈的电话,可不知道那个别人家的孩子是谁,我比他大,所以也更懂事,我吓唬他不要把这件事声张出去。就当做是一个秘密,这样我们还是开心开心的一家人。” „He is not intelligent, is very ordinary, long most worth looking, because just has my such outstanding elder sister, even more serves as contrast his mediocre not wonderfully, however younger brother has not therefore hated elder sister, instead cares to her, accepts own mediocre gradually, elder sister expects too much every so often, hopes that he can buoy up, makes a boy who has the temperament, in the future will become a man who will have the temperament. Therefore starts to bully him, snatches his thing, by the father punches in side hits a person when he is down.” “他不聪明,很平凡,长的最多耐看,正因为有我这么个优秀的姐姐,愈发衬托出他的平庸无奇,然而弟弟并没有因此妒恨姐姐,反而对她关怀备至,也渐渐接受自己的平庸,姐姐很多时候都恨铁不成钢,希望他能振作起来,做一个有脾气的男孩,将来成为一个有脾气的男人。于是开始欺负他,抢他东西,挨爸爸揍时在旁边落井下石。” „But he still to elder sister good pulls out the lung from the heart, when the most beloved toy gives elder sister, that type timid, the fawn same hope obtains the liking look, deep stabbing pain elder sister's heart. Childhood A'Ze was very timid, only knows that followed to play in me behind, the elementary school was snatched the pencil case that mother bought newly not to dare to speak, but must call my elder sister to look for the gathering place for him.” “可他仍然对姐姐好的掏心掏肺,把最心爱玩具送给姐姐时,那种怯怯的,小鹿一样渴望得到喜欢的眼神,深深刺痛着姐姐的心。小时候的阿泽是很怯弱的,只知道跟在我身后玩,小学被人抢了妈妈新买的铅笔盒也不敢吭声,还得叫我这个姐姐替他找场子。” „A year, my elementary school fifth grade, his third grade, little beansprout, we were on vacation from school on the road that year goes home, one group of boys bully me, they pull my hair, robbed my book bag, comes out inside book entirely but actually. Said that I am not the friend with them, asks me to trouble daily, but also some people raise only then cry, no one who my skirt I can do helps me, no one could count on, kid who counts on the third grade?” “有一年,那年我小学五年级,他三年级,小豆丁一个,我们放学回家的路上,有一伙男孩欺负我,他们扯我的头发,抢走了我的书包,把里面的书统统倒出来。说我不和他们做朋友,就天天找我麻烦,还有人掀我裙子我能做的只有哭,没人来帮助我,谁都指望不上,难道指望三年级的小屁孩？” „But you know that when I most am afraid, is a kid of such third grade, he stands before me, cried saying that do not bully my elder sister, then with their dead beating.” “但你知道么,在我最害怕的时候,就是这么一个三年级的小屁孩,他站在我面前,哭着说不要欺负我姐姐,然后和他们死打。” In the Qin Baobao mind appeared in the past picture, in the picture, the short small fellow time beat again throws down, actually clenching teeth stood, with the male student dead beatings of these high heads, was afraid obviously very much, obviously hit wants to call mother, but he is not willing to flinch, is bursting into tears to clench teeth to make a determined effort, was the dead beating. 秦宝宝脑海里浮现往昔的画面,画面里,矮矮的小个子再一次次拳打脚踢中摔倒,却咬着牙站起来,和那些比自己高一个脑袋的男生死打,明明很害怕了,明明被打的想叫妈妈了,可他不肯退缩,流着泪咬牙发狠,就是死打。 The girl cried to spend the attractive small cheek. 身后的女孩哭花了漂亮的小脸蛋。 Even if over the past several years, this picture still in the course of time more/complete new the storage in the Qin Baobao memory, that were one of the she and younger brother most precious recollections. 哪怕过去十几年,这个画面依然日久弥新的储存在秦宝宝记忆里,那是她和弟弟最珍贵的回忆之一。 „From that date, I started to change to his sentiment quietly, this was I have not detected. After that younger brother is good to elder sister's, in her no longer is the pure kinship, is impure, but is very happy. He always has about elder sister gentle and modestly declines, what/anything by me, what/anything is letting me, on the mouth often complained that the love of parents makes me foster big pile of bad problems, actually never engages in introspection, actually he is that most favors the elder sister's person.” “从那一天起,我对他的感情开始悄悄变化,这是我自己都没有察觉的。在那之后,弟弟对姐姐的好,在她心里不再是纯粹的亲情,不纯粹,但很甜蜜。他对姐姐始终心怀温柔和谦让,什么都由着我,什么都让着我,嘴上经常抱怨父母的宠爱让我养成一大堆坏毛病,却从不自省,其实他才是那个最宠姐姐的人。” „In recent years, elder sister relies on to him more and more, entangles crazily even feels this world, so long as had him enough, other did not matter. Several years ago his first contact girlfriend, in high spirits ran to show off with me, you know that at that time my what felt?” “这些年来,姐姐对他越来越依赖,最痴缠的时候甚至觉得这个世界只要有他就够了,其他的都无所谓。前几年他第一次交往女朋友,兴冲冲的跑回来跟我炫耀,你知道那时我什么感受？” „Pain, painful wants dead, like today's this.” Qin Baobao covers the chest, sobbed: „Painful does not want to live.” “痛,痛的想死,就像今天这样。”秦宝宝捂住心口,哽咽道:“痛的不想活了。” Wang Zijin is silent, matter arrived here, no matter all languages used, she listens to the recall past that the girl is talking endlessly, honest and affectionate revealing concern. 王子衿沉默着,事情到这里,所有的语言都不管用了,她听着女孩喋喋不休的回忆往事,坦诚又深情的吐露心事。 That was one was fermenting at heart more than ten years of sentiment, opened that flash of cover, smelled was actually not fragrant, but was the pain of tap web. 那是一份在心里发酵了十几年的感情,打开盖子的那一刹那,闻到的却不是芬芳,而是锥心的痛楚。 Any excuse and argument, in the face of this sentiment, suddenly pale and weak. 任何说辞和辩解,在这份感情面前,突然就苍白无力。 Meanwhile, Wang Zijin also understands why finally she will instigate, she is the other woman (third party) right, she inserts this should not in love, not only towering is unharmonious, unharmonious to even her felt every so often oneself are unnecessary. 同时,王子衿也终于明白她为什么会怂了,她是第三者没错,她插入这段不应该的爱情里面,既突兀又不和谐,不和谐到很多时候连她自己都觉得自己多余。 Therefore in the subconscious, she thought that she should instigate. 所以潜意识里,她觉得自己应该怂的。 „Zijin” “子衿” When does not know, this mindless woman, has always had tears streaming down the face. 不知何时,这个总是没心没肺的女人,已经泪流满面。 Qin Baobao uses an tone of nearly entreaty: „The 13 year, I loved his 13 year, that is my life. Asked you, gave back to me him, gave back to me” 秦宝宝用一种近乎哀求的语气:“十三年,我爱了他十三年,那是我的一生啊。求求你,把他还给我,还给我啊”