LOTGS :: Volume #10 雾州云梦

#816: The life is regretless

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The white circular buries in the black soil, seems the skull of Human Race, however! Skull small many of person. 白色圆形埋在黑色泥土里,仿佛是人类的头骨,然而又!人的头骨小的多。 His both hands are shivering the insertion soil, has dug it, the personal appearance stiffens immediately, a blood as if drop of boiling to the freezing point, that is a white stone. 他双手颤抖着插入泥土,将它挖了出来,身形顿时僵住,沸腾的血液仿佛一下降至冰点,那不过是一块白色石头而已。 „Small two, how, have not frightened me!” Big Brother Li puts on a long face saying that is also holding the hand of witch: „Can it be that my Younger Brother has come under a spell, you save him quickly.” “小二,你怎么了,别吓我啊！”李大哥哭丧着脸道,又拉着神婆的手:“我弟弟莫不是中邪了,你快救救他。” „Does lackey, what in my this vegetable plot have?” witch hints Big Brother Li to be not hurried first, then feels his head, gentle asking, familiar, is passing strangely. “二小子,我这菜地里有什么吗？”神婆先示意李大哥莫慌,然后摸着他的脑袋,慈祥的问道,熟悉之极,又透着陌生。 „I...... I do not know......” “我……我不知道……” He firmly holds that white stone, stands up dejected, the personal appearance has swayed, the exhausted feeling, the hungry feeling and pain feeling, have welled up instantly like surging tides, deeply is heavier, however he who is inferior to the disappointment in heart to come does not know that what to be disappointed? For several years, he like this does not come? What is also longing for? 他紧紧抓住那块白色石头,颓然站起身来,身形摇晃了一下,疲惫感、饥感、痛楚感,霎时如潮水般涌了上来,却都不及心中的失望来的更深更重,然而他不知道在失望些什么？十几年来,他不就是这样过来的吗？又在渴望着什么呢？ He goes out of the witch home, blocks from the eye with hand, refers to the seams the sunlight being radiant, Sun raises as usual, sends out the warm ray, covers diverges in the fog of hamlet gradually, smoke from kitchen chimneys of each family rose. This was in his life has duplicated a lot of times, an extremely ordinary morning, but from now henceforth, day and night, must cross like this, but he felt the nightmarish fear. 他走出神婆家,用手遮住眼睛,指缝间阳光璀璨,太阳照常升起,散发出温暖的光芒,笼罩在小村庄的雾霭渐渐散去,一家家的炊烟升了起来。这是他人生中中重复了千百次的,一个极平凡的早晨,而从今以后,日日夜夜,也要这样渡过,可是他感到了噩梦般的恐惧。 Going home in being absentminded, sits to the table by, has had the breakfast, has had the lunch, had the dinner, in the hand held the stone of that looks like child skull throughout, Sun fell, however will raise tomorrow. 失魂落魄的回到家中,坐到桌旁,吃了早饭,吃了午饭,吃了晚饭,手中始终抓住那个像小孩头骨的石头,太阳又落了下去,然而明天又将升起。 Crouching Bull Village was too small, the life was too light, anything passes on like the wind the quick, quick all people knew the Li the Second court attendant went crazy, visited, looks sighed, said that he was too deep with that Old Bull sentiment, for a while could not bear this attack has sent the hysteria sickness. 卧牛村太小了,生活太平淡了,任何事情都传的像风一样快,很快所有人都知道了李二郎发疯了,纷纷来探望,看了都叹息不已,说他跟那头老牛的感情太深了,一时承受不住这个打击・才发了癔症。 The moon/month upper culmination, he stands up from table finally, goes out of the gateway, arrives in the village by that ancient well sits in the blue stone of duplicate full moss, stares toward the well. 月上中天,他终于从桌边站起身来,走出门户,走到村中那一口古井旁・坐在覆满青苔的青石上,向着井中凝望。 The well water static screening bright moonlight, screens a thin face of youngster, has covered entirely the confused color. Was my this? Because of such dream? Even if that dream such as the smoke scattered, however the feeling in dream, actually throughout can hardly be removed. 井水静静的映出明月,映出一个少年的消瘦脸庞,布满了迷茫之色。我这到底是怎么了？就因为那样一个梦吗？然而即便那个梦已经如烟飘散,然而梦中的感觉,却始终挥之不去。 Is the strong bosom is intense, struggles furiously is laughs wildly indulges, is the love is the dead enmity! 是壮怀激烈,是奋力挣扎・是狂笑是放纵,是挚爱是死仇！ His expression is twisting, covers entirely the scar the hand firmly to hold that white stone. 他的表情扭曲着,布满伤痕的手紧紧抓住那块白石。 „Second son you do not move heedlessly, has any words saying that the cow dies cannot come back to life......” the Big Brother Li sound to shiver, for fear that he must drown in a well, was urging carelessly. “二郎・你・・・・・・可别乱动,有什么话都好说,牛死不能复生……”李大哥声音颤抖,生怕他是要投井,胡乱劝着。 „Mixes the boy, you were really insane! The day, your parents had also died early, my excrement holds up a baby so it can urinate you pulls such in a big way, you such to me!” Li the Eldest sister-in-law bellows was saying was saying, sobs. “混小子,你真疯了！日子还过不过了,你爹娘死得早,我一把屎一把尿把你拉扯这么大,你就这么对我！”李大嫂一声大吼・说着说着,抽泣起来。 The dog's bark sound spreads in the entire village, households of shine lights villagers wake up from the sleep, before long the time, encircled near the well Sir child, man woman, talking at once was urging him, making him can not look on the bright side of thing. 犬吠声响遍整个村里,一户户亮起灯火・村民们从睡梦中醒来,不一会儿功夫,就都围到了井边・大人孩子,男人女人,七嘴八舌的劝着他,让他一定不要想不开。 His vision crosses the crowd, crosses lies Bull Ridge, crosses the endless continuous 100,000 mountains, „Qingshan” two characters plunge into mind suddenly resembles the miraculous glow to dodge, he lowered the head muttered: „Qingshan!” 他的目光越过人群,越过卧牛岗,越过无尽连绵100000大山,“青山”二字忽然跳入脑海・似灵光一闪,他低下头・喃喃道:“青山！” „Big Brother, sells good money?” “大哥,卖牛的钱呢？” Crossed for a long time, he lifts the hand to ask suddenly. 过了许久,他忽然抬手问道。 „You you are waiting, my this takes!” Big Brother Li runs out of the crowd, will think of the silver money the pouch worn at the girdle to bring to give him quickly. “你・・・・・・你等着,我这就去拿！”李大哥冲出人群,很快将装着银钱的褡裢拿过来交给他。 He is looking several spindle silver slivers, are dodging the silver under the moonlight light, he has put the stone in hand, suddenly stands up, the crowd calmed down, an eye such is looking at him in pairs. 他望着其中几锭碎银,在月光下闪着银光,他将手中的石头放了进去,忽然站起身来,人群静了下来,一双双眼睛就这么望着他。 He looks in all directions about, designates the direction, moves toward outside the village. 他四顾左右,选定方向,走向村外。 The crowd had been blown by his facial expression, does not dare to stop, to separate the two sides, looks at his form to vanish under the moonlight. 人群被他的神情镇住了,不敢阻拦,分开两边,望着他的身影消失在月色下。 Big Brother Li and Li the Eldest sister-in-law wants to go forward to stop, however anchors the footsteps suddenly, on the face appears the strange expression. 李大哥与李大嫂想要上前阻拦,然而忽然停住脚步,脸上浮现出奇异的表情。 From the beginning, his footsteps are very heavy, where uninformed at sea must arrive. Gradually, his footsteps are but getting more and more lively, taking advantage of the bright moonlight, along soon was submerged the trail by the weed, stride stand forth. 一开始,他的脚步很沉重,茫然不知自己要走到哪里。可是渐渐的,他的脚步越来越轻快,借着明亮的月光,沿着快要被荒草淹没小径,大步向前走去。 Walked one all night, arrives in town, the skylight already put brightly, he stands before a butcher shop, big bull head, hangs on the meat rack, has an angle of rupture. The bull's eye circle opens the eyes, to lose the ordinary day gloss, a piece muddy vast. The fly dances in the air to linger, as if must for the death of this mediocre domestic animal, increase several bored footnotes again. 走了一整夜,走到镇子中,天光已然放亮,他站在一家肉铺前,一颗偌大的牛头,挂在肉架子上,有着一只断角。牛眼圆睁着,已失去平日的光泽,一片浑茫。苍蝇飞舞萦绕,似乎要为这平庸牲畜的死亡,再增添几个无聊的注脚。 However he clearly felt that muddy vast eye is gazing at him, with that familiar mild vision, the feeling face is suddenly moist, originally, has had tears streaming down the face. 然而他分明感觉,那双浑茫的眼睛在注视着他,用那熟悉温润的目光,忽然感觉脸庞湿润,原来在不知不觉间,已泪流满面。 „Little brother, you must buy any meat, yesterday had just killed a big bullock, but also is keeping many good meat!” Butcher shop boss somewhat strange asking. “小兄弟,你要买什么肉,昨天刚杀了一头大犍牛,还留着不少好肉呢！”肉铺老板有些奇怪的问道。 He aims at that bull head the hand. 他将手指向那个牛头。 A moment later, butcher shop boss gazes after him to depart he to welcome the dawn with the strange vision, the sunlight is covering the First Level ray for his big form, carries big bull head. 片刻之后,肉铺老板用奇异的目光目送他离去他迎着晨光,阳光为他高大的身影镀上一层光芒,身后背着一个偌大的牛头。 bull head is very heavy, in that white stone together with pouch worn at the girdle, heavy pressure on body. But that dreamland as if no longer faintly recognizable, became had the weight, was clear! 牛头很重,连同褡裢中那块白石,沉甸甸的压在身上。而那梦境似乎不再飘渺,变得有了重量,清晰起来！ Time slide by, change of the seasons. 光阴荏苒,斗转星移。 The youngster turned into the man, the man turn into old man, the line the long and trying journey, the situation in dream never appeared, but he is not willing to stop the footsteps, looking continuously looked! 少年变成汉子,汉子变成老人,行遍了千山万水,梦中的情境却从未出现,但他仍不肯停下脚步,一直的找啊找啊！ Finally in one day, he arrives at the mountain peak peak, stopped, once the big body the rickets, the clothing is ragged could not withstand, the bull head only remaining skulls that carries on the back, that white stone stroked gently bright and clean like bone, was heavier than the past. 终于在某一天,他走到山峰顶端,停了下来,曾经高大的身躯已经佝偻,衣衫更是褴褛不堪,背上的牛头只剩下头骨,那块白石被摩挲的光洁如骨,却比过去更加沉重。 The road when he turned head, looks are coming to pass through, once many opportunities can pause, enjoy safely pleasant, but thus and such and such, does not drink completely the wind and frost, does not have a thing in the world. 他回过头来,望着自己来时走过的路,曾经有多少次机会可以停步,享受平安喜乐,而非如此这般,饮尽风霜,一无所有。 He has a thought that perhaps he should not come out, perhaps he was insane dozens years ago, therefore saw Crouching Bull Village, saw who same on the brink of old age are the descendants circles the knee, secure enjoys the old age. 他不禁生出个念头,或许他就不该出来,或许他在几十年前就已经疯了,于是又看到了卧牛村,看到同样垂老的自己已是子孙绕膝,安享晚年。 Regretted? 后悔了吗？ He the bull head bone of turning yellow uses old both hands to carry on the back takes down, wearing slowly on face, is hand-held with one, another hand puts out by his body temperature nice and warm white stone, is staring for a long time, suddenly has smiled, laughter more and more loud, is mixed the fierce cough, cough the blood, incarnadine snow white beard. 他用苍老的双手将背上的发黄的牛头骨取下,缓缓的戴在脸上,用一只手扶着,另一只手拿出被他体温暖热的白石,长久的凝视着,忽然笑了起来,笑声越来越响,间杂着剧烈的咳嗽,一口口咳出鲜血,染红雪白的胡子。 Thump however, the laughter stops suddenly, he face upwards to fall to the ground, is looking at the boundless sky, said one: „Regrets!” 怦然一声,笑声戛然而止,他仰天倒地,望着苍茫的天空,道了一声:“后悔个屁！” The death inundated to well up, sank to the boundless darkness, suddenly, a butterfly soaring in the limitless darkness, has the indescribable riotous color, flowed out piece by piece similarly indescribable pigment, dyed on this black theater curtain. 死亡漫涌上来,沉入无边黑暗中,忽然间,一只蝴蝶飞翔在无边无际的黑暗中,有着无法形容的缤纷色彩,流泻一片片同样无法形容的颜料,染在这黑色的幕布上。
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