This time, his at present is a warm flame. 这一次,他的眼前是一片温暖的火光。 What sits side him is his parents and younger sister, mother look is anxious, but the father whole face is serious. 坐在他身边的是他的父母和妹妹,母亲神色忧虑,而父亲则满脸严肃。 A moment later, the father says: 片刻之后,父亲开口说道: „You must enroll the college entrance examination, I will not be blocking you, but, you must know, at home is very presently difficult.” “你要去参加高考,我是不会拦着你的,但是,你也要知道,现在家里很困难。” „I and your mother is not healthy, your younger sister has not gotten married, is raising by us, therefore, even if you were accepted, we really do not have money to go to big city to attend the university for you.” “我和你妈的身体不好了,你妹妹又还没出嫁,还是靠我们养着,所以,哪怕你考上了,我们也实在没有钱供你去大城市里读大学。” „Can you only by yourself, know? In the city does not seem like our countryside, asks for stuttering is not easy, I heard, before the child of Wang Family/prince, after was tested, cannot treat in the city, this year comes back to farm.” “你只能靠自己,知道吗？城里不像是我们乡下,讨一口吃的不容易,我听说,之前王家的孩子,就是考出去了以后在城里待不下去,今年又回来种地了。” „You must study, must strive to the country, we are support, but, you must have a look, we cannot give this strength!” “你要读书,要给国家出力,我们都是支持的,但是,你也要看看,我们出不出得起这个力！” Said in father's words the flash, in Ye Zhou's mind swamped into the huge information flow suddenly. 在父亲的话说完的一瞬间,叶舟的脑海中突然涌入了巨大的信息流。 But this time information flow and past were different, it coerced incessantly was the information, extremely complex mood. 而这一次的信息流与以往不同,它所裹挟的不止是信息,还有极其复杂的情绪。 Frightened and hesitant, fears difficulties and feels inferior timidly, ....... 恐惧、犹豫、畏难、自卑、怯懦....... These mood incomparably really presented in Ye Zhou's mind, in this moment, he realized clearly made the mood that he vacillated fluctuate ---- Even if clear(ly) knows oneself place during the simulation, he is also incapable of resisting this fluctuation. 这些情绪无比真实地呈现在了叶舟的脑海之中,在这一刻,他真真切切地体会到了让他动摇的情绪波动----哪怕明知道自己身处模拟之中,他也无力抗拒这种波动。 Yes, the father said right. 是啊,父亲说得对。 Oneself are just an ordinary child of rural family background, even if on studying some talents, is what's the big deal? Can oneself be admitted to a university through the college entrance examination? 自己只不过是一个农村出身的普通孩子,哪怕在读书上有一些天赋,可是那又如何呢？自己能通过高考考上大学？ Own competitor may not only be these children in countryside, but is all examinees across the country! 自己的竞争对手可不仅仅是乡下的这些孩子,而是全国各地的所有考生！ They with oneself different, their living conditions since childhood want on a good big truncation, oneself take great pains to look at the innumerable teaching materials, to them is just a basic reading material, oneself ponder over not the clear difficult problem, to them is similar to the potluck to be equally simple. 他们跟自己不一样,他们从小的生活条件要比自己好上一大截,自己不厌其烦看过无数遍的教材,对他们来说只不过是一本入门读物,自己思前想后也不明白的难题,对他们来说就如同家常便饭一样简单。 Why must believe, oneself can be stronger than them? 凭什么要认为,自己可以比他们更强呢？ Is impossible. 不可能的。 Draws back 10,000 steps, even if oneself really hit transported greatly, tests good achievements in the college entrance examination that just reinstated, was enrolled by the university, what to do but should the later matter? 退一万步来讲,哪怕自己真的撞了大运,在刚刚恢复的高考中考出了一个好成绩,被大学录取了,可之后的事情应该怎么办？ Goes to school? What money with goes to school? Changes money in these crops of home laborious farm with the parents, then makes them starve? 去上学？拿什么钱去上学？拿父母在家辛苦种地的那些收成去换钱,然后让他们挨饿吗？ No, not only this. 不,不只是这样。 Even if the school expense has the country to undertake, may hear that in the university at least needs to hand over 30 jin (0.5 kg) grain every month, these 30 jin (0.5 kg) grains, in their family/home cannot collect. 哪怕学费有国家承担,可听说大学里每月至少要交30斤粮,这30斤粮,他们家里是凑不出来的。 If went, oneself can really starve to death in the city? 如果去了,自己会不会真的饿死在城里？ Meeting? 会吧？ Is alone and friendless , grotesque and gaudy and indifferent brutal city all alone. 举目无亲、无依无靠、光怪陆离、冷漠无情的城市。 Oneself have not gone, has not understood its city of real appearance truly. 自己从来没有去过,也从来没有真正了解过它的真实面貌的城市。 Perhaps, giving up is the best choice. 也许,放弃才是最好的选择。 Perhaps, oneself should stay in small mountain village honestly, farms with the parents, will the later life also be probably getting better and better? 也许,自己就应该老老实实地呆在小山村里,跟着父母种地,以后的生活大概也会越来越好？ Such idea emerges one after another, leaf boat almost must lose the standpoint, said that „I not to go”. 这样的想法接二连三地涌现,叶舟几乎已经要失去立场,说出那句“我不去了”。 But in an instance, in his brain suddenly has thunderclap together to flash through probably. 可就在一个瞬间,他的脑子里突然像是有一道炸雷闪过。 He does not have the means not to go, this is his only opportunity. 他没办法不去,这是他唯一的机会。 The choice that he must make, will not only affect a family's destiny is so simple absolutely. 他所要做出的选择,绝对不仅仅是会影响一个家庭的命运那么简单。 At this moment, or historical that moment, the decision that he makes, will affect the entire Huaxia in the enormous degree at the quantum computation domain advancement. 在此刻,或者说在历史上的那一刻,他所作出的决定,将会在极大程度上影响整个华夏在量子计算领域的进程。 Although from this time, how he has not made clear the influence on happen temporarily. 虽然从这个时候来看,他暂时还没有搞清楚影响是怎么发生的。 „I must go!” “我必须去！” leaf boat replied firmly. 叶舟坚定地回答道。 The father deeply sighs , to continue saying: 父亲深深叹了一口气,继续开口说道: „That goes. I know, you do not rush to will not be resigned, but, you must remember, if really did not go on living came back, we also wanted you to care for the aged!” “那就去吧。我知道,你不去闯一闯是不会甘心的,但是,你要记得,如果真的活不下去了就回来,我们还要你养老！” leaf boat nods silent. 叶舟沉默地点了点头。 He has not known the experience of status master temporarily he simulates, will therefore not have the confidence to say „me certainly to mix a positive result well” this brave words. 他暂时还不知道他所模拟的身份主人的经历,所以也没有信心去说出“我一定会好好混出一番名堂”这种豪言壮语。 The mother has not spoken, but stands up to leaf boat packs the baggage. 母亲没有说话,只是站起身来给叶舟收拾行李。 „Mother...... I come.” “妈......我来吧。” leaf boat somewhat says difficultly. 叶舟有些艰难地开口说道。 At this time his in the mind was still attacked by the complex mood unceasingly, to worry, to family's responsibility and dependence to native land parents...... 此时他的脑海中仍旧被复杂的情绪不断冲击,对父母的担忧、对家庭的责任、对故土的依恋...... This all sorts of mood interwine, even if he has made the decision, but this decision is not firm. 这种种情绪交织在一起,哪怕他已经作出了决定,可这个决定却并不坚定。 Perhaps only needs a small perturbation, his mood will collapse again. 也许只需要一个小小的扰动,他的情绪就会再次崩溃。 But this perturbation, comes very promptly. 而这个扰动,来得非常及时。 The gate of room was sounded, what walks is in this village only mountain village teacher. 房间的门被敲响,走进来的是这个村庄里唯一一个山村教师。 „Teacher Li, you came...... to sit quickly sit quickly.” “李老师,你来了......快坐快坐。” leaf boat looked that to this man who wears the eyeglasses, but the opposite party also happen to looked to him. 叶舟看向这个戴着眼镜的男人,而对方也正好看向了他。 A moment later, he says: 片刻之后,他开口说道: „leaf boat, I know that you want to gain admission to the university, wants a becoming outstanding opportunity, but, such opportunity, here also has one.” “叶舟,我知道你想去考大学,想要一个出人头地的机会,但是,这样的机会,我这里也有一个。” „County Cultural work group is increasing enrollment, they need the calligraphy teacher, is mainly participates in the activity of children's palace, teaches the child in children's palace to write.” “县文工团在扩招,他们需要书法老师,主要是去参加少年宫的活动,教少年宫的小孩写字。” „Wages are very high ---- Compared with my present wages high several times, this has the work of face very much, you can contact many people through these children.” “工资很高----比我现在的工资高好几倍,并且,这是个很有面子的工作,你可以通过那些小孩接触到很多人。” „Your character writes very well, I felt, you should try.” “你的字写得很好,我觉得,你应该去试试。” „Do you understand my meaning? Becoming outstanding, may not by studying.” “你懂我的意思吗？出人头地,不一定要靠读书。” Hears this saying, leaf boat gawked gawked. 听到这话,叶舟愣了一愣。 He knows what this Teacher Li said is right. 他知道这个李老师说的是对的。 Not is only because he memory in simulation, is being prescient that because he looks at from the dozens years later historical round trips. 不仅仅是因为他在模拟中的记忆,更是因为他从几十年后的历史往回看的先知先觉。 In this age, young people who has the culture and meeting calligraphy, so long as made contact with cultural work group line, almost does not have unable to develop well. 在这个年代,一个有文化、会书法的年轻人,只要搭上了文工团这条线,几乎没有不能好好发展的。 Not to mention what this line contact is the child in children's palace, these can enter the children in children's palace are any family background, was needless saying that also knows. 更不用说这条线接触的是少年宫的小孩,这些能进少年宫的小孩都是些什么家庭背景,不用说也知道。 This truly is an opportunity, moreover is a very big opportunity. 这确实是一个机会,而且是一个很大的机会。 If really according to this road development, studies, important? 如果真的按照这条路发展的话,读不读书,重要吗？ At the same time, is to go to another region, struggles to seek livehood in the strange city ; At the same time, is can attain the wages subsidy immediately home, and excellent development opportunity. 一边,是要远赴他乡,在陌生的城市里挣扎求生;一边,是立刻就可以拿到工资补贴家用,并且也还有极好的发展机会。 Perhaps to any rational person, knows that which should elect one side. 恐怕对任何一个理性的人来说,都知道应该选哪一边。 However, leaf boat exactly is not the true rational person. 但是,叶舟恰好不是真正理性的人。 He is an idealist. 他是一个理想主义者。 He wants to handle a bigger matter, wants to yield a bigger achievement, wants to be the scientist, to do the research, to go completely to change this country and this world. 他想做更大的事情,想要获得更大的成果,想要去做科学家、去做研究、去彻底改变这个国家、这个世界。 The only issue is, can oneself achieve? 唯一的问题是,自己能做到吗？ The contradictory and chaotic idea interweaves in Ye Zhou's mind , his as if presents an illusion gradually at present. 矛盾和纷乱的想法在叶舟的脑海中交织,渐渐地,他的眼前似乎出现了一种幻觉。 His present no longer was this narrowing hut, but was in the childhood, he had climbed that duplicate suffused the mountain of snow and ice. 他眼前的不再是这间逼仄的小屋了,而是童年里,他曾经攀登过的那座覆盖满了冰雪的大山。 Just, the mountain of present, by all negative thoughts, all obstructions and all utility pursues ** composes. 只不过,现在的这座大山,是由所有的负面念头、所有的阻挠、所有功利追求的**组成的。 At the foot of the hill, is calm and steady tranquilly and even likely the abundant life. 山脚下,是安稳平静、甚至很可能富足的生活。 Behind the mountain, is that he pursues is broader, the profounder world. 山后面,是他所追求的那一个更广阔、更深远的世界。 His ideal after the mountain. 他的理想在山后。 But if must realize this ideal, he must first cross the mountain in heart. 可是如果要实现这个理想,他必须先翻过自己心中的这座山。 Wants the mountaineering. 要登山。 leaf boat grasps the head, he feels in this moment, is 100% real pain. 叶舟抱住脑袋,在这一刻他所感受到的,是百分之百真实的痛苦。 That the pain by the choice being brought. 那种由选择带来的痛苦。 He in mountaineering. 他在登山。 He is very slow and also incomparably climbing up difficultly. 他在无比缓慢、也无比艰难地攀爬着。 The barrier on this mountain was eliminated with the rational thought by him one after another absolutely, but is supporting his will, is actually a perceptual idealism. 这座山上的障碍被他一条一条地用绝对理性的思维排除,而支撑着他的意志的,却是一种感性的理想主义。 To family's responsibility? This and own pursue does not conflict, even after having acquired achievements from study, he instead can shoulder this responsibility well. 对家庭的责任？这与自己的追求并不冲突,甚至在学有所成之后,他反而能更好地承担这份责任。 Dependence native land? The people must grow, must drift. 依恋故土？人总要成长的,也总要去漂泊。 Fear to strange city? He engages in introspection, for own ideal, even if pays with the life also to refuse to balk, why can fear a city? 对陌生的城市的恐惧？他扪心自问,为了自己的理想,哪怕是付出生命也在所不惜,为什么要惧怕一座城市？ Another choice? No, that is never his choice, he is never resigned in this. 另一个选择？不,那从来就不是他的选择,他从来就不甘心于此。 ...... ...... Long time later, leaf boat lifted the head finally. 良久之后,叶舟终于抬起了头。 His look is very bright. 他的眼神无比明亮。 „I must go to the college entrance examination, I must study the math, I must study the physics, I must do the research.” “我要去高考,我要学数学,我要学物理,我要做研究。” „I must change this country, then makes our countries change this world.” “我要改变这个国家,然后让我们的国家改变这个世界。” „Father, mother, I am only cannot be filial to the utmost at this time, will not be can never be filial to the utmost.” “爸,妈,我只是此时不能尽孝,并不是永远不能尽孝。” „Your son is the eagle, the eagle is doomed to fly the snowy mountain, now, mountain here.” “你的儿子是鹰,鹰注定要飞过雪山,现在,山就在这里。” Looks at opposite everyone's complex look, leaf boat instead feels relieved. 看着对面所有人复杂的眼神,叶舟反而如释重负。 This mountain, he ascended. 这座山,他登上去了。