Huai Shi opens the eye, sees the out of the window afternoon light. 槐诗睁开眼睛,看到窗外午后的光。 The dust is separated from the ceiling, in great disorder in the pale yellow light is waving. In the air is flooding the familiar stale taste, heard the water drop sound of next door. 尘埃从天花板上脱离,在昏黄的光里乱七八糟地舞动着。空气中充斥着熟悉的霉味,听见了隔壁的滴水声。 This is his family/home. 这是他的家。 After an illusion, he is lying down on the broken sofa in hall. 一场幻梦之后,他正躺在大厅里的破沙发上。 „Am I...... also living? How long did I rest?” “我……还活着？我睡了多久？” He crawls at a loss, feels own chest, saw that the wound good is hitting the bandage well, has a labor pain faintly, but moves unexpectedly unobstructive. 他茫然地爬起来,摸着自己的胸口,看到伤口上好好地打着绷带,隐隐有所阵痛,但竟然活动无碍。 Especially he discovered, Book of Fate transforms from the entity to own will in unexpectedly, so long as the intention moves can change. 尤其他发现,命运之书竟然从实体转换到自己的意志里,只要心念一动就能够自行翻动。 Quick, he heard sound. 很快,他听见了身旁的声音。 „Good that probably ten about hours, it seems like you restore.” “大概十来个小时左右吧,看来你恢复的不错。” Sits the young girl before window looks up him, the tranquil facial features made Huai Shi anxious. 坐在窗前的少女抬起头看着他,平静的面容令槐诗不安起来。 „Actually last night...... to have what? Right, old willow, old willow he......” “昨晚究竟……发生了什么？对了,老柳,老柳他……” „Liu Dongli? He is living, now the surgery should end, in ICU......, if restores, later also has the opportunity to wake probably. However this is not your mistake, rather, stared also to be able the life by Green Day to be lucky.” “柳东黎？啊,他活着,现在手术应该已经结束了,正在重症监护室里……如果恢复好的话,大概以后还有机会能醒过来。不过这并不是你的错,倒不如说,被绿日盯上还能活命已经是万幸了。” Ai Qing tranquil said/tunnel: „Although had a lot last night, but also made the secret evil behind-the-scenes manipulator escape...... to you, all these had finished.” 艾晴平静地道:“虽然昨晚发生了很多事情,还让幕后黑手逃掉了……不过对你而言,这一切已经结束了。” „Finished?” “结束了？” „Right, finished.” Ai Qing nods, „in any event, the following matter had had nothing to do with you, later some people will not stare at you not to put.” “对,结束了。”艾晴颔首,“不论如何,接下来的事情已经和你无关了,以后再也不会有人盯着你不放了。” She is staring at Huai Shi, told him seriously: 她凝视着槐诗,郑重地告诉他: „Congratulates you, you can return to the original calm life.” “恭喜你,你可以回到原本的平静生活中去了。” If yesterday, Ai Qing told him, he will certainly be overjoyed, dances with joy, yet now, hears this news, he completely could not be happy. 如果在昨天的时候,艾晴这么告诉他的话,他一定会乐不可支,手舞足蹈,可如今,听到这个消息,他却完全开心不起来。 Even does not have any responded happily. 甚至没有任何愉快地反应。 Ai Qing has not said anything again, after book the preparation leaves, after refusing Huai Shi to see off, oneself use the walking stick to set out to say goodbye. 艾晴没有再说什么,合起了书之后准备离开,拒绝了槐诗相送之后,自己撑着拐杖起身道别。 „What's wrong?” “怎么了？” She sees the Huai Shi absent-minded appearance, crooked excessive: „What also has to ask? If you worried that Liu Dongli stops the car(riage) here, two days of some people will have driven away, relax, will come to call you before.” 她看到槐诗恍惚的样子,歪过头:“还有什么想要问的么？如果你担心柳东黎停在这里的车,过两天会有人开走的,放心,来之前会给你打电话。” Huai Shi shakes the head, looks at her: „I these days have actually been thinking, actually where to have seen you.” 槐诗摇头,看着她:“我这些日子其实一直在想,究竟在什么地方见到过你。” „......” “……” Ai Qing is silent, for a long time, shakes the head tranquilly: „Cannot think that also no relations, in any case is not the important matter, forgot to forget.” 艾晴沉默,许久,平静地摇头:“想不起来也没什么关系,反正不是什么重要的事情,忘就忘了吧。” Out she goes out, finally looked at Huai Shi, nods says goodbye. 她走出门外,最后看了一眼槐诗,颔首道别。 „That, I must embark to go to Jinling now immediately to report on activities, wish your future life sail geomancy, hopes that we can do not say goodbye.” “那么,我现在要立刻出发去金陵进行述职了,祝你今后的人生一帆风水,希望我们能够不要再见吧。” She said: „Parted forever, Huai Shi.” 她说:“永别了,槐诗。” The gate closed. 门关上了。 Silent, Huai Shi is silent, looks that Ai Qing enters in the car(riage) under supporting by the arm of driver, the vehicle door closed, walks away slowly, finally vanished the end of road. 寂静里,槐诗沉默着,看着艾晴在司机的搀扶下走进车里,车门关上了,缓缓走远,最后消失到了路的尽头去。 …… …… …… …… Throughout the afternoon, Huai Shi sits on the stair of garden, that belongs to his previous place, looks at the bare plant nursery, is in a daze. 整个下午,槐诗都坐在花园的台阶上,那个属于他的老地方,看着光秃秃的苗圃,发呆。 „Moved, right?” “怅然若失,对吧？” The crow does not know when braves, stands on his shoulder, patted his head: „ Do not be sad, come, smokes to relax? 乌鸦不知道什么时候又冒出来,站在他的肩膀上,拍了拍他的脑袋:“别难过,来,抽根烟放松一下？ Really is not good buys bottle of liquor to drink two, sleeps in low spirits, anything finished up. ” 实在不行买瓶酒喝两口,闷头睡一觉,什么都完事儿了。” „Finished up?” “完事儿了？” Huai Shi looks at her. 槐诗看着她。 „Right, finished up.” The crow asked superficially: „This did not finish, Huai Shi? If such that you hope, you had gotten rid of these in great disorder things, welcomes calm life that oneself harbored intentions.” “对,完事儿了。”乌鸦轻描淡写地问:“这不是都结束了么,槐诗？如你所愿的那样,你已经摆脱了那些乱七八糟的事情,迎回了自己心心念念的平静生活。” Huai Shi had not replied. 槐诗没有回答。 Finished? 结束了吗？ Perhaps, but he estimated that during the extrication has not arrived. 或许吧,可他预想之中的解脱并没有到来。 Has not felt relieved, even, has not known that came the anger that...... anything not to finish from where obviously is right. 没有如释重负,甚至,还有一丝不知道从何处而来的愤怒……明明什么都没有结束才对。 He remembers old Yang's face suddenly. 他忽然想起老杨的脸。 The final that flash, that bastard looks at own time, is smiling unexpectedly, once is dying can extricate probably were the same. 最后的那一瞬间,那个王八蛋看自己的时候,竟然是笑着的,一旦要死了就好像能够解脱了一样。 What cannot extricate obviously, he just sold oneself life to trade the life of another person, is been happy by that woman who he did save? 明明什么都没有能够解脱,他只不过是卖了自己的命去换另一个人的命而已,难道被他救的那个女人会开心吗？ He actually in self-satisfied what vigor? 他究竟在得意个什么劲儿啊？ Now Liu Dongli in ICU. 还有如今在重症监护室里的柳东黎。 Once Huai Shi thought that they are oneself friend, but in them, from was opened fire by oneself now behind, opens fire in oneself behind. 曾经槐诗都觉得他们是自己的朋友,可如今他们之中,有一个被自己从身后开了一枪,有一个在自己身后开了一枪。 He lost two friends. 他失去了两个朋友。 But all these setters have actually slipped away...... 而这一切的始作俑者却已经溜之大吉…… „How can finish suddenly?” “怎么就能忽然结束呢？” He lifts the hand to cover the face, cannot bear angry and exhausted in heart again, „damn......” 他抬起手捂住面孔,再忍不住心中的愤怒和疲惫,“他妈的……” The crow pities looks at him. 乌鸦怜悯地看着他。 For a long time, she has seen the Huai Shi so angry appearance for the first time. 这么长时间以来,她第一次看到槐诗如此愤怒的样子。 In addition, regardless of probably runs into anything, his only brazen-faced and shameless paralysis on the ground, whatever the chaotic fate wheel grinds from oneself, like an old salt fish. 除此之外,好像不论碰到任何事情,他都只会死皮赖脸地瘫在地上,任由乱糟糟的命运车轮从自己身上碾过去,如同一条老咸鱼。 Inborn good nature. 天生的好脾气。 He by him, in any case I is also happy. 他强由他强,反正我也爽。 But she always felt, the body of Huai Shi was short of anything, is concealing anything, or...... tries to hide anything. 可是她却总觉得,槐诗的身上欠缺了什么,掩饰着什么,或者……试图隐藏着什么。 Until now, she understands indistinctly, perhaps this empty garden, is the place that he most relaxes, only then here, he will face himself confidently. 直到现在,她才隐约地明白,或许这一片空空荡荡的花园,才是他最放松的地方,只有在这里,他才会坦然地面对自己。 Even if in his heart so resists to here- 纵然他的心中对这里如此地抗拒- „I said that Huai Shi.” She asked earnestly, „what vital significance here does have to you?” “我说,槐诗。”她认真地问,“这里对你有什么重要的意义吗？” „Probably......” “大概吧……” Huai Shi looks down that small garden under stair, silent was very long. 槐诗低头看着台阶下的那一片小小的花园,沉默了很久。 „If not want to say when I have not asked.” The crow shakes the head: „After all spies on the privacy is not has the face matter very much.” “如果不想说的话就当我没问吧。”乌鸦摇头:“毕竟窥探隐私也不是什么很有面子的事情。” „No, had no concealment necessary in any case, actually I in want how to tell you.” “不,反正也没什么隐瞒的必要了,我只是在想究竟怎么跟你说。” Huai Shi rubbed the face, hesitates for a long time, seriously is pondering. 槐诗揉了揉脸,沉吟许久,认真地思考着。 He said, „when I was young, had had a high fever.” 他说,“在我小的时候,曾经发过一次高烧。” „ At that time my parents were angry very much, because they play externally, I have not taken care of myself good, does not make them be free from worry, then called money me, making me go to the hospital. “当时我的父母很生气,因为他们在国外玩,我没有照顾好自己,不让他们省心,然后给我打了钱,让我自己去医院。 But I was too at that time sleepy, is too uncomfortable, has not gone, fell asleep on the sofa of living room. ” 可我当时太困了,太难受,就没有去,在客厅的沙发上睡着了。” Huai Shi said, „ I remember at that time I had had very strange dream, dreams of me to grow the wing to fly in the space probably, dreams of this old house to speak, wipes away sweat and pours water to me, afterward I heard sound that circumvents, some people turn from the backyard, hoodwinks the face, in the hand is also grabbing the blade...... I to hide behind the gate, does not dare to speak. 槐诗说,“我记得当时我做过很多很奇怪的梦,梦见我好像长出翅膀在天上飞,梦见这一座老房子会说话,给我擦汗和倒水,后来我听见翻墙的声音,有人从后院里翻进来,蒙着脸,手里还抓着刀……我藏在门后面,不敢说话。 I am afraid very much, if I were discovered by that person, I am possibly dying. ” 我很害怕,如果我被那个人发现的话,我可能就要死了。” „I do not want dead.” “我不想死。” He stares at the ground that is sticking out together, in a soft voice twittering: „Therefore I killed him.” 他凝视着那一块隆起的地面,轻声呢喃:“所以我杀了他。” „......” “……” The crow was shocked, turn head looks at the face of Huai Shi, actually could not find any trace of cracking a joke, only has a discomforting tranquility. 乌鸦愣住了,回头看着槐诗的脸,却找不到任何开玩笑的痕迹,只有一片令人不安的平静。 „Right.” “没错。” Huai Shi repeated tranquilly, „I killed him.” 槐诗平静地重复了一遍,“我杀了他。” Hides after the gate, with axe, when that person comes, aims at the back of the head to divide. 躲在门后,用斧头,在那个人进来的时候,对准后脑勺劈下去。 Only used, that person but actually. 只用了一下,那个人就倒了。 Then came, came, till not having strength. 然后再来了一下,又来了一下,直到没有力气为止。 Discovered that after that person moves lets it go, first is vacant, is anxious and flurried, finally appears is lets itself for the frightened courage unexpectedly. 发现那个人动不了了之后,先是茫然,然后是不安和慌乱,最后所浮现的竟然是让自己都为之恐惧的勇气。 In the murkiness of high fever, he dragged out in the corpse the garden, dug up the ground, buried it quietly, axe same place. 就在高热的昏沉中,他将尸体拖到了花园里,挖开地面,悄悄地将它埋了进去,连带着斧头一起。 Closed the earth, washed cleanly the hand, returned to the bed. 合上了土,洗干净了手,回到床上。 It seems anything not to happen to be the same. 就好像什么事情都没发生一样。 The chalcedony hall is so in any case remote, some people will not come, the parents are so in any case lazy, will not respond the garden, some people will not find in any case, oneself killed people. 反正石髓馆这么偏僻,不会有人来,反正父母这么懒,也不会搭理花园,反正也不会有人发现,自己杀人了。 Then, goes off in the fear, had many strange dreams, but these dreams do not remember, the beforehand some memory same places, after waking up, the high fever drew back unexpectedly inconceivable. 就这样,在恐惧中睡去,又做了很多奇怪的梦,但那些梦都不记得了,连带着以前的一些记忆一起,醒来之后,高烧竟然不可思议地退了。 May starting from that moment, the Huai Shi childhood then finish. 可从那一刻开始起,槐诗的童年便结束了。 Henceforth, day after day, year after year. 从此,日复一日,年复一年。 „To come carefully, I really am the luck have good luck ever after greatly, yes?” “仔细想来,我真是福大命大的,是吧？” Huai Shi said in a soft voice, „ just started, I am afraid some people to catch me very much, some people found that I bury the thing in garden, but no one has discovered to the present probably...... 槐诗轻声说,“刚开始,我很害怕有人来抓我,有人发现我埋在花园里的东西,可是到现在好像一直没有人发现…… If had not concealed in the past, now also has no need such tired, no, if were massacred in the past, does not seem like now is the same, will live is unable to continue watching by oneself. ” 如果当年没有隐瞒的话,现在也用不着这么累吧,不,如果当年被杀掉的话,也不会像是现在一样,活得让自己都看不下去。” „...... Actually you do not have necessary to suffer itself.” “……其实你没必要折磨自己。” The crow cannot bear the sigh: „Have you thought such a possibility? Perhaps, this is also your high fever time one of the nightmares making.” 乌鸦忍不住叹息:“你有没有想过这样一种可能？或许,这也不过是你高烧的时候做的噩梦之一。” „Yes, perhaps?” “是啊,或许呢？” Huai Shi nods tranquilly, „ I have bought many times shovels, may lose many times. 槐诗平静地点头,“我买过很多次铲子,可又丢了很多次。 Each I stand time the time here will hesitate, is actually afraid under this to hide anything. Actually I am not afraid dig out the corpse, but I am afraid the truth. ” 每一次我站在这里的时候都会犹豫,害怕这下面究竟藏着什么东西。其实我并不害怕挖出尸体,可我害怕真相。” He said that „, if I dig up here, I do not have the means to deceive itself again- when the time comes, how do I also return to my tranquil life again?” 他说,“如果我把这里挖开的话,我就没办法再欺骗自己-到时候,我还怎么再去回到自己的宁静生活里去呢？” He stopped, suddenly smiles in a soft voice: „I think oneself with self-deception for a lifetime.” 他停顿了一下,忽然轻声笑起来:“我本来以为自己会自欺欺人地过一辈子。” „- The present looks like, does not have necessary to dread anything again.” “-如今看来,已经没有必要再畏惧什么了。” Saying, Huai Shi took up in the corner already the iron shovel that rusts, returned to the center of garden, is seeking for the initial mark, stood firm. 说着,槐诗拿起了角落里已经生锈的铁铲,回到了花园的中央,寻找着当初的标记,站定了。 Then, the first handful of earth were shovelled. 然后,第一捧土被铲起。 The crow is stunned. 乌鸦愕然。 Then is the second shovel, the third shovel. 然后是第二铲,第三铲。 Huai Shi movement fast, even if the wound under bandage cracks, seeps out the blood threads, hesitation that has no again. 槐诗的动作飞快,哪怕绷带下的伤口崩裂,渗出血丝,再没有任何的迟疑。 Chisels weeds that is in the way, moves the underground root system, digs out to bury the earth and mud of nightmare. 凿掉碍事儿的野草,铲掉地下的根系,挖出掩埋噩梦的土和泥。 Sweating profusely. 挥汗如雨。 „You know? The matter in my family......” “你知道的吧？我家里的事……” Huai Shi is turning away from the crow, spoke to her, seemed like thought aloud: „ Actually I am very clear, started from the birth, my parents without liking me, after the grandfather passed away, they would have no again to manage- they did not need me. 槐诗背对着乌鸦,跟她说话,又像是自言自语:“其实我很清楚,从出生开始,我的父母就没有喜欢过我,爷爷去世之后,他们就没有再管过-他们根本不需要我。 They, I seem like a being in the way burden, after they walk, I turn into the homeless wild dog. Robs peter to pay paul, sewing and mending improper so many years. 他们在的时候,我像是一个碍事的累赘,他们走之后,我又变成无家可归的野狗。就这么拆东墙补西墙,缝缝补补苟苟且且过了这么多年。 By the present, if cannot make money again, incessantly is the school expense, must not go on living...... I to feel value that exactly such life has no. 到现在,如果再赚不到钱的话,不止是学费,就连活都要活不下去……我自己都觉得这样的人生没有任何的价值可言。 Actually I am even thinking frequently, actually lives such tired why? 其实连我自己都经常在想,活得这么累究竟为什么呢？ Always is so in any case miserable, no matter how struggles uselessly, sometimes must be ridiculed and looked down upon. Occasionally gives up not being suddenly more relaxed? 反正总是这么惨,不管怎么挣扎都没什么用,有时候还要被人嘲笑和看不起。偶尔放弃一下不会更轻松么？ Even if but how to lose again, how painstakingly, I thought again I can still support. Even if must betray the dignity not to relate occasionally, I will not be angry. 可就算是再怎么丧,再怎么苦,我觉得自己也能撑下去。哪怕偶尔要出卖尊严也没关系,我不会生气。 Because I know, so long as I am still continue proceed, all will be good. 因为我知道,只要我还在继续往前走,一切都会好起来的。 Even if this change is always insignificant. 哪怕这变化总是微不足道。 Has the person like old Yang to be willing to introduce specially work to me, occasionally looks to give a pretext many to my some money, old willow is willing to ask me to eat meal, gives me the trouble that makes in the office to tidy up the conclusion, even if the back were opened a spear/gun by me, dangerous time is still thinking makes me run away...... 有像老杨那样的人愿意专门介绍工作给我,偶尔找借口多给我一些钱,还有老柳愿意请我吃饭,给我在会所里惹出来的麻烦收拾收尾,就算背后被我开一枪,危险的时候也想着让我逃走…… This was not explaining my life has a value? ” 这不正说明我的人生是有所价值的么？” Huai Shi asked in a soft voice, but no one responded to his words, the sweat dripped down from his face, drops already in the earth pit that was dug. 槐诗轻声问,可是却没有人回应他的话语,汗水从他脸上滴下来,落进已经被刨开的土坑里。 „But now-” “可现在-” His dangling eye, the pickaxe lifts again, under the shovel, exerts to go all-out. 他垂下眼睛,铁镐再次抬起,铲下,奋尽全力。 Like must chop into pieces in the memory that fierce face. 如同要劈碎记忆中那一张狰狞的面孔。 „My value, was denied!” “我的价值,被否定了！” Collapse! 崩！ The shovel hit probably on anything, collapsed the giant opening, but in the pit actually anything could not see, without corpse, did not have the skeleton, anything did not have. 铁锹好像撞在了什么东西上,崩出了巨大的裂口,可是坑里却什么都看不见,没有尸体,也没有骸骨,什么都没有。 Only the setting sun scattered in disorder glow shines upon a cruel outline indistinctly. 只有夕阳散乱的辉光隐约映照出一个残忍的轮廓。 Looking like the axe is the same. 就像是斧子一样。 Huai Shi bends the waist, puts out a hand, gets hold of its . 槐诗弯下腰,伸手,握紧它的柄。 He said: 他说: „- I must kill him.” “-我要杀了他。” Under the setting sun, the crow looks at the outline in Huai Shi hand stunned- purely by elementium the invisible iron of casting, the anger and ice-cold killing intent of combustion mixes in one, shone upon the cruel light. 在夕阳之下,乌鸦错愕地看着槐诗手中的轮廓-纯粹以源质所铸造的无形之铁,燃烧的愤怒和冰冷的杀意混合在一处,映照出了残忍的光。 Since that has been seven years the deep sleep and died in this's killing intent is given the essence, and creates steel arming that becomes by the nightmare frightened. 那是七年以来沉睡于此的杀意和死亡被赋予了实质,以噩梦和恐惧所缔造而成的钢铁武装。 Probably got hold of the fire seed to be the same, in that flash, the right hand of Huai Shi was lit by that invisible strength, ascends the white flame. 就好像握紧了火种一样,在那一瞬间,槐诗的右手被那无形的力量点燃,升腾起白色的火焰。 From the dreariness in revealed that touches the type truly. 自沉寂中显露真正地摸样。 „So that's how it is, so that's how it is......” “原来如此,原来如此吗……” She twittering, is suddenly enlighted in a soft voice, finally understands what at this moment happened on Huai Shi is anything. 她轻声呢喃着,恍然大悟,终于明白此刻发生在槐诗身上的是什么。 Broke through the wall barrier of spirit and material, realized the transformation between iron and elementium...... 突破了灵和物质的壁障,实现了铁与源质之间的转化…… Seven years later, Huai Shi bridged over the long stress period finally, during the combustion of elementium, natural disposition sublimation, welcomed own soul. 在七年之后,槐诗终于跨过了漫长的应激期,在源质的燃烧之中,本性升华,迎来了属于自己的灵魂。 Finally that is Silver Sea, unique soul real name that gives. 那是白银之海在最后所赋予的,独一无二的灵魂真名。 ‚Hand of Encircling Restriction’! ‘圈禁之手’！