**************************************************************************************** **************************************************************************************** Very early in the morning, after opening the door sudden looking in the eyes, I do not know suddenly should say what good. 一大早,面对开门后突如其来的四目相对,我一时间不知道该说点什么好。 In the morning after waking up opens the door, suddenly discovered that one is not very ripe fellow is hung upside down in own main house gate, should say any good, how can reduce and solve the awkward atmosphere, online, is very anxious. 早上醒来打开家门后忽然发现一个不是很熟的家伙被倒吊在自己家门口,到底该说些什么好,如何能化解尴尬的气氛,在线等,挺急的。 I decided that I tries. 我决定自己试一试。 „Yo, he/she Ms. Lian, good morning, you grew, overnight, same was so unexpectedly high with me.” “哟,伊丽安女士,早上好啊,你长高了,一夜之间,竟然和我一样那么高了。” „This words what Jie?” Was hung upside down does not know how long spider young lady, unexpectedly also especially calm is speaking with me, because of the relations of spider, was used to the condition of hanging upside down probably? “此话何解？”被倒吊了不知道多久的蜘蛛小姐,竟然也格外冷静的和我说着话,大概是因为蜘蛛的关系,习惯了倒吊的状态？ „You look, your eye and my eye, were unexpectedly flush.” I put out a hand to gesticulate in each other eye, just in same level line. “你看,你的眼睛和我的眼睛,竟然齐平了。”我伸手在彼此的眼睛比划了一下,刚好处于同一水平线上。 What did this indicate? The comrades, this explained anything! 这说明了什么？同志们,这到底说明了什么呀！ This indicated that the building store height of my family house attained a designated standard, even if suddenly has Barbarian and so on giant visit, still has no need to bend the waist passing through the gate. 这说明了,我家房子的层高达标了,就算忽然有野蛮人之类的大个子来访,也用不着弯腰进门。 „......” “……” „......” “……” The spider young lady does not seem good at dealing with the cold joke greatly, four items continue relative, the atmosphere is peaceful, became more awkward. 蜘蛛小姐似乎不大擅长应对冷笑话,四目继续相对,气氛再次安静下来,变得更加尴尬了。 I think cold...... not, reduces and solves the awkward method. 我又想到了一个冷……啊不,是化解尴尬的方法。 „I do not know.” I pretend one day knowledge, today I learned appearance suddenly. “我一直不知道。”我装作一副一日一个小知识,今天我学到了的恍然样子。 „You said, I am listening.” You looked, the spider young lady's tone was obviously indifferent. “你说,吾听着。”你看,蜘蛛小姐的语气明显冷漠了。 „Originally the spider's silk, pulls out unexpectedly from the spider leg.” “原来蛛丝,竟然是从蜘蛛腿上抽出来的。” „......” “……” „......” “……” It seems like that our spider young ladies, definitely are unable to understand the human outstanding cold joke. 看来,我们的蜘蛛小姐,完全无法理解人类优秀的冷笑话。 Good, chatted slightly properly, really aggravated her is also no good. 好吧,还是聊点稍微正经的吧,真的惹火了她也没什么好处。 „That...... cough cough, he/she Ms. Lian.” “那个……咳咳,伊丽安女士。” „Said that where I want to know the limit of your humorous remarks technique.” You looked, started to taunt. “说吧,吾很想知道你的幽默话术的极限到底在哪里。”你看,都开始冷嘲热讽起来了。 Originally wants to say a proper business, but her such saying, I instead aroused the inexplicable fighting spirit, the thread of conversation changes. 本来想说点正事,但她这么一说,我反而激起了莫名的斗志,话锋一改。 „Very early in the morning, is your must netting in my family entrance?” “一大早的,您这是要在我家门口结网么？” The spider young lady is the brain hole is also elegant, actually refuted me from the accidental/surprised place: „Was not very early in the morning, starting from last night.” 蜘蛛小姐也是脑洞清奇,竟然从意外的地方反驳我:“不是一大早,是从昨晚开始。” Very good, my Wu acknowledged extraordinarily you are qualified for my supporting speaker. 很好,我吴非凡承认你有资格做我的捧哏。 „Yesterday evening exactly what happened? How were you with Lilith...... this?” The topic pulled a great-circle, eventually return right track. “昨天晚上到底发生了什么事？你和莉莉斯……这是怎么了？”话题扯了一大圈,终究还是回归正轨。 „Matter after is not complex, I saw the night of demoness king, was hung by angry her here.” “事情经过并不复杂,我见到了夜魔女王,然后被怒气冲冲的她吊在了这里。” Unexpectedly has learned the self-containment, Lilith really grew much, before trading to do is she, I open the door am not the spider young lady who sees, but was the spider young lady's head. 竟然已经学会了自我克制,莉莉斯真的是成长了不少呀,换做是以前的她,我开门见到的就不是蜘蛛小姐,而是蜘蛛小姐的头了。 I flowed off the old father's gratified tears, thinks the spider young lady still at present, coughs hastily several, appearance that pretends to be filled with righteous indignation. 我流下了老父亲的欣慰泪水,一想到蜘蛛小姐还在眼前,连忙咳嗽几声,装作义愤填膺的样子。 „Really is, how Lilith can treat my honored guest like this, he/she Ms. Lian you are waiting, I go to say with her.” “真是的,莉莉斯怎么能这样对待我的贵客呢,伊丽安女士你等着,我去和她说道说道。” Was saying turned around to return to the room not carefully, the door bang one closed, left behind a spider young lady person to continue in main house gate to sway, she was not anxious, closes both eyes, silent number/count the digit, is waiting for the number to ten times at heart opened. 说着转身就回了屋子,房门不小心砰一下关上了,留下蜘蛛小姐一个人继续在家门口晃荡晃荡,她也不急,合上双目,心里默数着数字,等数到十的时候睁开。 By her, comes out suddenly comrade. 在她旁边,就这么忽然多出来一位战友。 Together hung upside down comrade. 一起被倒吊的战友。 „In this definitely has the issue.” I am stroking gently the chin, falls into thinks deeply. “这里面绝对有问题。”我摩挲着下巴,陷入深思。 „Why the temperament of Lilith suddenly becomes so hot tempered, he/she Ms. Lian, do you take shape?” “为什么莉莉斯的脾气忽然变得如此暴躁,伊丽安女士,你有头绪吗？” I actually want to ask, was your fellow said anything, made anything, stimulated her, but artifact of greedy opposite party, tactful selected in a moment. 我其实是想问,是不是你这家伙说了什么,做了什么,刺激到了她,但是眼馋对方的神器,说话就委婉了那么点。 „These words, I also want to ask you.” “这句话,吾还想问你。” Looked at my fate, the spider young lady corners of the mouth seemed bending the flash slightly, seemed was saying, we have waited to be very long at this moment. 瞧着我的下场,蜘蛛小姐嘴角仿佛微微弯了一瞬间,好似在说,吾等这一刻已经等了很久了。 I suspected that is dazzled, the subconsciousness rubbed rubbing. 我怀疑是不是自己看花了眼,下意识揉了揉。 „But, what did you exactly have with Lilith yesterday?” “可是,昨天你和莉莉斯到底发生了什么？” „A moment ago I had explained was very clear, anything has not happened, but meets, an explanation purpose in coming, the opposite party is then in a towering rage, was hung upside down here.” “吾刚才已经解释的很清楚了,什么也没发生,只是一见面,一说明来意,然后对方就怒气冲天,接着被倒吊在了这里。” „According to truth, Lilith, although dislike contact female, but is also insufficient to turn into this.” “按道理来说,莉莉斯虽然厌恶接触女性,但也不至于会变成这样。” „I also find it strange, according to experience that I before and a night demon clan had to do, as well as my understanding of the current night demoness king, matter should very be smooth is right, which link has problems?” “吾也觉得奇怪,按照吾以前和夜魔一族打交道的经验,以及吾对现任夜魔女王的了解,事情应该会很顺利才对,到底是哪个环节出了问题？” „How long then just knew, said seems you to understand Lilith very much.” My squint. “这才刚认识多久,说的好像你很了解莉莉斯。”我斜眼。 „Her thoughts are very straightforward, is very easy to see through, only...... is probably more difficult than to be little you?” Her mood as if improved much, unexpectedly also seldom stretches out two fingers, compares a roughly half inch distance in me at present. “她的心思很直白,很容易看穿,大概只比你……难一点点？”她的心情似乎变好了不少,竟然还煞有其事的伸出两根指头,在我眼前比了个约莫半寸的距离。 At once, I cannot distinguish clearly her to praise me to damage me unexpectedly. 一时之间,我竟分不清她到底是在夸我还是在损我。 Intertwines the long time, I thought that should damage me, therefore returns the favor: „That, easily can see through he/she Ms. Lian in Lilith, why will be hung upside down here?” 纠结半晌,我觉得应该是在损我,于是还以颜色:“那么,轻易就能看穿莉莉斯的伊丽安女士,为何会被倒吊在这里呢？” „First, understood that establishes on the full information, next, the mood of opposite party not possible irrevocable, will also make the matter that some will usually not handle driven by intense mood.” “首先,了解是建立在充分的情报上面,其次,对方的情绪也不可能一成不变,在激烈的情绪驱动下也会做出一些平时不会做的事情。” The spider young lady, the vision visits me spookily: „Therefore, the essential issue is, these leaked certainly the essential information.” 蜘蛛小姐顿了顿,目光幽幽看着我:“所以,关键的问题在于,这其中一定是漏了关键的情报。” „Wait, what look you are, wants saying that I do conceal the information not to tell you intentionally?” “等等,你这是什么眼神,是想说我故意隐瞒情报没有告诉你吗？” „I hope that is not this.” “吾希望不是这样。” „In other words you thought that is this?” By being unjust for no reason, I speak am impolite: „How you did not say that is your own reason, said that anything understands a night of demon, experience is rich, is confident, actually is just your 109 th misconception!” “也就是说你觉得是这样咯？”被平白无故的冤枉,我说话也不客气了:“你怎么不说说是你自己的原因,说什么了解夜魔,经验丰富,出发的时候自信十足,其实只不过是你的第一百零九次错觉！” Correct, true experience is rich, is not your understanding a night demon clan, but is the skill that you make! 无错,真正经验丰富的,不是你对夜魔一族的了解,而是你作死的本事啊！ The spider young lady is silent, I think that she was angry, decides the eye to look, her expression somewhat is unexpectedly puzzled, unexpectedly probably in self- introspection. 蜘蛛小姐沉默下来,我以为她生气了,定眼一看,她的表情竟有些纠结,竟像是在自我反省。 Is it possible that actually she to own doing dead ability, there is a profound self-knowledge? Was this was right, saved my saliva, thinks well was your own pot. 莫非其实她对自己的作死能力,也有深刻的自知之明？是这样就对了,省了我的口水,好好想想到底是不是你自己的锅吧。 „Even so.” Some little time, spider young lady look complex opens the mouth: „Even so, I want repeatedly to confirm, left out anything.” “即便如此。”好一会儿,蜘蛛小姐神色复杂的开口:“即便如此,吾还是想再次确认一下,到底是不是漏掉了什么。” „Good.” Saw that her whole body sends out one share to the destiny to bow, but wants a final salt fish furiously very dismal imposing manner, my heart was also soft. “好吧。”看到她浑身散发着一股子想向命运低头但还是要最后咸鱼奋力一挺的悲凉气势,我的心也软了。 Is the horizon hangs upside down the person, why hangs once to hang? 同是天涯倒吊人,相吊何必曾相吊？ „You think again carefully, recalls, what common detail left out, does that night demoness king, really want to ask you to help her to fighting the practice?” “你再仔细想一想,回想一下,是不是漏掉了什么不起眼的细节,那位夜魔女王,真的是要找你帮助她进行对战练习吗？” „That also has the false, usually isn't this, what to the war practices her to ask me to make?” I blurted out, thinks, thought words speaking of this share, should consider honestly: „Actually will also ask me...... to dine, is the pure blood sucking.” “那还有假,平时都这样,不是对战练习她找我做什么？”我脱口而出,想了想,觉得话说到这个份上,应该坦诚相告:“其实还会找我……进餐,就是单纯的吸血。” „But.” I also explained hastily: „But, before last night, she has attracted, recently can go against the less than half month, therefore I can guarantee, she was absolutely impossible to ask me to last night drink again.” “但是。”我又连忙解释:“但是,在昨晚之前,她已经吸过了,最近一次都能顶小半个月,所以我敢保证,她昨晚绝对不可能再找我要喝的。” At this point, I recall a detail suddenly, although personally has not seen, but double child princess told me, should not have the false. 说到这里,我忽然回想起一个细节,虽未亲眼所见,但双子公主告诉我的,应该不会有假。 „Said, probably Lilith today's performance is a little strange, she sees her time, is her appearance...... very official?” “说起来,好像莉莉斯今天的表现是有点奇怪,她看到她的时候,她的打扮……是不是很正式？” „Un, wore the attractive skirt, the accessory that the body belt/bring sparkles clearly, melted the pale makeup probably.” Spider young lady strange visits me: „Isn't night demon always so?” “嗯,穿了好看的裙子,身上带了亮闪闪的饰品,好像还化了淡妆。”蜘蛛小姐奇怪的看着我:“夜魔不是一向如此吗？” As soon as I pat the thigh, you looked, this was the experience principle kills the person, perhaps other night demons craved in the clothing appearance very much, attracted the male right, but Lilith, her innermost feelings are not only thinking absolutely revived a night of demon clan, how is only thinking become stronger. 我一拍大腿,你看,这就是经验主义害死人了,或许其他的夜魔很热衷于穿戴打扮,借此吸引男性没错,但莉莉斯绝对不会,她的内心只想着重振夜魔一族,只想着如何变强。 „Lilith usually does not dress up, will not put on make-up with toward the body clothing accessory.” “莉莉斯平时不打扮的,更不会化妆和往身上穿戴饰品。” , Also supplements one: „Naturally, is because my family's Lilith is so lovable, does not need to put on make-up to dress up itself by what clothing and personal adornments.” 顿了顿,又补充一句:“当然了,也是因为我家的莉莉斯那么可爱,根本就不需要靠什么衣饰化妆去打扮自己。” „She usually looks for you to fighting the practice instructs the time, will dress up?” The spider young lady's emphasis is always unusual, with me not in a channel, as long as at this time was a normal person, should not praise Lilith with me, praising one to be enough well satisfied in the morning? “她平时找你对战练习指导的时候,也会这么打扮？”蜘蛛小姐的关注点总是与众不同,和我不在一个频道,这时候但凡是个正常人,不应该和我一起夸莉莉斯,夸够一个早上才心满意足么？ „Cannot.” “并不会。” „Therefore, you really determined that she makes you to meet in the evening, is usually same, to fighting the practice instructs?” “所以,你真的确定她约你晚上见面,是和平时一样,为了对战练习指导？” „What in addition can also have? All along so.” I throw out the chest proudly, a very extraordinary appearance, if were not being hung upside down. “除此之外还能有什么？一贯如此。”我傲然挺胸,一副很了不起的样子,如果不是被倒吊着的话。 „For those you, I should say has said that no omitted, should be one's turn you to think again carefully, after seeing Lilith, has the detail that anything was omitted, has not said to me.” “到是你,我该说的都已经说完了,没什么遗漏了,该轮到你再仔细想一想,见到莉莉斯以后,是不是还有什么被遗漏掉的细节,没有对我说出口。” Right, recalls carefully well, your experience rich doing dead Prime Evil , said what words, did anything, enraged Lilith. 对的,仔细好好回忆一下,你这个经验丰富的作死魔神,是不是在无意之间,说了什么话,做了什么事,激怒了莉莉斯。 Scattered the bread flour celebration like the past years in closed shrine, when crucial moment to then ignited to smoke calmly one like that your believers scattered did not call the bread flour, clearly was your bone ash. 就像当年在紧闭的神殿里撒面粉庆祝,等火候到了再点个火抽根烟冷静一下那般,你那些教徒撒的不叫面粉,分明是你的骨灰。 „The detail that your such saying, I before also really remembered had not paid attention.” A moment later, spider young lady suddenly at present one bright, the feeling answer takes shape. “你这么一说,吾到还真想起了一个之前未曾留意的细节。”片刻之后,蜘蛛小姐忽然眼前一亮,感觉答案已经呼之欲出了。 You look at you to look, is really your pot is right! Said quickly, the young devil said anything to you! 你看你看,果然是你的锅对吧！快说,小鬼子到底对你说了些什么！ „I by Lilith, saw the equally strange thing.” “吾在莉莉斯旁边,见到了一样奇怪的东西。” „What strange thing?” “什么奇怪的东西？” „A bed.” Spider young lady is recalling, while said. “一张大床。”蜘蛛小姐一边回忆着,一边说道。 „accuracy said, spreads in the mattress of ground with the cotton-wadded quilt, brand-new, scarlet color, the uprightness of shop, neat, no folds, right, on the bedhead also suspended the two same color scarlet pillow, she kneels to sit in the bedside, the clothes are neat and solemn, the clothing is magnificent and noble and pure, among the looks seems somewhat anxious anxious and anticipation, once for a while looking to here, is waiting for anything, saw is being I came, walked on the violent without delay.” “准确的说,是铺在地上的床垫和棉被,崭新的,大红颜色的,铺的方方正正,整整齐齐,没有一丝皱褶,对了,床头上还摆了两个一样颜色的大红枕头,她就跪坐在床边,衣裳整洁而端庄,穿戴华丽且高洁,神色间好似有些紧张不安和期待,时不时的望向这边,等候着什么,一眼见着是吾来了,二话不说就暴走了。” She tilts the head slightly, is looking at me with the curious look. 她微微歪头,用好奇的眼神望着我。 „This is also you with that young night demoness kings, usually to fighting the practice instructs the time matter that frequently can handle?” “这也是你和那位年幼夜魔女王之间,平日对战练习指导的时候经常会做的事情？” ... 。。。