**************************************************************************************** **************************************************************************************** „Wait, wait/etc!” “等等,等等！” Saw that this word at earliest convenience do not start, I arrive flurriedly, stops hastily, everyone stops quickly, this is not a just war! 眼看这一言不合就要开打了,我慌乱登场,连忙叫停,大家快住手哇,这并不是一场正义的战争！ „Also must wait for anything, the opposite party now only then a person, gets rid of its good opportunity.” The villains show the tortoise fist stance occasionally in a threatening manner, how to be listening to your saying, felt that who was Lesser Evil I have not made clear. “还要等什么,对方现在只有一个人,正是干掉它的好机会。”小人偶气势汹汹的摆出王八拳架势,怎么听着你这话,感觉到底谁才是魔王我已经搞不清楚了呢。 Also, the opposite party only had a person is row of first three death FLAG, you said I was not the side. 还有,对方只有一个人可是排前三的死亡FLAG,你这么说了我不是更方么。 „Do be not so hot tempered, the violence cannot solve the problem.” I use the moderate tone, comforts innermost feelings that the villain is moving restlessly occasionally. “不要那么暴躁,暴力并不能解决问题。”我用缓和的语气,安抚着小人偶躁动的内心。 „But can solve the person who has problems.” “但能解决出问题的人。” Good that these words saying, but I felt the person who has been doing the matter is you! 这句话说的好,但我觉得一直在搞事的人就是你！ Wrong non is Princess loli’s dreamland, her domain she takes responsibility, light/only this saying, I take 25 young at the scene, jumped instead joins the Lesser Evil army. 错非这是萝莉公主的梦境,她的地盘她做主,光这话,我当场就要二五仔,跳反加入魔王军了。 „Can kill like this? He is your friends from childhood is right, doesn't have a sentiment of faint trace?” “非得这样打打杀杀吗？他是你的青梅竹马对吧,难道就没有一丝丝的感情吗？” Saw that the villain did not speak the truth occasionally, I rushed to signal with the eyes to Princess loli, although same person right, but the main body was quite shy, was not good at rejecting the person. 眼看小人偶不讲道理了,我赶忙向萝莉公主使眼色,虽说是同一个人没错,但本体到底比较害羞,不擅长拒绝人。 „But...... this...... but......” Princess loli is in a dilemma, has a look at me, has a look at the villain partner again, has a look at Lesser Evil, lowers the head simply, turns own notebook, writes above at the scene, suddenly silent is only left over the rustling sound of pen tip. “可是……这个……但是……”萝莉公主左右为难起来,看看我,再看看小人偶,又看看魔王,干脆低下头,翻起了自家的笔记本,在上面当场挥笔,一时间寂静的只剩下笔尖的沙沙声。 „Ok.” In a minute, she is thin, if the mosquito recited exuded one to finish up to handle the relieved sigh that. “好了。”片刻,她细若蚊吟的发出一声完事搞定的安心叹息。 Solved the problem? Or solved villain occasionally Lesser Evil? In brief the dry/does attractiveness, I make a fist wield, felt that Princess loli can communicate. 解决问题了么？或者说解决了小人偶还是魔王？总而言之干的漂亮,我握拳一挥,感觉萝莉公主还是可以沟通的。 „Now not.” “现在不是了。” „Ha?” The fist wields the midair, stiffened. “哈？”拳头挥到半空,僵住了。 „Now was not friends from childhood.” “现在不是青梅竹马了。” „Does the wool!” “搞毛啊！” „Changing is the twin brothers of Mr. Tal Rasha.” “改成了是塔拉夏先生的孪生兄弟。” „My stupid younger brother, do you also want to be misled by this woman, betray my Elder Brother?” “我愚蠢的弟弟哦,你也要被这个女人蛊惑,背叛我这个哥哥吗？” The one side puts on the obsolete cape look not to exhibit unlucky poor sense of direction feeble-minded mental handicap Lesser Evil that a extraordinary appearance face under punches averagely wonderfully, in an instant exhibited various JOJO bodies to me. 一旁穿着过时斗篷相貌平平无奇摆出了不起的样子一脸欠揍的倒霉路痴低能智障魔王,转眼就对我摆出了各种JOJO体。 It is not, how I cannot be an Elder Brother, non- appropriate younger brother? 不是,怎么我就不能是哥哥了,非得当弟弟？ It is not, trough not here, your it meow coordinate wool! Is the dignity a little good, is Lesser Evil or the tool crowd develops?! 不是,槽点不在这里,你它喵的配合个毛啊！有点尊严好不好,到底是魔王还是工具人群演？！ It is not, your JOJO wool, your favorite wool, your banana idiot Lesser Evil! 不是,你JOJO个毛啊,你得意个毛啊,你这香蕉白痴魔王！ It is not, probably scolded the wrong person, probably is scolding me. 不是,好像骂错人了,好像在骂我自己。 It is not, my brain is quite chaotic! 不是,我脑子好乱啊！ Is ruddy facing the powder cheek, a face satisfies, as if completed a Princess loli of extraordinary masterpiece, I went full steam ahead, the countless words, gathered five characters entirely. 面对粉颊红润,一脸满足,仿佛完成了一本了不起的巨作的萝莉公主,我内心万马奔腾,千言万语,统统汇聚成了五个字。 mother, why! 尼玛的,为什么！ Why always persecutes me, always in view of me, didn't have others to share the firepower besides me? 为什么老是迫害我,老是针对我,难道除了我之外就没有其他人可以分担火力了吗？ Really did not have probably. 哦,好像还真没有。 Thought through this point, I felt better some...... to be strange the bastard! 想通了这一点,我内心好过了一些……才怪呢混蛋！ I must protest! 我要抗议！ „Wait, you break the rules, how can change the setting temporarily!” “等等,你这是犯规,怎么能临时更改设定！” „...... Does not calculate the temporary revision, had the fuzzy idea at heart early.” Princess loli bashful answered, raises this fine masterpiece, she was even more fluent, spirited. “也……也不算临时修改,心里早有了模糊的想法。”萝莉公主羞答答的解释道,一提起这本传世巨作,她越发流利,神气。 „You looked, protagonist had changed, right.” “你看,主角都已经改了,对吧。” „Moreover you also look like very much.” “而且你俩还很像。” The villains supplement one occasionally, you shut up to me, whose pot is this?! 小人偶追加一句,你给我闭嘴,这到底是谁的锅？！ Endured the one breath, I do best to convince: „Truth I understand, but can protagonist carry out the relations that the point has ties of kinship with villain Super Unique to be good?” 忍了一口气,我苦口婆心:“道理我懂,但是主角就非得和反派BOSS搞点沾亲带故的关系才行么？” „This also to build the contradiction, discusses the human nature, deepens the subject, faces own blood elder brother is the Lesser Evil fact, protagonist is chooses the kinship or the justness, wú stunned stunned stunned, isn't this very interesting?” “这也为了营造矛盾,探讨人性,深化主题,面对自己的亲哥哥是魔王的事实,主角到底是选择亲情还是正义,唔呒呒呒,这不是很有趣吗？” Ended, I teach all her the way, she studied for the purpose of application on me. 完了,我一路上教她的,她学以致用到我身上了。 At this moment, I wish one could Segen rocket on my chrysanthemum, directly soars to go toward Sun, you said that my mouth inexpensive anything, throws the street to teach to sprout/moe newly, was equal to that the monkey pulls the puppy, walks in liger prairie in groups, on two faces wrote all over small and weakly. 此时此刻,我恨不得在自己菊花上塞根火箭,一路向着太阳直奔而去,你说我嘴贱个什么,扑街教萌新,等于猴子牵小狗,走在狮虎成群的大草原,两张脸上写满了弱小。 Saw that Princess loli immersed in oneself writing world, the villain sharpened the knife occasionally, shakes the fist to continue, must throw the stance that and Lesser Evil perished together momentarily, I gave up the ponder...... not, gave up the communication. 眼看萝莉公主沉浸在了自己的写作世界中,小人偶则是磨刀霍霍,挥拳不止,一副随时要扑上去和魔王同归于尽的架势,我放弃了思考……啊不,是放弃了沟通。 Then to Lesser Evil. 转而面向魔王。 „That what...... the elder brother, we have the words saying that don't kill the line not?” “那啥……哥,咱们有话好说,别打打杀杀行不？” „So long as you do not snatch my banana.” Still is suspending Lesser Evil of JOJO posture, visits us with the condescending despising look. “只要你们不抢我的香蕉。”还在摆着JOJO姿势的魔王,用居高临下的藐视眼神看着我们。 Does not know why wants to snatch his banana suddenly. 不知为何忽然想抢他的香蕉了。 „Our goals are here buried treasure, the banana does not want, does not conflict.” I do not know why oneself collapse a mother language suddenly, thought probably this script had oratorio that taste. “我们的目标是这里的宝藏,香蕉的不要,不冲突。”我也不知道自己为什么就忽然崩出一句太君语,大概是觉得这剧本有神剧那味儿了。 „Here buried treasure only has the banana, my stupid younger brother, you really must oppose with me.” Saying, a Lesser Evil black hair is bleaching, the cape bang a ballooning gets up, flap flap dances in the air, his right hand lifts in the top of the head, is grasping one high...... “这里的宝藏只有香蕉,我愚蠢的弟弟呀,你果然是要和我作对。”这么说着,魔王一头黑发变白,斗篷砰的一下鼓胀起来,猎猎飞舞,他的右手举于头顶,高高握着一把…… Salt fish that one five chi (0.33 m) are still twitching occasionally strangely. 一条五尺长偶尔还在诡异抽搐的咸鱼。 „I could not develop!” My reckless then cries to pour in the Tiya bosom, rubs, rubs. “我演不下去了！”我不顾一切的回头哭倒在蒂亚怀里,蹭蹭,蹭蹭。 „Clever, clever, does not cry.” “乖,乖,凡凡不哭。” „When this is a head!” Rubs, rubs. “这到底什么时候才是个头啊！”蹭蹭,蹭蹭。 „I think that perhaps............ should............ possible...... hope...... to finish probably quickly.” “我想……大概……应该……或许……可能……但愿……很快就会结束。” „Good , to continue to work.” The energy trough filled, throws the tile, it came back! “好,继续干活吧。”能量槽满了,抛瓦,它回来了！ Has turned head, discovered Princess loli and a villain occasionally face shocking visits me. 回过头,发现萝莉公主和小人偶正一脸震惊的看着我。 „Shock, the odd person monkey mister is actually talking with the air!” “震惊,怪人猴子先生竟然在和空气对话！” „Anna, Mr. Tal Rasha he...... already...... already......” “安娜,塔拉夏先生他……是不是已经……已经……” „Athena, you guess right, the monkey mister in kinship and under just suffering, energy is confused, single more than 40 years of he, fantasized unexpectedly oneself have married!” “雅典娜,你猜的没错,猴子先生在亲情和正义的折磨下,已经精神错乱,单身四十多年的他,竟然幻想自己已经结婚了！” „Object who he talked a moment ago......” “难道说他刚才对话的对象……” „Right, is in his mind fantasizes, wife who does not have!” “没错,就是他脑海中幻想出来的,不存在的妻子！” 【It is not does not exist, I was wife, Nana you am too much too.】 【才不是不存在呢,我就是凡凡的妻子,娜娜你有点太过分了哦。】 The Tiya forehead blue vein pulls out, unprecedented flushed the 30,000 years ago best friends to shake the fist, the opposite party could not only see pitifully and that's the end. 蒂亚额头青筋一抽一抽,破天荒的冲三万年前的闺蜜晃了晃拳头,只可惜对方看不见就是了。 „Good, when I was energy was confusedly good, we said the proper business.” I pat the palm to break, am all smiles, has not minded slandering of opposite party slightly. “好了好了,就当我是精神错乱好了,咱们说正事。”我拍着手掌打断,笑容满面,丝毫没有介意对方的中伤。 Why must say, I can only tell you, cleanser that oneself produce, the effect is that good. 要说为什么,我只能告诉你,自家自产的洗面奶,功效就是那么好。 The words of proper business...... 正事的话…… Has looked back Lesser Evil, he is also maintaining the powerful posture that lifts up high the salt fish, the mark silk has not moved, but the cape special effect does not have, dried out lets fall, seems like by husky who the torrential downpour drips wet, the hands and feet is only shivered slightly. 回过头来看魔王,他还保持着高举咸鱼的威风凛凛姿势,纹丝未动,只是斗篷特效已经没了,干瘪瘪的垂落下来,看起来像只被倾盆大雨淋湿的哈士奇,手脚微微颤抖。 In that urging has a suffering pitiful small look, like saying that —— in that side do not say some pointless off topic, you noticed me a bit faster, had a look at the salt fish on my hand a bit faster, said a bit faster anything, I lifted tired. 那催促中带着点委屈的可怜小眼神,就像在说——别在那边说些没意义的题外话了,你们快点注意到我呀,快点看看我手上的咸鱼呀,快点说点什么呀,我都举累了。 Detected that my vision, he rushes to put down the salt fish, the back passed away to rub the rubbing the hands wrist, then un coughed to return, spirited raising the head. 察觉到我的目光,他赶忙将咸鱼放下,背过身去揉了揉手腕,然后嗯咳一声回过来,神气的抬起头。 „What kind of, feared? Now draws back also with enough time.” “怎么样,怕了吗？现在退下还来得及。” „Not is right, is not you leaves behind the caution to make us come?” I give up again and again , indicating this lines and script setting not to. “不对不对,不是你留下警示让我们一路过来的吗？”我连连罢手,表示这台词和剧本设定没对上。 „Also is, is I makes you come, why is this?” Lesser Evil is a little ignorant, thinks, probably finally recalled anything, JOJO got up again. “也是嗷,是我让你们来的,这到底是为什么呢？”魔王有点懵,想了想,好像终于回想起了什么,再次JOJO起来。 „My stupid......” “我愚蠢的……” „Made a long story short.” “长话短说。” „Good, looks in you are in my younger brother's share, I planned that divides a banana to give you.” “好吧,看在你是我的弟弟的份上,我打算分一点香蕉给你。” „Really?!” “真的？！” „But you must first kill that little girl.” “但是你得先杀了那个小女孩。” The plot became the hard core to get up all of a sudden, I a little did not adapt, thinks, appeared at heart a steelyard, here of scale was the bright yellow attractive banana, that side was Princess loli and villain partner. 剧情一下子变得硬核起来了,我有点不适应啊,想了想,心里浮现一杆秤,秤的这边是黄澄澄的诱人香蕉,那边是萝莉公主和小人偶。 „Athena, do not blame me, must blame, blames the banana.” I jumped that side Lesser Evil decisively, turning head occasionally was bright the sword to Princess loli and person. “雅典娜,不要怪我,要怪,就怪香蕉吧。”我果断跳到了魔王那边,回过头来对着萝莉公主和人偶亮剑。 „What to do, in the most crucial time, to have the battle efficiency monkey mister to be seduced by the banana only, revolting.” Villain occasionally anxious running around in circles. “怎么办,在最关键的时刻,唯一有战斗力的猴子先生受到香蕉的诱惑,叛变了。”小人偶急的团团转。 „Anna do not fluster, this is the strategy of Mr. Tal Rasha, he surrenders to the enemy insincerely, actually wants to look for the opportunity to assassinate Lesser Evil, but was a pity very much, in this most crucial time, must succeed shortly, he suddenly painful covering heart, discovered oneself have incurable......” “安娜别慌,这是塔拉夏先生的计策,他假意投敌,其实是想寻找机会刺杀魔王,但是很可惜,在这个最关键的时刻,眼看就要成功了,他忽然痛苦的捂住心脏,发现自己身患不治……” „Wait, you think that I will receive the seduction of trivial banana? The stupid Elder Brother, I am playing jokes upon you!” I am speaking the complacent words, rebound Princess loli who while has tears streaming down the face. “等等,你以为我会受到区区香蕉的诱惑吗？愚蠢的哥哥哟,我只是在戏耍你！”我一边说着得意洋洋的话,一边泪流满面的跳回萝莉公主这边。 „Scoundrel, gives your banana you not to want, such being the case, you give this king dead!” Lesser Evil got angry, holds up the salt fish again high. “混账,给你香蕉你不要,既然如此,你们都给本王去死吧！”魔王怒了,再次把咸鱼高高举起。 „Wait, the banana I can not want, you let off Athena, she is also only a child!” “等等,香蕉我可以不要,你放过雅典娜吧,她还只是个孩子！” „You do not want the banana, what do you come to here to make?” “你不要香蕉,那你来这里做什么？” Right? 对呀？ I rise the brain a little gets muddled, does not want the banana, what do I come to here to make? Looks for own twin mental handicap banana Elder Brother Lesser Evil stubble especially? 我涨乎乎的脑子有点发蒙,不要香蕉,我来这里做什么？特地来找自己的双胞胎智障香蕉魔王哥哥的茬么？ „We are look for the buried treasure!” The villains are angry occasionally. “我们是来找宝藏的！”小人偶大怒。 „You are really covet my banana!” Lesser Evil is angry. “你们果然是来觊觎我的香蕉！”魔王大怒。 „Come, who feared who!” “来啊,谁怕谁！” „Bold, looked that this king salt fish hacks to death you!” “大胆,看本王一咸鱼砍死你们！” „Wait, wait/etc!” “等等,等等！” Saw that two people fight callus, the forehead quick post, I stopped together again, after both sides stop, the speech, has not first been turning head to rub anxiously, then rubs. 眼看着两人斗鸡眼似的,额头都快贴一起了,我再次喊停,等双方停下来后,先不急着说话,回过头蹭蹭,再蹭蹭。 Worthily is you, the Elder Brother in my fate, can let my banana consumption such rapidness unexpectedly. 不愧是你,我宿命中的哥哥,竟然能让我的香蕉消耗如此之快。 The supplement of energy, making my brain gradually sober, realized that the issue is. 能量的补充,让我大脑逐渐清醒,意识到问题所在。 „I just said that if the buried treasure is the banana, then entirely turns over to you, other turn over to me, how?” “我刚刚说了,如果宝藏是香蕉,那么全部归你,其他归我,如何？” „That is not good.” Lesser Evil thinks, swings begins. “那也不行。”魔王想了想,摇起了头。 „Why!” Aren't you one only love banana Lesser Evil of banana? You betrayed the banana god! I must kill your entire family!!! “为什么！”你不是一个只爱香蕉的香蕉魔王吗？你背叛了香蕉神教！我要杀了你全家！！！ „Here was I first found, originally all buried treasures turned over to me, why why must apportion you, a wee bit did not give.” Lesser Evil gave a hand signal of small ground and soaked black beans, obviously is mental handicap , was very astute at this time, was really looks like...... “这里是我先找到的,本来所有的宝藏就都归我,凭什么为什么要分给你们,一丁点都不给。”魔王比了一个小钱钱的手势,明明是个智障只有这种时候特别精明,真是像极了…… The detail does not need to care. 细节不必在意。 „Such being the case, do you leave behind the caution to make us come in especially for what?” “既然如此,你特地留下警示让我们进来是为了什么？” „Said is also.” Lesser Evil mystified scratching the head, lost to the pulpy script setting. “说的也是。”魔王一脸迷惑的挠挠头,到底还是输给了稀烂的剧本设定。 „Came, that many apportions you to be little.” “来都来了,那就多少分给你们一点点吧。” „Minute of how many?” „10%.” „Were too few.” „Most 28.” „Again, again.” „Cannot be many.” „37 how, your three I seven!” „Thought arriving beautiful, most can only my three you seven!” „Like this, we draw back respectively one step, 46, your four I six.” „Cannot draw back again, my four you six, do not accept roll to me!” „Looks in the brothers friendship, gives, 55!” „You reached out for a yard after taking an inch, withdrew the words, can only 28, my two you eight!” „Do not go too far, at least divides me 10%, otherwise do not blame me to get angry!” „Impudent and shameless, actually also the delusion takes 10%, I said 28 is 28, you gave up any idea of that takes again tiny bit!” „Really can that the unfeeling?” „Said again the brothers have not resulted in do!” „Good, this is you compels my!” „You think that you can be my opponent?!” “分多少？”“10%。”“太少了。”“最多二八分。”“再给点,再给点。”“不能再多了。”“三七如何,你三我七！”“想的到美,最多只能我三你七！”“这样,我们各退一步,四六分,你四我六。”“不能再退了,我四你六,不接受就给我滚！”“看在兄弟情义上,多给一点,五五分！”“你太得寸进尺了,收回刚才的话,只能二八分,我二你八！”“你不要太过分了,至少分我10%,否则别怪我翻脸！”“厚颜无耻,竟然还妄想拿10%,我说了二八分就是二八分,你休想再多拿一分一毫！”“真要那么绝情？”“再说下去兄弟都没得做！”“好,这是你逼我的！”“你以为你会是我的对手吗？！” A face that Athena and villain listen to occasionally compels ignorant, the brain also gradually mathematical emperor, is it possible that are really these two divide the booty at the serious discussion? 雅典娜和小人偶听的一脸懵逼,脑子也逐渐数学帝化,莫非,这两人真是在正经八百的讨论分赃？ Must resort to arms shortly the spear/gun, Athena gets a sudden inspiration, blurted out. 眼看就要动刀动枪了,雅典娜灵机一动,脱口而出。 „Buried treasure, only then, how two people divide are impossible to divide equally, or the banana turns over to you, does the buried treasure turn over to me?” “宝藏只有一个,两人怎么分也不可能均分,要不香蕉归你们,宝藏归我？” „This......” “这……” I think carefully, probably indeed is means that has a look at my mental handicap Elder Brother, he reveals the brilliant look, kept a serious look pondered three seconds, nod finally. 我仔细想了想,好像的确是个办法,看看我那智障的哥哥,他露出睿智的眼神,表情严肃的思考了三秒钟,最终点了点头。 „Mr. Lu Xun has said that does not contract widowed contracts unevenly, really so.” “鲁迅先生说过,不患寡而患不均,果然如此。” „As the matter stands was fair, we become reconciled.” “这样一来就公平了,我们和好吧。” „Elder Brother!” “哥哥！” „Younger brother!” “弟弟！” „I take the buried treasure, in this place, do not take a walk.” “我去拿宝藏,你就在此地,不要走动。” Like this urged my one, he received the salt fish, the step limped before front door, there is a gully together, must jump and crawls, his cautious first extended the foot, leapt gently, vanishes in the ditch, after a while, ten fingers found out in another side, the hands and feet used, after trying dozens times, finally difficultly climbed, at this time, I saw his back. 这样叮嘱我一句,他收好咸鱼,步伐蹒跚的到了大门前,有一道沟壑,须跳下去又爬上来,他小心翼翼的先将脚伸下去,轻轻一跃,消失在沟里,过了一会,十根指头在另外一边探出,手脚并用,尝试了几十次后,终于艰难的攀了上来,这时候,我看见他的背影。 —— pā chirp, pounding to fly by the clock pendulum iron ball of dropping from the clouds. ——啪叽一声,被从天而降的钟摆铁球给砸飞了。 „Before never expected that gate, has the last trap, was really dangerous.” Princess loli pats the palm, suddenly faints from fear scratched among the volumes the cold sweat. “没想到门前还有最后一道陷阱,真是太危险了。”萝莉公主一拍手心,恍然惊觉的擦了擦额间冷汗。 „He is not good, the trap that front steps on are too many, is critically injured, is only left over the one breath, must succeed shortly, poured before the goal line.” “他已经不行了,前面踩的陷阱太多,伤势严重,只剩下一口气,眼看就要成功了,还是倒在了终点线前。” The villains go forward occasionally, dexterous has leapt, only then one meter wide gully, must hit the mosaic to be able examining Lesser Evil to search the aura to the ground, then toward our regrettable shaking the head, holds the salt fish round trip of purple blanch to walk, stopper altogether to my cape on, after smelling own small palm, shuts out makes an effort to scrub. 小人偶上前,轻巧的跃过只有一米多宽的沟壑,冲地上已经要打马赛克才能过审的魔王探了探气息,而后朝我们遗憾的摇了摇头,抱着乌青发白的咸鱼往回走,一股脑的塞到我斗篷上,闻了闻自己的小掌心后,嫌弃的用力搓洗起来。 „, The Lesser Evil relic, takes care.” “喏,魔王的遗物,保管好。” Who wants, stank to high heaven! 谁要啊,臭死了！ ... 。。。