RLY :: Volume #11

#72: Absurd comedy

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Pure writing online reading home station domain name cell phone synchronization reading please visit m 纯文字在线阅读本站域名手机同步阅读请访问m That cow is dragging the iron plough-share, only runs out of one li (0.5 km) many, just crossed a gentle slope, sees the front to welcome one group of people with great fanfare. This group of people from the bridegroom to the trumpeter, everyone scarlet, the sedan chair are glowing red, on horse bound the red silk. 那牛拖着铁犁铧,只冲出一里多地,刚刚翻过一个缓坡,就见前方吹吹打打地迎过来一群人。这群人从新郎倌到吹鼓手,人人一身大红,轿子是红彤彤的,就连马身上都裹了红绸。 Sees that big bull to tow the plow to come, these obtain „to accompany the bride to her new home person who” open/stretch Yutong incites immediately to scream: „Mad bull! The mad bull flushed, run!” 一见那头大牯牛拖着犁过来,这些早就得到张雨桐授意的“送亲人”立即尖叫起来:“疯牛啊！有一头疯牛冲过来了,快跑啊！” The bridegrooms dial the horse then to walk, the trumpeters abandon the decorated sedan chair to follow including the carrying a sedan chair chair bearer, run away together to the west. Raising the stream ground is from south to north the strip division territory, the west side belongs to Yu Family, the east side is Zhang, walks crosswise, soon can enter the Yu Family territory. 新郎倌拨马便走,众吹鼓手包括抬轿子的轿夫扔下花轿紧随其后,一起向西逃去。提溪地面是从南到北条状分割的领地,西侧属于于家,东侧属于张家,横向一走,用不了多久就能进入于家的领地。 At this time Taiyang (Sun) just raised, must arrive in sunset Xishan is finished, so long as this farm cattle have enough strength, will assign the big piece Yu Family territory, then, Zhang not only solved own encirclement, will also make Yu Family steal a chicken inadequate counter- eclipse meter/rice. 此时太阳刚刚升起,要到日落西山才算结束,这头耕牛只要有足够的力气,将划走大片于家领地,如此一来,张家不但解了自己的围,还会让于家偷鸡不成反蚀一把米。 However, that big bull, although sees front one group of people to run away in a panic, actually only stopped, lowers the head , to continue to tow iron plow taking a step stand forth, has not paid attention to the red clothes person who these escape. 不过,那头大牯牛虽见前方一群人仓惶逃去,却只停顿了一下,就低下头,继续拖着铁犁迈步向前走去,并未理会这些逃开的红衣人。 Actually, the cow is the color blindness, will not have what special feeling to the red. The person is actually special to the red feeling, matador with scarlet cloth, to work up the audience mood, rather than bullfight. Bullfight natural disposition combative, before entering the stage, was closed by long time in the cowshed, the personality naturally becomes hot tempered anxious, is aggressive. 其实,牛是色盲,并不会对红色有什么特别的感觉。倒是人对红色感觉特殊,斗牛士用红布,是为了调动观众情绪,而非斗牛。斗牛本性好斗,出场之前又被长时间关在牛栏里,性情自然变得暴躁不安,富有攻击性。 When it enters the stage , the sound stimulation of some entire audience mountainous cry tsunami, the matador carries a arrange/cloth to wield in front of it at this time again, will enrage the bullfight, thus to launches the attack to the matador. 等它出场时,又有全场观众山呼海啸的声音刺激,此时再有一位斗牛士拎着块布在它前边挥来挥去的,就会激怒斗牛,从而冲上来向斗牛士发起攻击。 open/stretch Yutong previously to confirm the view of Western missionary, after choosing bull, carried a scarlet cloth to probe specially. This bull was pulled the mansions of wealthy families of Zhang from the mountains and plains village, originally the feeling is strange and anxious, says goodbye him continually to provoke, the nature launches the attack to him. 张雨桐先前为了验证西洋传教士的说法,在选好公牛后,特意拎了块红布去试探过。这头牯牛被人从山野乡村牵到张家的深宅大院,本来就感觉陌生和不安,再见他不断挑衅,自然向他发起攻击。 open/stretch Yutong therefore takes seriously, only said that the cow is extremely really repugnant about the red, has not thought that tests with other cloths. This moment that big bull is wrapping the yoke, thinks that human wanted it to plant crops, moreover front these people saw it to escape, without inexpensive stomped before it, brandishes the cloth piece provocation, the wish that it attacked is not strong. 张雨桐因此当了真,只道牛真的对红色极其反感,也不曾想到用其它的布来测试一下。此刻那头大牯牛套着轭,就以为人类又要它耕地了,而且前边那些人一见它就逃开了,没有在它面前贱兮兮地蹦来蹦去,挥舞布片儿挑衅,它攻击的意愿就不强烈了。 In route that simultaneously in it must walk, the person in Ge Duolao tribe has used their special secret recipes to compound a liquid to sprinkle. This is the mixture of a plant juice and animal body fluid. Smell ox class of that plant sending out will be very sensitive, is one vegetation flavor that they are interested in very much, but that animal body fluid extracts from the cow, can stimulate the bull. 同时在它本来要行走的路线上,格哚佬部落里的人已经用他们的独门秘方配制了一种液体洒下去。这是一种植物汁液和动物体液的混合体。那种植物散发的气味牛类会很敏感,是它们很感兴趣的一种草木味道,而那动物体液则是从牝牛身上提取的,可以激发公牛的。 The attraction of this different/two kinds smell to bull must be much more than these wear red clothes, screamed common people who escape, therefore the big bull continues to go north without hesitation. 这两样气味对公牛的吸引力要远远大于那些穿着红衣服,一路尖叫逃开的百姓,于是大牯牛毫不犹豫地继续继续北上。 „Oh no! We ran away quickly! If we cannot direct this bull, certainly will be punished by the young master.” “糟糕！是不是我们逃得太快了！如果我们引不开这头牯牛,一定会受少爷惩罚的。” The man who that plays the role of the bridegroom sees the bull is not led away by them, the hurried circle horse flushed, to while shouted: „Rescues my wife quickly! Rescues my wife quickly.” 那位扮新郎倌的汉子见牯牛没有被他们引开,急忙圈马又冲了回来,一边冲一边喊:“快救我的娘子！快救我的娘子。” What a pity when they clash, that bull has towed the iron plow to walk from the decorated sedan chair, Ye Xiaotian and writing proud, Ge Duolao and the others are progressing to follow behind the bull, they are how good under glare of the public eye intercept the bull to continue to provoke. 可惜当他们冲回来时,那头牯牛已经拖着铁犁从花轿旁边走了过去,叶小天、文傲、格哚佬等人正策马跟在牯牛后面,他们怎好在众目睽睽之下截住牯牛继续挑衅。 open/stretch Yi in short supply said/tunnel: „How can like this! Why doesn't that cow pursue them?” 张绎紧张地道:“怎么会这样！那头牛为什么不去追他们？” open/stretch Yutong said at a loss: „, I will not have tried, is it possible that is they runs away is too quick?” 张雨桐茫然道:“不会啊,我试过的,莫非是他们逃的太快？” open/stretch Yiji said: „This cow has proceeded, gets down, delimits all will be the lands of Zhang. Lets the front person preparation quickly, in any event, must be close to enrage this bull again, if might as well uses the firecracker to frighten off it inadequately!” 张绎急道:“这头牛一直往前走,这么下去,划走的将全是咱们张家的土地了。快让前边的人准备,无论如何,一定要接近了再激怒这头牯牛,如果还是不成不妨动用炮仗吓走它！” open/stretch Yutong hurries to call a guard, told several hastily, the guard then vertical horse dashed, he captured a big circle, circled in front of the people. That farm cattle not possibly walk again quickly quick the speeding horse, he has enough time to inform the second group of troops to be ready. 张雨桐赶紧唤过一名侍卫,匆匆吩咐几句,那侍卫便纵马飞奔起来,他兜了一个大圈子,绕到了众人前面。那耕牛走得再快也不可能快过奔马,他有足够的时间去通知第二路人马做好准备。 That bull is dragging the iron pear vanguard, from time to time the plow is buried sharp, cuts together the mud wave, because from time to time no one holds the pear, by Turkish and Chinese one stone one, was then sprung the ground, delimits together the gutter on the ground. Several knight following bulls, whip often crack in airborne, sometimes will also pull out in the cow conducts the back. 那牯牛拖着铁梨前行,时而犁尖入土,划开一道泥浪,时而因为无人扶梨,被土中一块石头一顶,便弹出地面,在地上划出一道浅沟。几名骑士跟着牯牛,鞭子不时炸响在空中,有时也会抽在牛背上。 Ye Xiaotian, Ge Duolao and the others were tagging along after behind that several knights, Uncle open/stretch who Yi Ge Duolao then has a look in the whisper the nephew, sneers saying: „Here is desolate and uninhabited, going to bride's home to escort her to the wedding team where comes, deciding however is the person of Zhang plays tricks,” 叶小天、格哚佬等人尾随着那几名骑士后面,格哚佬回头看看正在耳语的张绎叔侄,冷笑道:“这儿荒无人烟,哪来的迎亲队伍,定然是张家的人捣鬼,” writing Aodao: „Good! Tian Di (Heaven and Earth) about, but the myriad things are popular, the person subscribes its ritual by the dusk marriage. When gets married bows to Heaven and Earth, should in deciding when the dusk, Yin-Yang alternately, where has to run to meet new wife very early in the morning, they decide have what schemes and tricks!” 文傲道:“不错！天地合而万物兴,人以昏姻订其礼。成亲拜堂之时,应在定在黄昏之际,阴阳交替之时,哪有一大早就跑出来接新娘子的,他们定是有什么阴谋诡计！” Headman in is young, horse-riding actually also good, he rides on a four -and-a-half-year-old deep red pony, with clear virgin sound said: „, Screamed with great fanfare how many can lead away the bull? Hee hee, they really quite stupid!” 于土司年纪虽小,马术却也不错,他骑在一匹四岁半的枣红色小马身上,用清脆的童音道:“可是吹吹打打、尖叫几声就能引开牯牛么？嘻嘻,他们真的好蠢！” open/stretch Yutong the guard fast horse rushes to front, seeks one team lazily in the going to bride's home to escort her to the wedding team of roadside, the order said hastily: „The front person failed, you move forward to meet somebody quickly, prepares the firecracker, if cannot lead away it, selects the firecracker to frighten off it, if again is defeated, the young master must punish!” 张雨桐的侍卫快马赶到前边,寻到一队正懒洋洋地等在路边的迎亲队伍,匆匆命令道:“前边的人失败了,你们快迎上去,把炮仗准备好,如果不能引开它,就点炮仗把它吓走,再若失败,少爷必会严惩！” That played the role of the new wife country girl to listen to his saying, hurried to sneak in the sedan chair, the man who played the role of the bridegroom is throwing over the red silk, the chest front was a big safflower, asked: „Where we toward welcomed, did that cow rush to here to come?” 那扮新娘子的村姑听他这一说,慌忙钻进轿子,扮新郎倌的男人披着红绸,胸前系一朵大红花,愣愣地问道:“咱们往哪儿迎,那牛奔我们这儿来了么？” The guards stare saying: „How do I know? You welcomed toward south, stops up that cow!” 侍卫瞪眼道:“我怎么知道？你们往南迎,去堵那头牛！” One group of people are helpless, has to lift the sedan chair urgently urgently to welcome to south, cannot attend to all the way with great fanfare, as if carries off a girl to be one's wife, runs that to call completely routed, entire team scattered in disorder looking awful, the decorated sedan chair fell on rear, the bridegroom actually flushed in the forefront, the hand hits the cool awning, looked around. 一群人无奈,只好抬起轿子急急向南迎去,一路上也顾不得吹吹打打,仿佛抢亲似的,跑得那叫一个落花流水,整个队伍散乱的不成样子,花轿落在了最后面,新郎倌却冲在最前面,手打凉篷,东张西望。 „In there! In there!” Saw from afar a big bull drags the iron plow to walk, back the person who follows many to ride a horse, the bridegroom is also overjoyed, knows that found the person, immediately called jubilantly. “在那里！在那里！”远远看到一头大牯牛拖着铁犁走来,后边还跟着好多骑马的人,新郎倌大喜过望,知道找到了正主儿,马上兴高采烈地叫起来。 The going to bride's home to escort her to the wedding team welcomed to that big bull, they ran pantingly, suddenly remembered new wife also to lag behind, drops out new wife to go to the truncation bull, this rather was also too obvious, has to halt, back loud greeting chair bearer. 迎亲队伍向那头大牯牛迎去,他们气喘吁吁地跑了一阵,忽然想起新娘子还落在后面,抛下新娘子去截牯牛,这也未免太明显了,只好站住,大声招呼后边的轿夫。 That several chair bearers carry the sedan chair to run streaming with sweat, put out the vigor that nurses to go all out to dash about wildly, jolt new wife to run upon to fall, left Yaoyou inside the sedan chair to suspend, stomach inside overwhelming general, the complexion is very ugly. 那几个轿夫扛着轿子跑得汗流浃背,一个个拿出吃奶的劲儿拼命狂奔,颠得新娘子在轿子里边撞上摔下、左摇右摆,胃里头翻江倒海一般,脸色十分难看。 The sedan chair catches up finally, that bull also towed the plow to approach. Although good endurance strong in horse, but the speed is not fast, let alone it is also towing the plow. Like from the beginning is not quick at the speed. 轿子终于追上,那头牯牛也拖着犁走近了。牛的耐力虽强于马,但速度不快,何况它还拖着犁。是以速度已不像一开始那么快。 „In a big hurry quickly! Stands quickly the formation. The trumpeters, blow «Going to bride's home to escort her to the wedding Tune», firecracker! Firecracker! The preparation selects!” The bridegrooms are thrown into confusion to direct, here kind of trumpet sound just resounded, creates a cheerful atmosphere, that cow has approached. “快快快！快站好队形。吹鼓手,吹《迎亲曲》,炮仗！炮仗！准备点！”新郎倌手忙脚乱地指挥起来,这边锁呐声刚刚响起,营造出一种喜庆气氛,那头牛已经走近了。 „This is the farm cattle of which family/home, how to rush to here to come, got out of the way!” The bridegrooms move forward to meet somebody on own initiative, reprimanded to drink pretentiously, nearby several kind of trumpet sounds also swung the body to approach, showed off that red clothes intentionally. “这是谁家的耕牛,怎么跑到这儿来了,走开走开！”新郎倌主动迎上去,装模作样地斥喝起来,旁边几个锁呐声也摇摆着身子逼近,故意炫耀那一身红色的衣裳。 That big bull rushed about full of enthusiasm for a long time, had not found the cow that that most delicious green grass and sent out the charming smell, the temperament was gradually hot tempered, sees again these people to provoke intentionally, „moo” a roar, the giant heads of long two sharp buffalo and cow horns slightly were low, display the attack sign. 那头大牯牛兴致勃勃奔波许久,还没找到那最可口的青草和散发出迷人气味的母牛,脾气渐渐暴躁起来,再见这些人故意挑衅,不禁“哞”地一声吼,长有两只锋利牛角的巨大头颅微微低下,表现出了攻击迹象。 „Go away! You want to do!” Ge Duolao person hand/subordinate sees them to detain the bull, flies into a rage, immediately progresses to rush. Directs to cancel the man to turn round to clash open/stretch Yi and open/stretch Yutong negotiates: „surnamed Zhang, you were too mean, if you must violate the previous agreement, the father does not acknowledge mistakes.” “滚开！你们想干什么！”格哚佬手下的人一见他们拦阻牯牛,不禁勃然大怒,立即策马冲了上去。引勾佬回身冲张绎和张雨桐交涉起来:“姓张的,你们太下作了,如果你们要违背先前的约定,老子可不认账。” open/stretch Yida shouted: „You talk nonsense! Others take a wife, what matter closes our Zhang? Is willing to bet to concede, you gave up any idea of that acts shamelessly!” 张绎大喝道:“你放屁！人家娶媳妇儿,关我们张家什么事儿？愿赌服输,你休想耍赖！” „Quickly! Quick ignition!” Firecrackers bunches of places hide in the sedan, the country girl image that plays the role of the bride holds machine gun assistant of ammunition belt passes on rapidly the firecracker, a person hidden lives in the figure taking advantage of the sedan chair, the anxious rocking torch, shook continually several, has not waited for him to blow, the torch „bang” has burnt, happen to singes the gunpowder twist. “快！快点火！”鞭炮一捆捆地藏在轿内,扮新娘的村姑像扶子弹带的机枪副手似的把炮仗迅速传出去,一个人借轿子隐住身形,急急晃动火折子,一连晃了几下,还没等他去吹,火折子已经“嘭”地一声燃烧起来,正好燎到火药捻子。 „......” “啪啪啪啪……” The firecrackers have not spread the sedan chair completely, crack, „new wife” screamed one fiercely, escapes from the sedan chair, she all the way bumpy fierce, received frightening, just escaped from the sedan chair, snatches more than ten far, squats to spit greatly on the lawn. 鞭炮还未完全传出轿子,就剧烈地炸响了,“新娘子”尖叫一声,逃出轿子,她一路上颠簸的厉害,又受了惊吓,刚刚逃出轿子,才抢出十几步远,就蹲在草地上哇哇大吐起来。 That person who is responsible for igniting has not lost heart to want the firecrackers to rescue, but that firecrackers burn fast, explodes the paper scraps horizontally to fly, has no recourse, he has to escape in a panic, waits for that firecrackers to burn the sedan chair, will pile in inside firecracker all ignites...... 负责点火的那个人还不死心地想把鞭炮救出来,可那鞭炮燃的飞快,炸得纸屑横飞,迫不得已,他只好仓惶逃开,等那鞭炮烧进轿子,将堆在里边的炮仗全都点着了…… Listens to „bang” a loud sound, the small sedan chair to be exploded is split up, the firecrackers fly everywhere randomly, that bull was first made the rash by person of one crowd of scarlet wear, was exploded by the fierce firecracker, immediately goes crazy, crazy moo flushes away forward. 就听“轰”地一声巨响,小轿被炸得四分五裂,鞭炮到处乱飞,那头牯牛先是被一群大红穿着的人弄得心浮气躁,再被剧烈的鞭炮声一炸,登时发了疯,狂哞一声就向前冲去。 That firecrackers are planned after lighting, throws to the bull, forcing it to run away to the west, now actually explodes in the dead ahead, these want to tempt the bull to charge into the west drum trumpeter to stand in the west side, makes east side void, that bull instinct escaped to the east side. 那鞭炮原本是打算点燃之后扔向牯牛东侧,迫使它向西面逃的,如今却在正前方爆炸了,那些本想引诱牯牛冲向西面的鼓号手又都站在西侧,使得东侧空虚,那头牯牛本能的就向东侧逃跑了。 open/stretch Yizheng teaches self-important directs to cancel the man to cultivate the behavior to have the acting, accepted bet approximately must recognize, saw that bull to rush to the Zhang intimate place to go suddenly, cannot help but dumbfounded. Directs to cancel the man to see him to be spirited, turns head to look, laughs: „What open/stretch Tushe teaches, the old man acknowledges mistakes! Haha, the old man acknowledges mistakes!” 张绎正老气横秋地教训引勾佬做人要有担当,接受了赌约就要认,忽见那头牯牛奔着张家腹心之地去了,不由得目瞪口呆。引勾佬见他神气古怪,扭头一看,不由哈哈大笑:“张土舍教训的是,老夫认账！哈哈,老夫认账！” open/stretch Yutong saw this scene, a face distortion, Ge Duolao casts a sidelong glance his eyes, the faint smile „new wife” was ridiculing the said/tunnel to that spat greatly spits especially: „Girl just gets married today, in the abdomen has the embryo, the temper is also anxious!” 张雨桐见此情景,面孔一阵扭曲,格哚佬睨了他一眼,似笑非笑地对正在大吐特吐的那位“新娘子”揶揄地道:“姑娘今日刚刚出嫁,腹中就已有了胎儿,性子也是蛮急的！” : Asked the monthly ticket and recommendation ticket honestly! :诚求月票、推荐票！ r1152 r1152 The quickest renewal, reading invited. 最快更新,阅读请。 ... ...
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