Liu Xiaoyong is a university student, dying fat dwelling- both are not contradictory. 刘晓勇是个大学生,还是个死肥宅-两者并不矛盾。 His native place in Guangzhou, oneself also goes study in a university in Guangzhou, the school leaves home five to stand, the less than half lifetime has not gone out of 300 km away. 他老家在羊城,自己也在羊城的一所大学就读,学校离家就五站地,小半辈子没走出过300公里外。 Just like dying fat dwelling, he biggest hobby is to look at the animation, plays the game, next in( against harmony). Going to school time also learns from the teacher, has a vacation learns from the teacher, studied Australia( against harmony) gate casino gets online ; Studied explaining the profound in simple language, racks one's brains ; The studied 800 pivot men rush to the north rim, the infantry bumps the cavalry...... 跟许多死肥宅一样,他最大的爱好就是看动漫、玩游戏、下里(防和谐)番。上学的时候跟老师学,放假的时候也跟老师学,学的澳(防和谐)门赌场上线;学的深入浅出,殚精竭虑;学的八百标兵奔北坡,步兵更把骑兵碰…… 20 years old had not been in love, buy the box life jacket only reason probably are, un, curious. 二十岁了还没谈过恋爱,买盒安全套唯一的原因大概就是,嗯,好奇。 „Oh, another short life ended, good bored......” “唉,又一段短暂的人生结束了,好无聊……” That night, Liu Xiaoyong is holding one barrel of turkey surface, pursued the new animation, somewhat was moved. Each time is like this, just liked an animation female lord each time, has to with its farewell. 这天晚上,刘晓勇抱着一桶火鸡面,哧溜哧溜的追完了新番动漫,不禁有些怅然若失。每次都是这样子,每次刚喜欢上一个动漫女主,就不得不与其告别。 He shakes the head, stands rarely, oneself discard a barrel, carried one dozen of his lemon tea to sit the return dragon chair, returned to the B station home page with the point, renovated, well? 他摇摇头,难得站起来,自己扔掉面桶,又拎了一打维他柠檬茶坐回龙椅,跟着点回b站首页,一刷新,咦？ Very accidental/surprised, the home page big picture replaces unexpectedly temporarily, moreover five pictures turned into one, sees only above one line of large characters: Congratulated moves on to better things, the world of two dimensions you did not understand! 非常意外的,首页大图片居然临时更换,而且五张图片变成了一张,只见上面一行大字:恭贺乔迁,二次元的世界你不懂！ The picture is a beard uncle who wears the Daoist robe, facing lens appearance submissively. 图片则是一位穿道袍的胡子大叔,面对镜头拱手的样子。 What ghost? 什么鬼？ Liu Xiaoyong selects conveniently, this video is long, about a half hour, the barrage has brushed fully, a Yang Yang's piece of tyrant screen. He first closes simply, only watches the content, does not do strangely, is not the hype, but also is really the taoist priest approach. 刘晓勇随手点进去,这视频较长,半小时左右,弹幕已经刷满,乌央乌央的一片霸屏。他索性先关闭,只观看内容,不是搞怪,不是炒作,还真是道士做法。 The place in the entrance of new office building, suspended an altar probably, on the table had three domestic animal four fruits, three high-grade incense. Several people are divided into two rows, worships on bended knees about, the uncle stands in the middle gesticulates. 地点好像在新办公楼的入口处,摆了一张供桌,桌上有三牲四果,三支高香。十几个人分成两列,在左右跪拜,那大叔就站在中间比比划划。 Perhaps wore the wheat, hears clearly: 许是戴了麦,听得清清楚楚: „Mounting the stage essence, the dim light is crisp, protects my figure, the deal with changes not stops. God light/only Yi Yi, day unreliably deep, understands thoroughly five lines, the roaming imaginary Taoist trinity, I kneel down now, the valuable master of great moral integrity and learning passes through......” “太上台精,幽光爽灵,卫我身形,应变无停。神光奕奕,天玄地冥,洞澈五行,游幻三清,吾今顶礼,宝道师经……” Lying trough! 卧槽！ Liu Xiaoyong looks dumbfounded, he does not understand, but can suppose indistinctly, this seems like the incantation that the cleanroom exorcises. Said seriously, how to take a look how to tease the ratio ; Said talks nonsense, everyone facial expression is serious, the stance is reverent. 刘晓勇看的一愣一愣的,他不太懂,但隐约能估摸出,这好像是净室驱邪的咒语。说严肃吧,咋瞅咋逗比;说扯蛋吧,偏偏每个人神情郑重,姿态虔诚。 The barrage is the play essence: 弹幕就更是戏精: „Later the barrage added some symbol yellow paper to be good.” “以后弹幕加些道符黄纸就好了。” „Slides, killed a programmer to offer sacrifice to heaven on the difference!” “溜溜溜,就差杀个程序员祭天了！” „Suppression ghost( against harmony) livestock, nature.” “镇压鬼(防和谐)畜,道法自然。” „Regarded as please the B taoist priest approach......” “看成了请个b道士做法……” „Previous time sees this scene, is in the car(riage) late country, but at that time was three taoist priests......” “上次看到这个场面,还是在车迟国,不过当时是三个道士……” Ha! Liu Xiaoyong loved this fellows, the hand according to the keyboard moment, followed one: „Day spirit spirit earth deities spirit, the Radio and TV Bureau puts a line!” 哈哈哈！刘晓勇爱死这帮家伙了,手按键盘片刻,也噼里啪啦的追随一条:“天灵灵地灵灵,广电总局放个行！” Sends this barrage, this matter crossed to him even. However he takes a look at will, well, the video has a half hour, difficult to help is the taoist priest approach? 发完这条弹幕,此事对他而言就算翻过。不过他随意一瞅,咦,视频有半个多小时,难不成全是道士做法？ Liu Xiaoyong holds down the dragging strip in the future, by about 20 minutes, the content changed, actually in the star reception room in B station, that uncle is interviewed. 刘晓勇按住拖动条往后一拉,到了二十分钟左右,内容一变,却是在b站的明星会客室里,那位大叔正接受采访。 „Priest Chen, couple of days ago was in July 15, as the saying goes festival of the fifteenth day of the seventh lunar month, the ghost gate opened. You said, in this world has ghost?” “陈道长,前两天是七月十五,俗话说中元节,鬼门开。那您说说,这世上到底有鬼么？” „This I am not good to reply simply. First I must tell everyone a point, the fear originate from unknown, when you have to a thing understand, in your heart will be more relaxed......” “这个我不好简单回答。首先我要告诉大家一点,恐惧来源于未知,当你对一种事物有所了解的时候,你心中就会轻松许多……” Daoist priest physique strange is handsome, the deportment is coquettish, looks on the unique level, „ according to the concept of our Taoism, in this world has ghost. But this ghost, is not in the film and television play, such that or novel described, the fiendish features, did all kinds of evil, elusive. 那道长身姿奇俊,仪态风骚,看着就特有水准,“按照我们道教的观念,这世上是有鬼的。但这种鬼,并不是影视剧里,或小说里描述的那样,青面獠牙,作恶多端,来无影去无踪的。 Taoism believes, the world myriad things are Dawson. This say/way, you can understand the air/Qi, the world myriad things are the air/Qi live, the ghost is also the same. 道家认为,天地万物都是道生。这个道,你可以理解成气,天地万物都是气所生,鬼也一样。 When the person died, his air/Qi cannot congeal, will separate to dissipate. Some air/Qi vanish in the world directly, some combine with others' air/Qi, forms the new vitality, some transformation, turned into the animal, or inscription on stone tablet and bronze vegetation...... ” 当人死去的时候,他的气凝结不住,就会分离消散。有的气直接消失于天地,有的与别人的气组合,形成新的生机,有的发生了转换,变成了动物,或者金石草木……” He explained that straightforward, is novel and interesting in approach. The barrage is scarce for a while, does not know that was the person walked, being enthralled that looked. 他解释了一通,浅显易懂,立意新颖。弹幕一时稀少起来,不知是人走了,还是看的入神。 Afterward, the host also asked: „The story of folklore has ghost upper body, is that fishy the upper body, how should we avoid?” 随后,主持人又问:“民间传说有鬼上身的故事,那到底有没有鬼上身,我们该如何避免呢？” As soon as Liu Xiaoyong listens, immediately the spirit concentrates on. Because in couple of days ago, an own schoolmate got through first seven to the grandmother, person well was suddenly insane. 刘晓勇一听,顿时精神专注。因为就在前两天,自己的一个同学给姥姥办完头七,好好的人突然就疯了。 This matter in class and grade group noisy was very big, said that shut in the mental institution. At that time some people concluded, this must hits the ghost! 此事在班级群里闹的很大,说是关进了精神病院。当时就有人断定,这必是撞鬼了！ „Ghost upper body is the folk rumor, Taoism asks ‚Yang Shuaizhao to damage, the gloom to/clashes’. The ghost is the gloom that the vitality/angry separation forms, some people physicals emaciated, is distracted, Yang spirit is not very sufficient, the nature is easy to provoke the gloom......, therefore has these scholars of characteristics, suggested to get the sunlight, the strong body and spirit and willpower, did not want last year the long gloomy place, or touched some for a long time very strange thing, they likely received the gloom to gradually influence, was harmful to the body.” “鬼上身是民间传言,道家叫‘阳衰招损,阴气相冲’。鬼是生气分离所形成的阴气,有些人体质孱弱,精神恍惚,本身的阳气就不够充足,自然容易招惹阴气……所以有这些特点的居士,建议多晒晒阳光,强健体魄和意志力,不要去年久阴暗的地方,或碰触一些很久很陌生的物件,它们很可能受阴气熏染,对身体有害。” „, Is this! You talked about the strong body and spirit a moment ago, I think suddenly, elementary and middle schools healthy body technique that now the country carries out, if the side has the meeting, might as well studies, simple effective. Priest Chen, the last issue, can you speak some related folk customs, with item that some need to pay attention to?” The host asked. “哦,原来是这样啊！您刚才讲到强健体魄,我忽然想起来,现在国家推行的中小学健体术,如果身边有会的,不妨学习学习,简单有效。那陈道长,最后一个问题了,您能不能讲一些相关的民间习俗,和一些需要注意的事项？”主持人问。 „Ok, the folk custom has the difference respectively, but is quite general, is first seven, it has one set of very strict program norm......” “可以,民间的习俗各有不同,但比较通行的,就是头七,它有一套非常严格的程序规范……” ! 咝！ Liu Xiaoyong listens to listen, then thinks that the back sends coolly, under the corner, the window root and bed will drill a thing probably momentarily, even places under the table both legs, is chilly trembling. 刘晓勇听着听着,便觉后背发凉,墙角、窗根、床下好像随时都会钻出一个东西来,甚至放在桌子底下的双腿,也是冷飕飕的发颤。 He closed/pass the video, wears to wear arriving living room. 他啪的关了视频,趿拉趿拉的走到客厅。 The parents are watching the television, is the news, was skillful, is the host interviews a ministerial-level official, talked about the funeral tradition. 老爸老妈正在看电视,是个新闻节目,巧了,也是主持人采访一位部级官员,大谈丧葬传统。 „ Xia Country with a history of 5000 years, left behind many folk traditions. For example weddings and funerals that the common people always said that the weddings and funerals, this custom are many, and spreads now. “夏国有5000年历史,留下了很多民俗传统。比如老百姓总说的红白喜事,婚丧嫁娶,这个规矩就非常非常多,并且流传到现在。 Couple of days ago was festival of the fifteenth day of the seventh lunar month, I just had the vacation, had one to sweep the graves. Experience , actually very grieved...... burns paper resembling money this matter, actually the government advocated many years, wanted the civilized sacrificial offering, some places also proposed method that the fresh flower traded the paper money, but the actual result was not optimistic. 前两天是中元节,我刚好有假期,就带着一家去扫墓。一路所见所闻,呃,其实挺心痛的……烧纸这个事情,其实政府倡导很多年了,要文明祭祀,有些地方还提出鲜花换纸钱的方法,但实际效果并不乐观。 In the city also calculates, in the general rural areas, burns paper resembling money quite universally. Our experts have made investigation and study, in this year's festival of the fifteenth day of the seventh lunar month, merely one day of time, pm2.5 of Capital City rose dramatically 15 times. 城市里还算可以,就是在广大的农村地区,烧纸相当普遍。我们的专家做过一项调研,在今年的中元节,仅仅一天时间,京城的pm2.5就飙升了15倍。 You are not possibly clear, after one bunch of paper money burn, can produce an approximately 3 jin (0.5 kg) carbon dioxide! Also has the sulphur dioxide, nitrogen oxide, the aromatic compo und wait/etc., is very serious to the pollution of air. 你们可能不清楚,一捆纸钱燃烧后,就能产生约三斤的二氧化碳！同时还有二氧化硫、氮氧化物、多环芳烃等等,对空气的污染特别严重。 Therefore we currently have the consideration, centers on the rural area, gradual, the reasonable reduced burning paper resembling money behavior, advocates the civilized sacrificial offering and funeral, including pure brightness, Zhongyuan, winter cloth festival, even first seven...... ” 所以我们目前就有考量,以农村地区为重点,逐步的、合理的减少烧纸行为,倡导文明祭祀、丧葬,包括清明,中元,寒衣节,甚至头七……” „First seven?” The host breaks. “头七？”主持人打断。 „Right, this many knew, must burn paper resembling money. First did not discuss regardless the feudal superstition, we respect these traditions, but we must know, the environmental management pollutes imminently! Over a thousand years of thing impossible one generation to eliminate, but the concept of person is transforming slowly, perhaps after several generations, we can discard to burn money, the choice use the fresh flower sustenance mournful thought......” “对,这个很多人都晓得,也是要烧纸的。先抛开封建迷信不谈,我们尊重这些传统,但我们更要知道,治理环境污染迫在眉睫！上千年的东西不可能一代人就摒除,可人的观念在慢慢转变,也许几代人后,我们都能舍弃烧钱,选择用鲜花寄托哀思……” Un? 嗯？ Liu Xiaoyong by a sensitivity and sharpness of dying fat dwelling, does not sense instantaneously right. He fishes out the cell phone, brushes the micro blog, really arranges is searching for third hotly, impressively two large characters, first seven! 刘晓勇以一个死肥宅的敏感度和锐利,瞬间觉出不对。他摸出手机,刷了刷微博,果然排在热搜第三位的,赫然两个大字,头七！ The point goes in looks, some introduced that local first seven customs, some denounced severely the feudal superstition, some vowed solemnly, said the ghost effectively...... all kinds, extremely busy. 点进去一瞧,有的介绍当地的头七习俗,有的痛斥封建迷信,有的信誓旦旦,说鬼魂灵验……五花八门,热闹非凡。 „......” “……” He blinks, the website, micro blog and television, three great platform, almost assumed full responsibility of the audience of all classes. simultaneous/uniform simultaneous/uniform assumes an awe-inspiring pose, for a funeral, first seven? 他眨了眨眼睛,网站、微博、电视,三大平台,几乎包揽了所有阶层的受众。齐齐发威,就为了一个丧葬,一个头七？ He always does not feel right, may not also be able to say. 他总感觉不对劲,可又说不出来。 „Yeah, doesn't here burn paper resembling money? What to do first seven also without cross, I remember for more than ten years ago, gives my grandmother to manage one time, later would have no to see.” “哎,我们这儿早就不烧纸了吧？头七也没怎么办过,我就记得十几年前,给我姥姥办过一次,以后就没见着。” But at this time, the mother opens the mouth suddenly. 而此时,老妈忽然开口。 „Un, 45 years ago, in the city has not seen has burnt paper resembling money, but returns to one's old home also has.” The father said. “嗯,四五年前吧,城里就没见过烧纸了,不过回老家还有。”老爸道。 „Also others forbid no wonder, now the haze is so heavy, must increase many pm2.5.” The mother said. “也难怪人家禁止,现在雾霾这么重,得增加多少pm2.5。”老妈道。 „Fart! The factory pollutes, no matter, the goose bumps of manager common people, drive, cook food and turn on the air conditioning, special influence environment. Now burns paper resembling money to manage continually, if really fishy, first catches them!” “屁了！工厂污染不管,总管老百姓的鸡毛蒜皮,开车、烧菜、开空调,都特么影响环境。现在连烧纸都管,要是真有鬼啊,第一个抓他们！” ! 呀！ Liu Xiaoyong almost calls out in alarm, father a few words pierced the window paper, his using energy brains do not want to come out: If really fishy! 刘晓勇差点惊叫,老爸一句话捅破了窗户纸,他费劲脑汁也没想出来的:要是真有鬼啊！ .................. ……………… „, I admire these to carry out the plan, the brain circuit is always different from the average man.” “啧啧,我就佩服那些搞策划的,脑回路总跟常人不一样。” On Phoenix Mountain, Gu Yu brushed several groups of news, could not bear the sigh. 凤凰山上,顾玙刷完了几拨新闻,忍不住感叹。 „Simple and crude, the government clarified did not acknowledge, but dark stamp the ignores folk discussed secretly, oneself controlled the public opinion, the guidance direction, old repertoire.” Xiaozhai shakes the head. “简单粗暴,政府摆明了不承认,可又暗戳戳的放任民间私议,自己把控舆论,引导方向,老套路了。”小斋摇头。 „Even old repertoire, good that but others use, the folk has this foundation, naturally must expand the imaginary space......” “就算是老套路,但人家用的好,民间有这个基础,自然要扩展一下想象空间……” Gu Yu smiles, said: „No matter how the science and technology develops, believes has ghost also has plenty of such people. Let the people brain make up, this is the fiercest place. I estimated that is only the first step, will also have the follow-up movement.” 顾玙笑了笑,道:“不管科技怎么发展,相信有鬼的也大有人在。让群众自行脑补,这是最厉害的地方。我估计只是第一步,还会有后续动作。” „Follow-up movement?” “后续动作？” Chao Kongtu who has drunk tea silently interrupted suddenly, said: „I pour some features.” 一直默默喝茶的晁空图忽然插嘴,道:“我倒有些眉目。” „Material where you dig up?” Xiaojin is curious. “你从哪儿扒的料？”小堇好奇。 „Master just transmitted the verbal message, said that now many of too ghost upper body, the manpower was serious, asking me to help in the past. And one group of people turn over to me to manage, is best more intensive stresses the ghost Taoist skill.” “师父刚传来口信,说现在鬼上身的太多,人手严重不足,叫我过去帮忙。并且有一批人归我管理,最好速成一些抓鬼道术。” Chao Kongtu is quite helpless , to continue saying: „Is, the official invited a several descendant from Hong Kong Island and southern coastal provinces, as well as that Tianshifu that goes into exile in the overseas direct descendant.” 晁空图颇为无奈,继续道:“还有就是,官方从港岛、南洋请了几位正一后裔,以及那位流亡海外的天师府嫡系。” „......” “……” One hear of this words, Gu Yu and Xiaozhai are startled, is this shenma the meaning? The government must do the matter! 一听此言,顾玙和小斋都是一怔,这是神马意思？政府要搞事情啊！ Xiaojin is quite straightforward, strange say/way: „Invited that group of lows did? Spends to deliver to hit the face?” 小堇比较耿直,奇道:“请那帮下三滥的来干嘛？花钱送打脸么？” „On helps catch the ghost outwardly, in fact...... hehe, nothing but builds the momentum, lets everyone guarding the threshing floor monkey play, helping them propagandize.” “明面上帮忙抓鬼,实际上……呵呵,无非营造声势,让大家看场猴戏,便于他们宣传罢了。” Chao Kongtu puts down the cup, in the chuckle passes a cold intent to be dreary. 晁空图放下杯子,轻笑中透着一股冷意萧然。 (, Several days later, I was driver of legitimate driving!) (哈哈哈哈,再过几天,我就是合法驾驶的司机了！)