DTYWIWMS :: Volume #7

#69: salt fish Thor's transformation plan as well as to the God of Salt Fish's following arrangement...

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Li Jie stayed on the sand had almost one hour.? 李杰呆坐在沙上已经有差不多一个小时了。? Eight? One Chinese 八?一中文 W ( 1 ) WW.81ZW. COM fat Thor watches the television, while is eating the thing. Entire only fried chicken before him finished eating originally. W㈠WW．８１ZW.COM胖托尔正一边看着电视,一边吃着东西。原本在他面前的一整只炸鸡已经吃完了。 After he starts to eat meal the small between-meal snack, buys potato wedges that from the corner. Coordinates the ketchup cola together to enjoy. He lets life of oneself very much diligently like Earthling. 他开始吃饭后的小零食,从转角买回来的薯角。配合着番茄酱就着可乐一起享用。他很努力的让自己像一个地球人一样的生活。 Eats the junk food, watches variety show, leaves that dead dwelling same laughter. 吃垃圾食品,看综艺节目,出那种死宅一样的笑声。 Thor that nobody safeguards, seems like placed in Alaska of maternal family is the same. By an air flush ball, increases in this short one month in rapid inflation. 没有人看管的托尔,就像是被寄养在外婆家的阿拉斯加一样。以一种吹气球的度,在这短短的一个多月的时间里迅的膨胀变大。 Li Jie is hanging down the head, in his present brain is starch. „Are you doing every day, Thor?” In the Li Jie's sound has one type such as the dream imaginary elusive feeling. Probably his soul pulled out in this flash to the body of oneself. 李杰低垂着脑袋,他现在脑内都是一片浆糊。“你现在每天都在干什么,托尔？”李杰的声音中有一种如梦似幻的空灵感。好像他的灵魂在这一瞬间就被抽离了自己的身体。 Knows that now he has not dared to look up one, that garbage heap fatty. 知道现在他还不敢抬头去看一眼,那个窝在沙里的胖子。 „Studies the daily life of humankind. Odin requests me to study the humbleness of humankind. I think to need from understanding the daily life of mortal. The personal habits start.” Thor watches the television, while has drunk cola. After drinking up, has hit full belch. “学习人类的日常生活。奥丁要求我学习人类的谦逊。我觉得需要从了解凡人的日常生活。饮食起居入手。”托尔一边看着电视,一边又喝了一口可乐。喝完之后还打了个饱嗝。 Li Jie disguises oneself not to hear the sound that Thor makes a belch. Should say that the Thor original intention is good, Li Jie is comforting oneself like this. 李杰假装自己没有听到托尔打嗝的声音。应该说托尔本意是好的,李杰这样安慰着自己。 „Therefore, what you currently do have to realize?” Li Jie makes the oneself tone set level with as far as possible. He thinks toward the good aspect the matter as far as possible, what if Thor did comprehend really? “所以,你现在有什么体会吗？”李杰尽量让自己的语气放平和。他尽量把事情往好的方面去想,万一托尔真的领悟到了什么呢？ „Temporarily did not have too many comprehensions. However I presently cola matches the fried chicken truly is the food of delicacy.” Thor watches the television program, hā hā laughter, while was answering the Li Jie's issue. “暂时还没有太多的领悟。不过我现可乐配炸鸡确实是很美味的食物。”托尔看着电视节目,一边出哈哈的笑声,一边回答着李杰的问题。 Because the Thor laughter is too big, has created the stir of his body. Caused the sand under his buttocks to have slight entire to tremble. 因为托尔笑声太大,引起了他身体的震动。导致了他屁股下的沙都有了轻微的整颤。 Although Li Jie does not want to face the present situation very much, but he has to ask one. „Are you eating fried chicken to drink cola every day? In the month that I leave in?” 李杰虽然很不想面对现在的情况,但是他还是不得不开口问了一句。“你现在每天都在吃炸鸡喝可乐？在我离开的这一个多月的时间里？” Thor has pondered slightly. „Almost, returns to Immortal Palace to start from Valkyrie. I went to the corner the fried chicken shop to buy the fried chicken to come back, when the supper ate.” 托尔略微思考了一下。“差不多吧,从瓦尔基里回到仙宫开始。我去转角的炸鸡店买了炸鸡回来当晚餐吃。” „How many do you eat every day?” Li Jie felt that the blue vein of oneself soon blasted open. “你每天吃多少？”李杰感觉自己的青筋快要炸裂了。 „In the morning generally is to eat hotly high. At noon and I will eat entire only fried chicken in the evening, coordinates potato wedges, the donut and ice cream.” Thor watches in the television, Gordon? Ramsay was cursing the students of these making the mistake vegetables/dishes to think very interesting. He has learned some new thick mouth skills. “早上一般是吃热高。中午和晚上我会吃一整只炸鸡,配合薯角,甜甜圈和冰淇淋。”托尔看着电视里,戈登?拉姆齐正在咒骂那些做错菜的学员觉得很有趣。他又学会了一些新的粗口技巧。 „Don't you drink now?” The Li Jie's blood started to circulate. “你现在不喝酒了？”李杰的血液都开始加循环了。 „No, I present. The cola flavor is also actually pretty good. Why does not know, although first mouth time I resist cola very much. However after drinking, I started to feel that a little became addicted. This flavor really pretty good. I drink this every day.” Thor holds up the cola bottle that 1.5 L installs, hints oneself to have loves cola. “不,我现了。可乐其实味道也不赖。不知道为什么,虽然第一口的时候我很抗拒可乐。但是喝多了以后我开始感觉有一点上瘾了。这个味道真的不赖。我现在每天都喝这个。”托尔举起1.5L装的可乐瓶,示意一下自己有多爱可乐。 „Every day drinks this?” Li Jie does not make the oneself anger show diligently. “每天都喝这个？”李杰努力不让自己的怒火展现出来。 „Yes, one day of probably four bottles.” Thor does not know what completely oneself said is what kind of digit. cola that 1.5 L installs, a day drinks 4 bottles. “是的,一天大概四瓶。”托尔完全不知道自己说的是怎么样的一个数字。1.5L装的可乐,一天喝4瓶。 Anybody knows that like this drinks the sugar that cola brings to divide and quantity of heat/calories is explodes simply! 任何人都知道这样喝可乐所带来的糖分和热量简直就是爆炸好吗！ This month of nobody supervises, making the Thor's diet start to indulge the free casualness to eat. Thor only eats thing that oneself likes, for example fried chicken, for example burger, for example ice cream. 还有这一个月无人监管,让托尔的饮食开始放纵自由的随便吃。托尔只吃自己喜欢的东西,比如炸鸡,比如汉堡,比如冰淇淋。 potato wedges that explodes freshly is joined to ketchup is the snack. The entire only fried chicken is the staple food, occasionally matches burger to eat. In addition after food , the donut and ice cream of dessert. The drinks all are cola. 新鲜炸出来的薯角配上番茄酱是小吃。整只的炸鸡是主食,偶尔搭配一下汉堡吃。再加上饭后甜点的甜甜圈与冰淇淋。饮品全是可乐。 This diet pattern completely is a calorie bomb! 这种饮食模式完全就是卡路里炸弹好吗！ Therefore Li Jie does not see Thor about one month, but actually has not recognized the Thor's appearance now. He complete swollen to distorting! 所以李杰才不见托尔一个月左右的时间,但是现在却已经认不出托尔的样子了。他已经完全浮肿到变形了好吗！ Especially after he gives up pondering Immortal Palace and fight, the total involvement puts into the life of mortal. And starts to be infatuated with the television to start, the condition of this swollen started. 尤其是在他放弃去思考仙宫和战斗以后,全身心投入凡人的生活。并且开始迷恋电视机开始,这种浮肿的状态就开始加了。 Because his daily life found the television program that oneself wants to watch, then opened cola as well as between -meal snack watched the television while ate and drank. Especially learns to use the telephone in him, and knows after the telephone reserves this type of thing. 因为他每天的生活就是找到自己想看的电视节目,然后打开可乐以及零食一边看电视一边吃吃喝喝。尤其是在他学会使用电话,并且知道电话订餐这种东西以后。 He every day necessary went to the corner to buy food the movement not to need to do. He only needs to telephone, fried chicken burger, potato wedges ice cream donut. These things, the shop owner will make sales clerk send. 他连每天必要的去转角处买食物的运动也不需要做了。他只需要一通电话,炸鸡汉堡,薯角冰淇淋甜甜圈。这些东西,店家都会让店员派送过来。 He only needed the garbage heap waiting to be OK. Although Thor also a little wonders, the life of mortal is so relaxed joyfully, why Odin must say that is humble from mortal study? 他只需要窝在沙里等待就可以了。虽然托尔也有点纳闷,凡人的生活这么轻松愉悦,为什么奥丁还要说从凡人这学习谦逊呢？ Moreover can this joyful life understand the life really the meaning? Thor expressed that did not understand very much, therefore he can only increase to the study effort of mortal. Wallowing even more in the cola fried chicken and variety show. 而且这种快乐的生活真的能够体会到生命的含义吗？托尔表示不是很理解,于是他只能加大对凡人的学习力度。愈加的沉迷于可乐炸鸡与综艺节目里面了。 When Li Jie arrived here, now he sees is not ordinary salt fish, but is one is swollened in a big way by the perquisite, even there is ultimate salt fish of to split open sign. 所以当李杰来到这里的时候,他现在看到的不是一条普通的咸鱼,而是一条被油水泡胀大,甚至有开裂迹象的终极咸鱼。 Li Jie thought that if Odin sees now the Thor's appearance, perhaps Loki can certainly become Asgard's King. Because Odin will certainly not make such fat dwelling Thor succeed to the throne, if he succeeds to the throne to become God King, that simply is to the Asgard's biggest insult! 李杰觉得,如果奥丁看到现在托尔的样子,恐怕洛基一定能当上阿斯迦德的王了。因为奥丁一定不会让这样的肥宅托尔继位的,如果他继位成为神王,那简直是对阿斯迦德的最大的侮辱！ Perhaps Odin without hesitation executes personally Thor, because there are such son, insulted the Odin's god name simply. 说不定奥丁会毫不犹豫的将托尔亲手处决掉,因为有这样的儿子,简直是侮辱了奥丁的神名。 But as is responsible for raising Thor's Li Jie in the world, definitely also because raising will pay no attention, only knows that will feed the food to Thor, but will never lead him to exit to take a walk. Causes him to walk to form the waste dwelling. As the joint and several liability, Li Jie definitely also will be massacred by Odin. 而作为在人间负责饲养托尔的李杰,肯定也会因为饲养不理,只知道给托尔喂饭,但是从来不带他出去遛弯。导致其走形成废宅。作为连带责任,李杰肯定也会被奥丁杀掉的。 Thinks of here, Li Jie felt suddenly a back is cool. This is he comes Marvel World 10 several years later, first time feels the most fearful crisis. Must know, Heimdall's both eyes can see Earth's from Asgard directly! 想到这里,李杰忽然感觉到一阵后背凉。这才是他来漫威世界十几年后,第一次感到最可怕的危机。要知道,海姆达尔的双眼是能够从阿斯迦德直接看到地球的啊！ If some day Odin will miss Thor, making Heimdall help him look at a Thor present situation, then all these exposed! When the time comes angry can Odin open Bifrost to descend to earth directly. 要是某天奥丁思念托尔了,让海姆达尔帮他看一眼托尔现在的情况,那么这一切都暴露了啊！到时候愤怒的奥丁会不会直接打开彩虹桥下凡。 Then lifts his Lightning magic staff to take the Li Jie's poor life? Li Jie thought suddenly all these are very possible. 然后举着他的闪电法杖来取李杰的小命？李杰忽然觉得这一切都是很可能的啊。 „Thor did you recently have to feel where is uncomfortable?” Li Jie's back by his sweat moistening, the weather is not obviously hot, but he flowed many perspiration, this was by the matter that just in the oneself brain thought frightening. “托尔你最近有没有感到什么地方不舒服？”李杰的后背都已经被他的汗水给打湿了,明明天气不热,但是他还是流了很多汗,这是被刚刚自己脑中所想的事情给吓的。 „Is uncomfortable? Probably a little.” Thor some are indefinite. “不舒服？好像有一点吧。”托尔有些不确定。 „After probably squats down stands up, I will sometimes think the dizziness vertigo. The body of mortal may be really strange, I am the god body time, never has this situation.” “好像蹲下以后站起,我有时候会觉得头晕眼花。凡人的身体可真奇怪,我还是神躯的时候,从来没有这种情况。” This is not the body of mortal is strange! You are the omen of hypertension! Like this eats the thing, you have good of possibility stroke anytime! Li Jie in innermost feelings crazy call. 这不是凡人的身体奇怪吧！你这是高血压的前兆啊！这样吃东西,你随时都有可能中风的好不好！李杰在内心疯狂的呐喊。 „Recently went to bathroom, the bewildered thinking urination somewhat sticks. I a little could not master the body of mortal. Your this?” Thor said question looks at Li Jie. “还有就是最近上厕所,莫名其妙的觉得小便有些粘。我真的有点搞不懂凡人的身体了。你们都这样吗？”托尔说完疑问的看着李杰。 This is not the issue of mortal, your this Tm had the diabetes! Li Jie felt that he is unable to look straight ahead Thor thoroughly. 这不是凡人的问题吧,你这Tm就是有糖尿病了吧！李杰感觉他彻底无法直视托尔了。 Although beforehand Thor is crude, but is at least honest and heroic. However now he perhaps continually crude and impulsive capital did not have. 虽然之前的托尔鲁莽冲动,但是至少正直且英勇。但是现在他恐怕连鲁莽和冲动的资本都没有了。 Once Thor's took off the clothes is a shank meat, modern Thor took off the clothes to only have an inexpensive meat! 曾经托尔的脱掉衣服是一身腱子肉,现代的托尔脱掉衣服只有一身贱肉了！ When Thor wants to drink cola again, Li Jie finally thorough exploding. His has overturned cola in Thor hand, he thorough violent walked. This perhaps is his these years the first time so rude. 当托尔再一次想要喝一口可乐的时候,李杰终于彻底的爆了。他一手打翻了托尔手中的可乐,他已经彻底的暴走了。这恐怕是他这些年来第一次如此失态。 „Drinks! Your oneself wanted to turn into salt fish dead, why must also drag launching me! I have thought you are only a little waste, the brain is not very good. Although a little salt fish, but also calculates that has the medicine to rescue! However your salt fish degree my imagination! You are thorough God of Salt Fish!” “喝喝喝！你自己想要变成咸鱼死掉也就算了,为什么要把我也拖下水！我一直以为你只是有点废,脑子不是很好。虽然有点咸鱼,但是还算有药可救！但是你咸鱼的程度过我的想象了！你已经是彻底的一条咸鱼之神了！” In Li Jie this angry cursing, even takes some expressions that the previous generation has cursed at people. 李杰这一次愤怒的咒骂中,甚至带上了前世骂人的一些语气。 „You listened, damned fatty! No matter how I now you turn into this pitiful look. However starting from tomorrow I will supervise you, you later cannot drink cola, cannot eat the fried chicken, cannot eat any high thermal food! I will give you to match the appropriate recipes.” “你听好了,死胖子！我现在不管你是怎么变成这个熊样的。但是从明天开始我会监督你,你以后不许喝可乐,不许吃炸鸡,不许吃任何高热量的食物！我会给你搭配出合适的食谱。” „You are any appearance, you should immediately change to me. Otherwise, was careful that I give you to be attractive! Looks at anything to look at damned fatty! Looks at father to beat to death you again! You not only need study now humbly to me, moreover must all subtract to me your inexpensive meat! Otherwise I will be impolite to you! Starting today, you cannot eat these again. Now rolls to me, goes to the swimming pool to swim the 5000 meter!” “你原来是什么样子,你最好马上给我变回去。否则的话,小心我给你好看！看什么看死胖子！再看老子揍死你！你现在不光要给我学习谦逊,而且还要把你那一身贱肉全给我减掉！否则的话我不会对你客气了！从今天开始,你不许再吃这些了。现在给我滚起来,去游泳池里游五千米！” Li Jie threatens has seized the television remote control device in Thor hand, the drink as well as food. He with one unprecedented castigation manner, as well as a Thor unreadable anger with enforcing to be roaring these words to Thor. 李杰气势汹汹的夺过了托尔手中的电视遥控器,饮料以及食物。他以一种前所未有的苛责态度,以及一种托尔难以理解的愤怒与严肃对着托尔咆哮出这些话。 Moreover the Thor first time feels murderous aura from Li Jie, he is not cracking a joke. If oneself does not defer to does, Li Jie that he said that will kill oneself. Thor first time felt that the fearfulness of this mortal, he wants to murder the god unexpectedly! 而且托尔第一次从李杰身上感受到杀气,他不是在开玩笑的。如果自己不按照他说的去做,李杰真的会杀了自己的。托尔第一次感觉到这个凡人的可怕,他居然想要弑神！ But in Li Jie's at heart, how he started to calculate to start to train this good for nothing. Thor, you are inferior to Loki. Might as well simply make Loki go, when east Asgard's King, he in province turns into villain to do does the west. 而在李杰的心里,他已经开始要盘算怎么开始训练这一只废物点心了。托尔啊,你真的不如洛基啊。不如干脆还是让洛基去当阿斯迦德的王,也省的他变成反派搞东搞西。 After you restore divine power, relieved was swindled salt fish in Earth, at least on Earth also has your this salt fish the place of taking shelter. Li Jie silently is thinking, he already, in the consideration wanted the means to see one side Loki. 你还是恢复神力以后,安心的在地球上当一条咸鱼吧,至少地球上还有你这条咸鱼的容身之地。李杰默默的想着,他已经在考虑是不是要相办法去见洛基一面了。 Perhaps, oneself can reach an agreement with Loki. After all from previous and Loki's contact, Loki is not bad. But the most important point, Loki is intelligent enough, perhaps oneself can reach the agreement at certain matters with him. 也许,自己能够和洛基达成一点共识。毕竟从上次与洛基的接触来看,洛基并没有那么坏。而最重要的一点,洛基足够聪明,也许自己能够在某些事情上与他达成共识。 For example keeps on some God of Salt Fish Earth? 比如把某条咸鱼之神留在地球上？
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